The Anakin and Padme Letters
by ArwenMUC
Summary: Anakin and Padme write to one another, first forming a friendship, during the events of TPM. Throughout it all, they discuss the Naboo Invasion, the war, and more. It begins during TPM and will go through the events of ROTS
1. Note 1 Anakin

Author's Notes:

**1. I do not own SW or any of the official SW characters.**

**2. These letters should not be taken literally  
**

**3. This story is AU**

**4. I'm having co-writers write the part of Padme.**

**The Author of each of these Notes will be clearly labled.**

**Timeframe: From TPM (Watto's shop) through ROTJ events**

**The quick background story of the Padmé and Anakin Notes-**

**Padmé, Qui-Gon, R2-D2, and Jar-Jar have just left their ship in order to find the part they need for their damaged ship. They have entered Watto's shop...**

**Anakin, working in Watto's shop notices the girl Padmé and begins talking with her...**

**And the story begins... **

**______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
**

Note 1:  
To the girl that looks like an angel,

Are you an angel? I don't know where you're from, but you look like an angel. I've heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They're the most beautiful creatures in the universe.

I hope you don't mind if I talk to you. I'm supposed to be cleaning things in the shop for my master, but I don't get to see beautiful angels very often. I'm sure he won't notice if I stop working to write you.

Well, I hope you don't mind if a 9 year old writes you. I just want to be your friend…because…I can't tell you…you'd think I was stupid.

My name is Anakin Skywalker, by the way.

Anakin Skywalker


	2. Note 2 Padme

Anakin,

I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm really not an angel. I'm from Naboo and my name is Padme. I was so happy to hear from you because I really enjoyed talking to you in Watto's shop. You can write to me anytime you want, I would love to hear from you and know how you are doing. I can't promise that I will be able to reply right away, but I will certainly write you back as soon as I can.

Padme


	3. Note 3 Anakin

Note 3  
Padme,

Okay. Thanks for telling me you're not an angel…but you do look like one…what I think one would look like.

You're from the planet Naboo? I've heard of it. I know that it has a very distinct kind of ship….I know all about ships from every planet. What's it like? I only know about the ships.

You said that you're here with your friends…but I don't see anyone with you besides that guy and that weird thing with long ears. Is the man your father? Are you farmers from Naboo? You look like you are. What's being a farm girl like?

My master's just finished talking to your father.

So why did you come here? How long will you be staying?

Please don't think I'm weird, but sometimes I get certain feelings…and most of the time I'm right…but sometimes I'm wrong. You know what I was going to tell you on the first letter? I think I'm going to marry you when I get older. No girls ever talk to me…and I feel this special thing for you…it's like I know I'm going to marry you or something. Do you get that too?

I really liked talking to you too. Thanks for letting me write you.

Watto's my master. I'm his slave and Watto owns me and my mom. If I ever tried to kill Watto he would press that button and kill me. He'd probably kill my mom too. He beats us sometimes when he's not happy with our work. I don't care if he beats me….but it's when he beats my mom that I get angry.

Please don't go…um…my friend…the street shop lady Jira told me that a sandstorm is coming up. Sandstorms come up very quickly and sometimes the dust can be so bad that you cannot see 2 feet in front of you. They are very, very dangerous and can sometimes last for hours. If you don't have shelter, would you like to come over to my house? I'm sure my mom wouldn't mind.

How did you like those Siesel cakes? I'll be sure to tell Jira what you think of them. I did not have enough money on me to buy a cake for myself, but I was able to buy you and Jar-Jar and that man a cake. It was when I dropped the coins that I was able to see Qui-Gon's laser sword. When he bent over to help me pick them up, I saw it.

Sincerely,  
Anakin Skywalker


	4. Note 4 Padme

Anakin,

You must be a very smart little boy to know all the ships from different planets. I know that if I ever had a problem with one of my ships, I would definitely let you know. I'm sure you would know how to fix it in no time.

Naboo is a very beautiful planet. Very green with lots of lakes and rivers. There's one particular spot that I love...it's by waterfalls in a meadow. Maybe someday I'll take you there. I know you would like it.

Let me explain my friends to you. The creature with the long, funny ears is Jar-Jar, he's a Gunjan. He's kind of annoying sometimes, but he means well. He makes me laugh. The other man isn't my father, it's ok that you thought that. He's my friend...and he's a Jedi. I'm a handmaiden for the Queen of Naboo and he and his padawan are helping her right now. I'm sorry I can't tell you any more, I really am. We're here because something is wrong with our ship and we need a part to fix it.

About what you said about the feelings you got, I'm not sure I understand. You're just a little boy and pretty soon, I'm going to have to leave. I know we can keep writing to each other, but I don't know if we'll ever see each other again. I wish it didn't have to be like that. I will miss seeing you and talking to you.

I did like the Siesel cakes. Thank you very much for getting those for us. You didn't have to do that, but you did. That means a lot to me. Thank you again, Anakin. And I hope to hear from you soon.

Padme

P.S. Even if a sandstorm doesn't hit, I would still like to visit you. I'll talk to my friends and we should be there shortly.


	5. Note 5 Anakin

Note 5

Padmé,

I'm glad you agreed to come to my house. How do you like it? What do you think of my mother? I showed you C-3PO…the droid I was talking about. What do you think of him? I named him C-3PO because he made the 3rd member of my family. He knows 6 million forms of communication. I programmed him.

I knew you wouldn't get that feeling I was talking about. No one ever has understood it or known what I was talking about….my mother is the closet one to understand it, but even she doesn't understand it completely. I'm not sure what it is.

How old are you? I know you're older than me. If you're not THAT much older than me….it wouldn't be impossible for us to get married. I know, I know….you're thinking I'm just a silly little boy….but remember this….remember that I won't always be a little boy. Some day I'll get older. We'll see. I hope that you move to Tatooine…because I can't leave because I'm a slave. If you're going to marry me, you have to live on Tatooine.

That man is a good friend of yours? He's a Jedi Knight, I KNEW IT! I saw his laser sword. Only Jedi carry that kind of weapon. I don't think he killed a Jedi because no one can kill a Jedi. I know a little about Jedi because I've heard a lot of deep space pilots talk about them. I know that Jedi have apprentices called Padawans…so his Padawan is on Tatooine too? Where is he? That's so cool! I've always wanted to meet a real Jedi before. You've all come here to free us, haven't you? I've had dreams where Jedi came and freed us. So how did you find out about us? But you came to Tatooine to free us, didn't you? Even if you do have a problem with your ship, I think the reason you came to Tatooine was to set us free.

You know what, I wish I could be a Jedi. I know it'll never happen…because I'm a slave for life, but I still think it would be neat. I've had dreams about being a Jedi, and coming back to free all the rest of the slaves…I've also had another strange dream, but you probably don't care.

As I said before, I have heard of Naboo. I only know of it because of it's famous design of ships. I study ships. I didn't know anything about the planet….just the ships. Your hyperdrive has a problem? Do you need it replaced? You know……the funniest thing happened to me yesterday….I trade for my master, and guess what…I was trading, and the Jawas had a Nabooian hyperdrive unit….it wasn't in workable condition, but I looked it over and knew that I could fix it. I brought it back to Watto's shop, and we have one at the shop. Did you know that? Maybe you can buy it. If I had known you needed it, I would have wanted to keep it to give to you, but I couldn't do that…….because the things I traded it for were not mine…..they belonged to Watto.

You have water on your planet????????? That would be so weird. Water is very expensive on Tatooine…only the REALLY rich have much of it. Plants? We have a couple desert plants on our planet, but not many. They're not very big. Having a lot of plants must be nice……but it would be weird. I think it would be weird if I went somewhere that actually got cold. I've heard of some pilots talking about an ice planet called Hoth. I think they just made it up because that's just weird. An ice planet? I've never seen snow or ice before. Does it even exist?

Lakes? I thought those were just myths!!! You mean you actually have WATER on your planet? Only the rich people have it in their homes. How can there be green fields (meadows)? I asked C-3PO what a meadow was and he told me it was a green field. I've never seen green sand before. What does it look like? I'm sorry…..I can't visit Naboo. I'm not allowed to leave this section of Tatooine because I have this thing inside my body…all slaves do….where if a slave goes a certain distance away from the Master, and the Master can't find them…..the Master presses a button and the person gets blown up.

If you're from Naboo, why are you going to Coruscant?

Watto's my master. I'm his slave and Watto owns me and my mom. If I ever tried to kill Watto he would press that button and kill me. He'd probably kill my mom too. He beats us sometimes when he's not happy with our work. I don't care if he beats me….but it's when he beats my mom that I get angry. He's a better master than my old one…but maybe that's because I don't remember the old one so well…I was only three when our old master lost me because he lost a bet on a podrace…

How did I know Qui-Gon's name? Well he introduced himself as Qui-Gon after I rescued Jar-Jar from Sebulba. Qui-Gon is a funny name.

Thanks for saying I'm smart. I think I am too, and so does my mom.

How did you like dinner?

Good….I'll tell Jira that you liked her cakes. You're welcome for buying them….I thought you guys would enjoy them.

What is a waterfall? I've never heard of it before. I would like it a lot if you would take me to your planet.

I'm a slave. We're not part of the Republic….so I don't know about Republic laws……but Republic laws don't affect us. Well I'm a slave for life and there's nothing I can do about it. You see, Tatooine is not part of the Republic; it belongs to the Maurders. My mom told me that a little while before I was born Tatooine used to be part of the Republic…but the Maurders took an interest in it. They bought it from the Republic….the Republic thought they might as well sell it. They considered the planet useless…and a waste….just because it was a desert planet. The Maurders had other uses for it. They appointed a Hutt named Jabba the Hutt to rule the planet. I've never met him. Anyway, when the Maurders took over, the farmers became very poor. Some of them couldn't afford to keep their farms anymore….and somehow my mom became a slave. She doesn't talk much about it….so I don't know how it happened…but she became a slave. The Maurders introduced slavery and podracing and gambling to Tatooine…..which brought a whole new group of people to the planet. I'm a slave, but I'm still a PERSON. I already told you my name. The reason we have slavery on Tatooine is because it's not a part of the Republic.

Want to see my pod? I'm building one…it's the fastest ever. Do you know what speeders look like? Well pods are kind of like that, except they have these things called power couplings on them, and the pods go very fast. The pods are built by people. I mean someone actually has to make the pods. They're not commercially made. Every once in a while we have races…..where people compete. My master has me race….and I do pretty well….I've never finished a race before, but I almost did. I would have won my last race if it hadn't been for Sebulba. He cheats and tinkers with other people's pods. I don't like cheaters….it's so unfair when Sebulba wins. He bumps into other pods in hopes that they crash and get out of the race so that he can win. I don't like that. Someday, I'm actually going to beat him.

Have you built anything?

If your ship is broken, maybe I can fix it. I can fix anything!

Thanks for telling me about your friends. I like them. Jar-Jar is a little weird, but he's funny. Tell Jar-Jar to be careful. Sebulba could have killed him….or beat him up. Luckily I got there just in time to stop it. He's a Gungan? Where does he come from? I've never seen one before….I've seen most every species in the galaxy….but never a Gungan.

I'm guessing you've never been to Tatooine before? I've lived here all my life. There are a lot of interesting people that come here…but there isn't much to look at. Tatooine is mostly a desert planet…it's nice but I wish I could go to another planet. Tatooine is more interesting than you would think. You have to watch out though…because Tatooine has a lot of lowlifes. There are also Tuskin Raiders, also known as Sandpeople that wander around. Most people are afraid of them…they can kill humans…they've done it before…but that's because humans don't know how to understand them. I rescued a young Sandperson a few days ago…it was hurt and I helped it. I like helping people. Tatooine offers a great chance for that. I've also saved a few banthas lives.

Do you have a father? I don't. My mom says I don't have one……but I know that I do. Maybe he died or something and she just doesn't want to talk about it.

If you can't leave because you don't have money, then you can live here and we can get married. I do hope that you can leave….I don't think you'd like to be stuck here. I know you want to go back and see the rest of your family….and if you're going to rescue us, you have to be able to take us off the planet.

So Qui-Gon is a Jedi!!!!!!!!!! Can I talk to him? Do you think it would bother him if a little 9 year old asked him a bunch of questions about the Jedi and stuff? You're a handmaiden to the Queen of Naboo?????? To a Queen?????? Wow….I would never have guessed that. I've never seen a queen before…or any royalty…unless you count the Hutts.

Maybe, if you wait long enough, I can build you another ship that works.

Hey, I have an idea…if you can't get money for your ship part, maybe I could race for you, and win you the money. There is a big podrace tomorrow, and Watto hasn't entered me. I could get Watto to think that he bought the podrace, and get him to let me pilot it for me, then I could win the money. What do you think of that?

Anakin


	6. Note 6 Padme

Anakin,

I enjoyed visiting you at your house. I really did. I also really like your mother. She was very nice to me and I appreciated that. I can't believe you made C-3PO all by yourself? You are very smart to not only be able to build him, but program him too. That's very impressive for such a little boy.

I'm fourteen. I'm sorry...but I can't understand the feelings that you said you had. It would be really hard for me to stay on Tatooine. I wish I could bring you with me...but I don't want to take you away from your mother. You said that someday you won't be a little boy anymore, but I think it's going to hard for me to think of you as anything but the little boy I knew from Tatooine.

Yes, Qui-Gon is a Jedi Master. His padawan, Obi-Wan, stayed with our ship and he's waiting for us to come back with the part we need. I haven't really talked much with either of them. I'm just not sure what to think of them, I suppose.

You know, Anakin, it could be possible for you to become a Jedi. I mean, with the feelings that you get and the dreams, that sounds like a Jedi to me, at least. Maybe you could talk to Qui-Gon about it and see what he says.

I'm sorry, but we didn't come here to free you. To be completely honest with you, I wasn't even aware that there were slaves here. I just wanted to tell you that so you didn't get your hopes up. I'm really sorry.

About that part you have in your shop now, I don't think we'll be able to buy it because all we have with us are Republican credits, which are worthless here. I have no idea how we'll be able to get that part, Anakin, because I don't want you to race your pod for it. It's too dangerous and I don't want anything to happen to you.

Yes, Naboo is really beautiful. I wish I could take you there to see the waterfalls at the meadow I love. The meadow has lots of green grass and flowers that smell so good. A waterfall happens when water falls down the edge of a cliff. It's really beautiful and peaceful. I love it there. I will definitely take you there someday. I promise.

Padme


	7. Note 7 Anakin

Note 7  
Padmé,

Padmé, you are the most beautiful creature I've ever seen. I would never hurt you, and my mother wouldn't either. I think she likes you. What do you think of her?

How did I program C-3PO? Well, for the languages, I looked for language files all over the place. I copied them and then programmed them all into C-3PO. It wasn't that hard. I just needed to program everything just right. And I've been programming stuff for Watto since I was very little.

That's okay that you don't understand my feelings. My mom doesn't either. Qui-Gon says that not everyone has those feelings.

I hadn't tested my pod before because I just finished it today. Thanks for your help. The boy that helped us is my best friend Kitster. What do you think of him? He and I have been through a lot together, but he's not a slave so I'm not allowed to go and see him…he has to be the one that comes to me. So what do you think of my finished pod?  
It runs. Qui-Gon decided to let me race tomorrow, and I'm glad. I really want to help you and everyone you're with.

You know what…the strangest thing happened just before I went to bed. I got this cut from working on the pod…and Qui-Gon insisted that HE be the one to clean it and not my mother. I thought that was weird. And then as he was cleaning it he pricked me with a needle right on my cut…..that hurt. I asked him what he was doing. You know what he said? He said that he was, "checking for infections." How weird… Why would he want to do that? It was just a tiny cut. My own mother wouldn't even have made such a big deal about it. She wouldn't bother giving me a blood test to check for infections, not even on a big cut. I don't understand why Qui-Gon would have done that. I mean if he's checking for infections he would have to go to the trouble of taking my blood sample down to the medical facility and then have them run a test on it, and THEN come all the way back her. All that for a little cut. I don't understand that. Why would he care if I had any infections anyway?

What kind of food do you have on Naboo?

Okay….I would really like it if you came back and brought me back the grass thing, because I don't know what it is. I still have that feeling…like I'm going to marry you. You have to marry me. It isn't impossible you know. Yes I'm a slave…but you'd have to get used to life on Tatooine, if we're going to marry each other. I can't leave this place since I'm a slave, so please come and move to Tatooine. Otherwise I'll never marry you! I would like it if you would show me grass. It sounds very strange. Thanks for telling me all about it.

Well…if I could got to Naboo with you, then my mom could come too. I may be only a little boy to you right now, and you might think it's hard to imagine me as anything but a little boy…maybe you will always think of me as a little boy…maybe my feelings are wrong about marrying you. 

It's so wizard that Qui-Gon is a Jedi! He let me look at his lightsaber and everything, but he won't let me take it a part. You're so lucky, you got to meet two Jedi. Qui-Gon says that if I get trained I can be a Jedi.

And I AM going to race for you guys. My mom and Qui-Gon said I could. I don't care what you think, because I'm going to anyway.

I'm tired.

I had a weird dream last night, and I couldn't sleep much then. Well I had that weird dream again…only this time I was that boy…and that guy with the mask kept calling me Luke for some strange reason. That's my middle name, but I don't think I was the boy. I don't know…have you ever gotten dreams where you're someone…but you're not that person?

If you're the queen's handmaiden, do you get to see your parents very often? I hope you do. I live with my mom, and see her everyday. I'm glad.

Do you have any best friends? I have a best friend named Kitster. You met him today. He's the only friend my age that is nice to me all the time. Some of my other friends are nice to me sometimes, and mean to me other times. He's the one that stayed while everyone else went off to play ball.

So what did you think of my podracer? Thanks again for helping me put the finishing touches on my pod. Qui-Gon helped too…he's been staring at me a lot lately.

I wish I could go to Naboo too. What is green grass…your name for green sand?? And what are flowers? Are flowers a cactus? I've never heard of them called that. Waterfalls sound like what we call rain on Tatooine. We don't get much rain, but it's when water falls on the ground. We don't have any cliffs around here, so I guess that's why I've never heard of a waterfall before.  Okay, remember you promised…you promised to take me to Naboo someday.

Well it's almost my bedtime. My mom's going to be calling me to go to bed pretty soon…

Bye.

Anakin


	8. Note 8 Padme

Anakin,

Thank you, Anakin, you don't know what that means to me. And I do really like your mother. She's a very nice woman and I would like to get to know her better.

I still can't believe that you built and programmed C-3PO all by yourself. I'm amazed at all of the things you can do and especially with your abilities. I really think that you could be a Jedi if you wanted to be. I've always believed that if you set your mind to it, you can do anything.

You're welcome for helping with your pod. I enjoyed seeing it and helping you with it. I still wish there was some other way for us to get that part. But if Qui-Gon says that's it's ok for you to do it, then I just have to trust him. If anything happens to you Ani, I don't know what I would do...please be careful. Please.

I don't know why Qui-Gon would take blood from you like that. I don't know very much about the Jedi and their ways, so you guess is as good as mine. But I'm sure he meant you no harm by doing that. I'm sure he had a perfectly good reason for it.

Anakin...you have to realize that chances are good we won't marry each other. I'm going to be leaving soon and I don't know if I'll ever get to visit Tatooine again. The only way I can think of to see you again is if you did become a Jedi. But if you do become a Jedi, you need to do it for yourself, not for me or anyone else.

I don't know what to tell you about your dream. I've never had a dream like that. Maybe you just ask Qui-Gon about it.

I do have a best friend. Her name is Sabe and she's a handmaiden too. We go everywhere together. I hope that one day you'll get to meet her. I promise you that one day, you'll come to Naboo and visit me. Grass is much different than sand. It's soft and...I don't know how else to describe. You need to feel it for yourself and one day, you will.

Padme


	9. Note 9 Anakin

Note 9

Padmé,

What is grass? I've never heard of it before. Mom said it has blades. Does it cut your feet? I've never seen grass before because I've lived here all my life. How could you think blades of grass are soft? Wouldn't that cut you? Maybe I would enjoy it, but blades of grass don't sound very good.

What kind of food do you have on your planet? You said you're not used to my kind. I was glad that you came over and ate with us. We don't eat with people very often. Sometimes Kitster comes over, but only rarely. Watto doesn't like to have nonslaves staying with us, and I'm not allowed to go out of a certain range….unless Watto gives me permission. Kitster lives too far away from me.

I do love my mother; I love her very, very much. I believe she is the best mother in the galaxy. What are your parents like? Do you think they would like me? My mom likes you.

Why is everyone so amazed that I built the pod? Did everyone think I wasn't smart enough to build it or something? So you do like my pod? That makes me happy. Remember that it's going to win you your money so that you can leave…even though I don't want you to go.

Qui-Gon's weird. It's not the fact that he cleaned my cut that makes me think he's weird; it's the fact that he gave me a blood test to check for infections I don't understand why he went to all the trouble to check for infections. He said it was to check to make sure that nothing got passed my defenses…but…but I don't get sick THAT often. I just got over being sick from a lung infection, but I'm okay. Honest. The only thing that makes me sick usually is asthma.

I had another strange dream last night…I get them sometimes. I had this really strange dream where I saw this weird room with two people in it…..I guess they were both Jedi, but one was bad….I didn't know Jedi could be bad….but this one was….he had like a red lightsaber and was wearing all black. He was wearing a suit and a mask and you could hear his breathing. I don't know if he was human or not….and then there was this other Jedi that was about 18, 19, or 20…or somewhere around there…and he had a blue lightsaber. They started fighting. I've had this dream several times…….but I never finish it. As soon as they start fighting the dream goes away. I want to know who those two people are. It was a really strange dream.

Are there Jedi with red lightsabers? I've heard of pilots talk about different colors, but never red. Are there such things as evil Jedi? I thought Jedi were good. But Qui-Gon did tell me that there were some Dark Jedi or something. I don't understand.

I don't think my dream means anything. Dreams don't have to mean anything do they? When I was really little I kept on having this dream about this really evil guy with yellow eyes and wrinkly skin. He was really ugly, and he kept on chasing me in my dreams. He used to throw electricity out of his fingers, and he had this really evil laugh. I used to get SO scared of that…I would wake up screaming. My mom tried to calm me down and tell me that there was no one out there that looked like that….no one was after me. I stopped having those dreams after a while, but even for a couple years after that, I had this fear of old men. I'm sure this evil Jedi dream will eventually go away. Now I look back on the old man dream, and almost laugh. How could I have been so scared of something like that? No one has yellow eyes, or has skin like that….and NO One CAN shoot electricity from their fingers. No old man would be after me. I'm only a little boy who's a slave.

I don't want to bother Qui-Gon with my dream. It's probably some silly nightmare. But guess what, Qui-Gon said that with training I could be a Jedi!

Why can't a Queen's handmaiden have a slave husband that lives on Tatooine….and why can't you live part time on Tatooine? What's wrong with that? I don't care what the chances are. Somehow I will find a way of getting you to marry me. I…I've always wanted to be a Jedi! It's been my dream. Maybe…maybe Qui-Gon can somehow train me to be a Jedi, and then I can find a way of escaping slavery, and then I could see you all the time, and then we could get married.

Oh, so you have a best friend too, and her name is Sabe? That's really cool. She's a handmaiden too? You do everything together with her? I do everything with Kitster. Maybe she could marry Kitster.

Maybe I can get Watto to let me visit you on Naboo sometime.

Well the race will be starting in 5 minutes, so I'll see you at the end of the race. Sebulba just threatened me….and the flag ceremony just took place. I think Qui-Gon wants to talk to me….hang on.

Will you please watch for me? I'm going to win the race and make you proud…..and get you your money so that you can go on your way.

I'll do as well as I can. As long as Sebulba doesn't cheat, I should be able to win the race for you. My mom never likes it when I race. She always gets scared because podracing is dangerous. Watto makes me do it, and she doesn't like it. I love it! I've raced before, so you're not putting me in any more danger than I'd be in if I were racing for Watto. This time I especially want to win because I want you to go to Coruscant. I want to help you.

Oh….if I do win the race, and the Queen and Qui-Gon's Padawan are outside of town, I won't be able to see Obi-Wan or the Queen. Maybe you can have them come to my house before you leave? You sound like my mom. Yes, I promise that I'll be careful. I don't think anything's going to happen to me because I've raced before.

Oh I'm tired. I stayed up and made something for you, but it's a surprise, so I can't tell you what it is.

Anakin


	10. Note 10 Padme

Anakin,

Grass is very soft and now that I think of it, very difficult to describe to anyone who hasn't seen it before. I guess I've just never met anyone who's never seen grass before. I promise you, Anakin, somehow, someday, you will visit me on Naboo.

I don't live with my parents. I have never met them, but I live with a man named Dalben. He's very kind. I know that he would easily welcome you or anyone else for that matter into our home. Maybe you'll meet him someday.

I think people are so amazed that you built your pod yourself not because we think you're not smart enough, but because you are only nine years old. I would have expected someone much older to be able to do what you do, not someone your age. It's a compliment, Anakin. Don't think of it any other way.

Don't worry about Qui-Gon. I really don't know what his plans are for you or the Queen. I wish I knew, I would certainly be less stressed if I did. But I also think that his plans are in his best intentions. If he does plan on training you as a Jedi, I'm sure that he will. As for his reasoning for taking your blood sample, I still don't have an answer for you. I really don't know that much about the Jedi or their ways, you'll just have to ask him I guess.

Dreams are hard to interpret. I think interpretations of dreams vary for person to person. But, you seem to have some knowledge of the Force, in my opinion, and that could mean that your dreams actually do have some meaning. What that is though, is hard to say. Have you asked Qui-Gon about them? I'm sure he would be happy to help you.

Anakin, I've already told you, it's next to impossible for us to be able to get married, or even know each other after I leave here. I do wish there was some way for us to see each other after all this is over. But, it will probably never happen. Don't get your hopes up, Anakin. I don't mean to sound that way, but honestly, you're only building yourself up for a disappointment.

Good luck with your race. Of course I'll watch for you. I'm going to be standing next to your mother. Please be careful and please be safe. Don't get yourself killed just so you can get us out of here.

Padme


	11. Note 11 Anakin

Note 11

Padmé,

I DID IT! I won the race! I already gave Qui-Gon the winnings, so now you can have enough money to buy that hyperdrive unit. You can leave here and…well go to Coruscant, and do whatever your important mission is. Take down those greedy stupid heads. I'm very glad that I could help you out. It's not often that I get to help a beautiful handmaiden to a Queen. I hope you'll never forget me. I'm going to be so sad once you leave. I really do like you, and I'll never stop thinking of you; I promise.

That race was so fun, and it was made all the more fun because I got to win the race for you. Sebulba tried to kill me a couple of times, but I outsmarted him. What did you think about my little trick on him? The one where he pushed me onto the service ramp and he thought he had me, but I went up over him and overtook him. Sebulba is mean, and I don't like him. He doesn't care about the people he hurts, and he cheats! I don't like cheaters. I think I showed Sebulba a thing or two, don't you think? Everyone should know better than to mess with me.

Even though Qui-Gon is strange, he's really nice. Just before the race he said the strangest thing to me, "Concentrate on the moment. Feel, don't think. May the Force be with you." He said something like that…..and I tried to do what he said, but that's what I normally do anyway, but I tried harder, and I think what he said really helped me.

Qui-Gon did tell me that I can use this Force thingy, and that all I would need to be a Jedi is training. Can you believe that? I asked Qui-Gon about the dream thing…but he hasn't replied yet. I don't even know where he is right now. He said he had to go do something, but he's been gone a long time.

Qui-Gon's given me a lot of attention. Why should Qui-Gon care about me anyway? I'm just a slave and he's a Jedi, plus I'm only a kid and he's….kind of old. He told me he was 60.

I'm glad you think I'm a friend. I consider you a friend too. I know you're 5 years older than me, but why does that matter so much? I know it seems like a lot right now, but I've heard of people who were 30 years apart in age, and they still got married. Does a 25 and 30 year old seem like there's a great difference in age? Or a 90 and 95 year old? Well since you're leaving and I'll probably never see you again, plus you'll never want to marry someone 5 years younger than you, I guess I should forget it, huh?

Wow!!!!!! I can't believe it!!!!! The race is over!!!! I won!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm a little sad now because now you'll have to leave. I'll miss you. I'm on my way back home to tell mom. I was really glad that I had the pleasure of meeting you. Before you go, please come back with Obi-Wan and the Queen….and I have that something to give you.

Well I have to get going. Qui-Gon is helping me sell my pod, and I can give the money to help my mother. I think he's going to stop back at the house with me in order to give the money to my mother.

Good-bye, Padmé. I know I'll never see you again. :(

Anakin


	12. Note 12 Padme

Anakin,

I can't believe you won, well, I can believe it...I'm just so happy for you! I've never seen anything like it before and the way you out-manuevered Seluba...it was very exciting to watch. I have to admit that I was really worried about you the entire time. But I had to watch, I needed to know what was going to happen to you. I couldn't stand to see you get hurt. I'm so glad that nothing bad happened to you.

We'll probably be leaving within the next few days. I'm sure I'll find some way to say goodbye to you. Don't worry, I'm sure we'll see each other again some day...after all, I did promise to take you to that meadow on Naboo some day. You just never know what the future is going to hold and even though I know you don't believe it, you might not be a slave forever.

I know you still think that you're going to marry me, but like I said, you don't know what the future is going to hold. It's better to just take every day as it comes. The next few years for me are going to be very busy and I'm sure that your pod-racing career will take off, even if you don't have a pod anymore. And even if that doesn't happen, I know you'll find some way to get off of Tatooine. You're smart, Anakin. And you can take care of yourself. There's no doubt in my mind that you'll figure something out.

I'm really going to miss talking to you. And I'm going to really miss seeing you. I consider you a good friend, not only for everything you've done for us, but because I feel like I can really talk to you. I'll never forget you, Anakin. Thank you for everything you've done.

Padme


	13. Note 13 Anakin

Note 13

Padmé,

You'll never guess what just happened!! I'm free now! While I was getting ready for the race, Qui-Gon went over to Watto and talked to him without my knowing. During the conversation, Qui-Gon made a bet with Watto that if I won, I'd be free. I cannot believe this! I'm actually free now! And guess what else! I get to become a Jedi too! Qui-Gon said I get to come back with you and everyone else when you go to Coruscant…so that I can go to the Jedi Temple and get my training started. This is unbelievable. The only bad thing is my mom can't come with us. Qui-Gon said that Watto wouldn't free my mother. She's not free and I'll probably never see her again. I'm really going to miss her, and part of me doesn't want to go. I don't want to leave her here all alone, yet I really want to leave and become a Jedi. My mother said that I have to be the one to choose…and I chose to leave. I know she was happy for me, but that she also was sad that I had left her. I feel really bad about it. Right before I left home, she hugged me and kissed me and told me that we would see each other again. I made a promise to her that I would come back and free her someday.

I know that Qui-Gon wants me to be a Jedi because my mother asked him if I was to become a Jedi. Qui-Gon said, "Yes, our meeting was not a coincidence. Nothing happens by accident." I wonder how my mother knew that Qui-Gon wanted me to become a Jedi.

Did the hyperdrive unit get installed yet? I hope not because I would like to help. Are you having trouble with it? If so, let me do it. I know I could install it correctly.

Another thing that I'm happy about, besides me being freed and getting to become a Jedi, is I get to be with you longer. I don't have to say good-bye to you yet! I made something for you, but it's a surprise. I'll give it to you once we get on the ship.

Yes, Sebulba is MEAN. He picks on everyone and thinks he can control all the pod races. He's kind of the big guy around here…the one everyone looks up to and no one wants to mess with. He's killed people if they caused a problem with him, and he messes other people's pods up so that he can win. I wonder what it would be like to be that kind of person. I don't think it would be very fun. Sebulba holds grudges against people, so he might still try to come at me even though I've beaten him. I made him look stupid in front of everyone by winning the race; I don't think he's going to be too happy about that. I'm leaving the planet though, so I hope I never see him again. Maybe I'll squash him if I come back to see my mother…that would be kind of fun.

Thanks. I'm really glad that you enjoyed the podrace.

I wonder how Qui-Gon knew that I would be able to use the Force. He said I had Jedi reflexes, but I don't get the whole Force thing.

I was a slave all my life up until just a few minutes ago. I was born a slave. I've been Watto's slave ever since I was really little….3 I think. Our old master was a Hutt and lost us to Watto betting on a pod race. All my life I've always wanted to be something and to do something exciting. When I heard about the Jedi Knights, that's all I ever wanted to be. I had lots of dreams about being a Jedi, but everyone told me I could never become a Jedi because I was a slave…and only special people could become Jedi….and I wasn't born in the Republic. So that dream changed to just wanting to meet a Jedi, and having them free all of the slaves. I have also wanted to be a pilot for as far back as I can remember. Watto started me racing a couple of years ago, and before that I went through this training process….and Watto had me pilot landspeeders. I've never been in a spaceship before. I'm sure I would love flying a ship. I swear I'm going to be a pilot someday. I always wanted to learn to fly so that I could fly far away from Tatooine and NEVER return. I hate Tatooine!

I know, I know…..it's just that some adults, most adults, ignore children….and most people look at slaves as something less than human. If I feel that I can stand up to someone, and that I deserve respect from someone, I will tell them I'm a person….but if I know that the other person is uncaring and mean….I know I'm just a slave to them.

Well okay, so we'll never be able to get married because of the age gap…but I still like you a lot. I'll try to get the marriage idea out of my head and not ever mention it to you ever again, all right?

Well I'm almost to your ship now, so I'll see you soon. Qui-Gon and I are on our way back now. Talk to you later.

I'm back.

What's your mother like? How many people live in your family? What are the other people in your family like?

I still miss my mother. How am I going to go through each day without her? I've never been away from my mother for any length of time…not even one day. I'm also very worried about her. I didn't like to leave her as a slave. I wish I could have made Qui-Gon free her. I'm so scared…..I've never been on my own before, and I don't know what will happen to my mother. What if she just said we'd see each other again to make me feel better at that moment? What if she dies and I never find out? What if she gets sick or injured and I never know?

Do you ever miss your mother when you're away?

As soon as I become a Jedi, I'm going to go back to Tatooine to free my mother! I'm just scared that she might get sold or something might happen to her while I'm gone…I feel so helpless towards her right now. I might just be a little boy, but I've defended her before when these two guys came to raid our house. They were going to beat her up…maybe kill her…but I was able to kind of sense the danger and I threw metal scraps at them, and I never saw them around our house ever again! I also yelled at them and told them I would kill them if they ever messed with us again. It was so funny! I used this little electrical thing that I built to record my voice and make me sound like I was a grown up and that I was REALLY MEAN. I guess that sure scared them off!

What are your hopes and dreams?

Yes, I did talk to my mother about wanting to become a Jedi Knight before, but she said it wasn't possible….that no one would ever consider me to be a Jedi…so how did she know that Qui-Gon would take me on? Maybe that's what Qui-Gon told her earlier. That would be just like her to hide that from me! She loves to give me surprises.

That stunk that you already had the hyperdrive installed by the time we got back to the ship! I was hoping to help with that….oh well.

I hope that I get to build my own lightsaber. I don't want ANYONE doing that for me!

I'm sorry for bringing up the marriage thing. I just couldn't help it…but it was stupid of me to do that. I should have known you would only be interested in boys your own age, and that you probably already liked someone. You probably already have a boyfriend.

I wonder what that THING was that was fighting with Qui-Gon. Qui-Gon told me that he thinks I dreamed about Sith…that they really shoot electricity out of their fingers, and that the Dark Side can make people look ugly sometimes, and that Sith have red lightsabers. Maybe that THING was a Sith. I'm scared. Did you get a good look at it? It's body was all black and red, and it had a red lightsaber. I've never seen a red lightsaber before, except in my dreams. Have you?

Anyway, Qui-Gon and I were coming back from Watto's shop. See, Watto had to deactivate my slave device so that I wouldn't be blown up…and as we were heading back, we saw this weird black ball. Qui-Gon said it was some kind of probe droid…and he had the feeling that we were in danger so we started running. I don't like running that much, but I did what he said. I couldn't keep up with Qui-Gon though, and I had to stop for a couple of minutes. See, I have asthma, but it's not too bad….it's not bad, but it's not real slight either…..kind of in the middle of being bad and being slight. At any rate, when I stopped, Qui-Gon turned and looked back at me and noticed that THING. He told me to drop, and I did. Then that THING took out it's lightsaber and started fighting with Qui-Gon. I ran back to the ship and you know how the ship flew low and Qui-Gon was able to jump on the ramp and get away.

That's when Qui-Gon introduced me to this other Jedi named Obi-Wan Kenobi. He was a lot younger than Qui-Gon, but he also looked like he was a lot older than you. I guessed he might be in his middle twenties. Do you know him? He has this weird looking braid and really short hair.

I'm getting tired now.

Jar-Jar told me that you have fish on your planet. I've never heard of a fish before. We have a few desert birds here on Tatooine. On Tatooine, most of the people that aren't slaves are farmers.

Anyway, I asked Jar-Jar what a fish is…and you know what he told me? He said it was an animal that lives in the water…under the water. That's so weird. How could an animal live in water? We don't have much water on Tatooine……and there isn't enough of it for an animal to live in it. That would be weird. And then Jar-Jar told me it doesn't have eyelids and it's covered in scales, and doesn't have arms or legs. Ew…..it doesn't have eyelids and it's covered in scales? That sounds gross. It doesn't have arms or legs. Yuck.

I don't think I want to eat one. I don't want to eat scales. The thought of it makes me want to throw up….no offense to you.

I want to come to Naboo!!!!! I want to see what your planet is like! I've never been on another planet before!!!!!

Well I get to see more of you! And I have that something for you. I'll give it to you sometime on the trip over. …going to try to sleep again….

I'm back. I STILL couldn't sleep…still too cold…but you came over to me with your blanket and put it around me. What did you think of the thing I made for you? I wanted to give it to you so that you would have something to remember me by. Thanks for giving me that blanket and for comforting me.

Why do you look so sad? What's wrong? I know you're awake because I am too. I couldn't sleep because of how cold I am, and because I kept on thinking of my mother.

Sigh…today seems like such a long time. I'm very tired, but I'm too cold to sleep; I can't sleep when I'm cold…no matter how tired I am. Are you like that too? Is that why you're awake? But something seems like it's wrong, Padmé.

Qui-Gon is going to let me come with you to Coruscant…and he says he's going to try to have me become a Jedi! He thinks I can be a Jedi! I want to be one so badly! You have no idea!!!!!

I made a promise to mom that I would free her someday. I never break promises. I'm going to come back to Tatooine and free the rest of the slaves…..once I'm a Jedi.

I haven't met your friend Sabe yet. Can I meet her soon? You said that she's your best friend. What do you think she'll think of me?

Yes, pod racing is dangerous….a lot of people die or get seriously injured. But I have this little feeling that kind of helps me be a defensive pilot….I can kind of sense when I'm getting close to something…..when I'm about to hit something. I can predict what could happen. It's really weird. It's probably this Force thing Qui-Gon told me about. At first I thought everyone had it, but I guess they don't. Kitster says he doesn't have that feeling. Do you?

I'm glad that you feel you can really talk to me…I feel like that too…about you.

You're welcome for everything.

Your friend,

Anakin


	14. Note 14 Padme

Anakin,

I'm really happy for you. You finally get to leave Tatooine. I just wish that there was some way we could bring your mother with you. I suppose some things just don't work out the way you want them too.

So you're going to be trained as a Jedi? Well, that means you'll get to go to Coruscant with me because the Jedi Temple is there. Hopefully, everything will go well and we'll both achieve what we're hoping to at Coruscant. I am glad that I'll get to see you more, though. But I'm especially glad that you don't have to be a slave anymore. You deserve it, especially after everything that you've done for us.

My parents...my mother...I really don't know them. I live with a man on Naboo. He's very nice and he's practically raised me. But I miss my real family, even though I hardly ever knew them. I don't really like to talk about that. I don't know why I'm telling you this. I've never really told anyone before.

Anyways, I hope you'll get to meet Sabe too. I'm sure you'll see her on the ship. She looks a little like me. All the handmaidens look like they could be sisters because sometimes we have to be decoys for the queen whenever she's in danger.

I'm sad because my people are dying. You see, our planet has been invaded, so many have died. It's horrible. That's why I'm going to Coruscant. The queen has to speak before the Senate to ask them for more help. I can't stop thinking about it.

I'm glad the blanket helped you. Space is very cold and I don't like it much either.

Yes, I would like it if you came to visit my on Naboo. I know you'll like it. My planet is the most beautiful planet in the galaxy. I know that someday you'll come to visit me, especially if you become a Jedi. Then we'll see each other again for sure. I don't know when, but I'm sure it will happen.

I really liked the present you made for me. It's beautiful. It must have taken you a really long time to make it. Thank you. I'll treasure it always.

Padme


	15. Note 15 Anakin

Note 15

Padmé,

But I've lived with my mother ALL my life, and I'm younger than you are. You were never a slave, and you don't have to worry about whether you'll ever see the person that takes care of you again. I don't even know if my mother will be alive the next time I go to Tatooine, or if I'll ever see her again. You don't have to worry about that. Mine was just me, my mom, and C-3PO. You don't know what being a slave is like, and besides that, I was the only person that lived with my mom. She'll be lonely, and she'll have to go through being a slave all by herself. I feel bad about leaving her.

You don't know your mother or your parents or your family? Maybe you'll get to meet them someday. Thank you for telling me the truth about your family and who has raised you. I promise I won't tell anyone.

How does the government on Naboo work? What do handmaidens do? Do you help the Queen rule the planet, or what? Or do you just help the people?

I want you to be right about me saving and rescuing my mother and that I get to work on mechanical things and make my own lightsaber. I want it to be a blue lightsaber because that's my favorite color. What's your favorite color?

I'm glad you like the necklace. Don't lose it, okay? I don't want you to forget about me (even though you said you didn't need it to remember me by.). I know you'll forget about me because I'm a little kid. That's how all teenagers think…they forget about little kids that they meet. But I want to think you're better than that. Promise me you won't forget me. Don't even forget me when you're grown up and married or after you have kids and living on Naboo, don't forget about me, okay? I want to know that you remember me when you're 90.

You don't have a boyfriend? How come? Guys your age must be blind and stupid if they don't think you're beautiful.

As soon as I saw Obi-Wan I saw his lightsaber, and I knew he was a Jedi. So Obi-Wan Kenobi is Qui-Gon's apprentice? Cool. Obi-Wan has a weird haircut. I'm scared of Queen Amidala. Do you think she likes little kids? I'm scared of important people because I heard that most of them are mean and snotty and don't like little kids.

I asked Qui-Gon about the Jedi Temple. He told me that I couldn't go there right now because only Jedi are allowed, and he said he has to talk to the Council first. He said he'll pick me up when he's ready, and that I have to go with everyone else to the Senate building right now. That's why I went with you and everyone else to the Senate Building.

When we landed on Coruscant, I thought it was beautiful. I've never seen so many buildings, and Coruscant is awesome! I hope I get to live here someday. It's MUCH better than Tatooine. I'm glad we made it to Coruscant. I've never been on another planet……so I made me all the more excited!!!!!!!! All those lights and buildings!!!!!!!!!!! It's so pretty.

Again, thank you for giving me the blanket when we were back on the ship. I couldn't sleep because I was so cold. After you gave me the blanket I was warm enough that I could fall asleep. I like warm places, but I guess that's because I'm used to it. Do you want the blanket back now?

So you are sad because stupid people invaded your planet and are killing people. That's not fair! Isn't there something that you can do? I hope the Queen gets to talk to the Senate. They'll have to believe her, and then everything will be okay.

Oh my asthma is no big deal. It's not too bad, and I've had it all my life. Don't worry about it.

By the way, I've been looking for you, but I don't know where you are. Now that we've landed….Qui-Gon had that Sabe friend of yours baby-sit me. I don't think she likes me that well. I don't know what's going on, but I wish I could talk to you right now. You disappeared on me. You said that sometimes you get to protect the Queen. That would be neat…

Who were those men that came out to meet us on the landing platform? I didn't like one of them…..I'm not sure why, but he kind of scares me. I don't know. You probably think I'm crazy. For some reason, the one guy reminds me of that evil old man in my dreams…..which really scares me. Padme, I'm scared. Will you protect me? I don't like not knowing who people are.

What are you doing right now?

I don't think it's fair that I have to be baby-sat right now. I want to look around the palace, but no one will let me. I have to stay in this boring room. I wonder when I get to see the Jedi Council. Qui-Gon told me I would get to see them. I hate waiting around.

I REALLY want to see the Jedi! I hope they like me. Do you think they will (the Council?) I've ALWAYS dreamed of becoming a Jedi Knight, and the wait is killing me. Can you talk to me, please? I tried looking for you earlier, but you weren't there. Queen Amidala told me that she sent you on an errand, but you'll be back. Will you talk to me when you get back? Please?

Can we explore this building together? I really want to see it. Maybe if you come with me people will let me walk around. You're big, so maybe they'll let me.

You said that you wanted to achieve something on Coruscant. What do you want to achieve? I want to become a Jedi, and…you…I don't know. Tell me, please.

When can I visit you on Naboo? And if I do, can you show me what a fish is…the thing Jar-Jar told me about?

Anakin


	16. Note 16 Padme

Anakin,

I'm sorry if I sounded insensitive before. You're right, there's no way I could know how you feel. I've never had to leave anyone behind the way you have. I'm really sorry that this had happened to you. I wish there was something I could do to help you. If there's anything that I can do, please, let me know. On the bright side, at least you knew your mother and you'll have memories of her. I never knew mine. I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

Naboo's government is similar to a lot of government's in the Republic. We have a Queen that the people elect and then appointed Senators who represent Naboo in the Senate. The handmaidens usually act as decoys, since they all look a lot like the Queen. So if the Queen is going somewhere that she might be in danger, then a handmaiden takes her place.

Don't worry, Anakin. I won't forget you. There's something about you, I don't know what, but I don't think I'll ever forget you. I promise you. Even when I'm married and have children on Naboo, I'll remember you.

I'm not sure why I don't have a boyfriend. I guess I don't have a lot of time for one. I'm busy all the time, so it would be hard to keep a relationship going. I'm only fourteen though. Maybe in a few years, I'll think a little differently.

And don't worry about the Queen. She's really not that scary or mean or snotty, at least I think she's not. She does like little kids, though. I know that for sure.

I'm going with the Queen in the Senate. She has to make a speech to try to get the Senate to help my people. If it doesn't work, I don't know what will happen to them. It's very important. Because of this, I don't know how much I'm going to get to see you while you're on Coruscant. I would like to show you the planet, but unfortunately, I have duties that need to be done. If I don't get to see you before either of us leave, just know that I wish you the best in life. I hope that everything goes well with the Council (even though I've no doubt that it will). Please try not to worry so much about your mother. I told her I would watch out for you and I've told her that you're doing good so she won't worry about you. She really loves you, Anakin. Don't worry about her. I think she'll be ok.

Padme


	17. Note 17 Anakin

Note 17

Padme,

Oh okay….I guess fish doesn't sound that bad. I was talking to Sabe and she said that some people have fish as pets. I would like one. Where can I get one?

I wish you could have come to see me last night!!!  I was bored. I really like to explore new and big places, but I couldn't because I didn't have a big person with me.

Okay…..I don't know which was Chancellor Valorum and which was Senator Palpatine……but something bothered me about one of them. I'm not sure what it was…but like I said before, it was kind of like my dream. I don't like whichever one it was. Thanks for being there to protect me. That man is scary!!!!

Has the queen talked to the Senate yet? What happened in there? I wasn't allowed in.

Well….I went before the Jedi Council…..I'm not sure what they thought of me. They gave me this test where I was supposed to tell them what was on this screen, but it wasn't facing me…….so I don't know if I was right or not. It seemed REALLY easy, but I don't know…maybe I didn't pass it. They didn't say anything about whether I passed or not. They asked me all these questions and made a big deal about the fact that I was scared about my mother….and scared about that man. I didn't tell them I was scared of the man, because that would have sounded really dumb. Then they said that they wouldn't train me. I don't think anyone in the Jedi Council actually liked me. They kept giving me dirty looks. That made me really MAD!. Why won't they let me become a Jedi? It's not fair!!!!!!! Qui-Gon tried to take me on as an apprentice, but they wouldn't let him do it. I don't think they're ever going to let me become a Jedi. It's what I've always dreamed of doing. What's wrong with me that they won't let me become a Jedi. Maybe it has something to do with this midi-cholorian thing. Maybe I don't have enough of them or something. Qui-Gon seems to think I'd be a good Jedi, but everyone was against him….even Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan doesn't like me…and I can tell. No one likes me except my mother, you, and Qui-Gon. There was this funny green troll that talked a lot. He didn't like me at all. He was really mean, and he said a lot of bad things about me, and then more Council members agreed. I just want to go up to that green troll and pull his ears. He talks really funny too. I don't know who he is, except that he's one of the Jedi Council members. I bet I could beat that little troll up. He's so little. He's even shorter than I am.

Well at any rate, I hope I can see you soon. I don't know what's going to happen to me because the Council won't let me become a Jedi, and I have no where else to go or live. What will become of me?????

There is something you could do for me that would make me feel better. You could come visit me…and explore with me. Please?

I'm sorry you don't have memories of your mother. Maybe you can get to meet her some day. I hope you do.

Okay, thanks for telling me about Naboo's government. Maybe someday you can be Queen, and not just a handmaiden. I think you would make a good Queen…or maybe you could be a Senator.

I hope you don't forget me. Remember…you promised. Okay…when you're married and have children, you'll have to let me visit you sometime. I want to see what you look like when you're older.

Well I'm glad you don't have a boyfriend right now. I want you to stay single for me, okay, until I'm old enough to be your boyfriend, and then we can be boyfriend and girlfriend.

Okay…okay….I still haven't gotten a chance to talk to the Queen yet. Maybe I can…later, but she's probably busy right now. I hope you're right…that she likes little kids.

You're going with the Queen in the Senate? They're going to let you???? That's so awesome. They wouldn't let me in…but they let you in. Tell me what happened, okay. I'm sure the Senate session is over by now. It was a long time ago that I tried entering the Senate session. Did the Queen's speech work?

Okay…okay…well even if you're busy with the Queen…you can make time to see me, can't you? You know where I am. Sabe is babysitting me when I'm not with the Jedi, and she's a handmaiden too. If she is a handmaiden and has time to baby-sit me, maybe you have enough time to come and see me while I'm on Coruscant.

Thanks for talking with my mom. She needs someone like you to talk with to make her feel better. I know my mom loves me, and I love her too.

I have to go….I think Sabe's going to check to make sure I'm in bed. Don't tell her I was up late. I just pretend to sleep when she checks. I can't sleep, though….because of the stupid Jedi Council and everything.

Anakin


	18. Note 18 Padme

Anakin,

I'm sorry I haven't had a chance to visit you. I've been very busy with the Senate meetings. They're very long and most of them are boring too but I have to be there. Since you asked about it, I'll tell you some important things that have happened. The Queen spoke to the Senate to ask for their help so my planet can have some peace but they didn't agree to giving us help. Then the Queen called for a no confidence vote on Chancellor Valorum. This means that the Chancellor is going to be replaced with a new one. A vote of no confidence doesn't happen very often and it was a very big decision for the Queen to make but she felt it was necessary to help Naboo.

I'm sorry things didn't go as well as you hoped with the Council. Maybe they just wanted to meet you and then talked about you together after you left. I know it seems like they might have been talking about you behind your back, but I don't think they could have made a decision with you right in the room. I'm sure permitting a new apprentice to the Order is a big decision. They might just need time to think about it. I hope that everything works out for you though. I know how much you want to be a Jedi and I think you could get a great one if given the opportunity.

I know you want to talk to the Queen but you have to remember that she's even busier than I am because she's actually the Queen. I'm sure she will be happy to meet you as soon as she has a chance. But because we're so busy, I don't know when I'll be able to see you. I would definitely like to before I have to go back to Naboo but I don't know if I will be able to.

I'll make sure to tell your mom what's going on with you. And don't worry, I won't tell Sabe you were up late, ok?

Padme


	19. Note 19 Anakin

Note 19

Padmé,

I'll never forget you as long as I live. You're my friend right now.

I know what really happened in the Senate, even though you didn't tell me. I heard from one of the other handmaidens (again I tried to find you but couldn't), and they said that the Senate would not listen to the Queen. AHHHHHHHH! The Senate wouldn't believe the queen? That's not right. You should have had her get me. I would have told the Senate a thing or two….and I would have made them listen. That makes me mad that they wouldn't listen to her. I get REALLY angry when I see injustices, and I'm never afraid to speak my mind. If you ever get in a situation like that, get me. I'll take them down. When things aren't fair…….oh…….that just makes me so mad.

You made it sound like the Senate just didn't agree to give your planet help. It was MUCH worse than that, but you didn't tell me. 

You said the old Supreme Chancellor will be replaced by a new one. I hope it's a nice one who helps your planet. Maybe it could be Palpatine. I met him. I'll tell you more about that later. I hope the Queen made the right decision.

No, the Council said I couldn't be trained. They even told Qui-Gon that! They wouldn't lie to him. They won't let me…they made a decision…no.  (cries)

I found out the name of that little nasty looking troll guy that didn't like me. I asked Qui-Gon, and he told me that that guy's name is Yoda (he also told me himself), and that he is a leading member of the Jedi Council. I guess I better not pick a fight with him, but…….he won't let me become a Jedi!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't think that's fair, and it's really making me mad. I'm really mad about that, and about the Senate not believing your Queen. I feel like punching someone right now. Yes, Yoda is really that short. It at least satisfies me to know that I could beat him up if I wanted to. He has these annoying pointed ears that I just want to yank. I had a dream about beating him up. I woke up laughing. I don't care if that's not very nice. He's not being very nice to me by not letting me become a Jedi. I know they could tell how badly I wanted to be a Jedi. It looks like I never will.

If I never become a Jedi….I'll never be able to rescue my mother. At least if I were a Jedi, I could beat Watto up and force him to let all the slaves go. That would be fun.

I can tell that the situation in the Senate is worrying you. I don't like seeing you sad, and I don't like what happened to Naboo. Something should be done.

You know what happened that was really surprising? Senator Palpatine, who I was scared of before (it was him that I didn't like before), came up to me and started talking to me while I was crying. (I sat down and cried for half an hour after the Jedi Council rejected me.) This is what happened:

I went and sat in the hallway all by myself and started crying. I've never been on my own before, and I've never been away from my mother! I don't know if I'll die soon or what will happen to me. I was sitting there alone, and Senator Palpatine came up to me. The first couple times I saw him I was scared of him, and I was scared of him when he came up to me and tried to put a hand on me. I'm not sure why I was scared. Maybe it was because when I was little I had this reoccurring bad dream where there was this old man that wanted me dead…and he would chase me around, but the old man had yellow eyes, and he was mean (I think I already told you about that dream). I used to wake up crying, and my mother would always tell me that it was a silly dream, and that no old man would ever want me dead, and that no one looked like that. Ever since that dream, I've always been afraid of old men…and for some reason Palpatine reminded me of the old man in my dream. I know it's silly. Anyway, I was scared of him. He started talking to me, but he was really nice. This was our conversation:

He went up to me and asked me, "What's wrong, little boy?"

I said, "The Jedi Council won't let me become a Jedi, and they're mean. They said I'm too old. And I miss my mother…she's still a slave. I don't know what's going to happen to me. I don't know if I'll die."

He said, "Oh? You're the little boy from Tatooine then? The former slave? I've heard all about you. Your name is Anakin Skywalker, right?"

I nodded.

He said, "Well, Anakin, it is a pleasure to meet you. I'm Sepr…I mean Senator Palpatine. So you're Force Sensitive?"

I said, "I guess. I don't know….Qui-Gon thinks I am, and he wanted me to become a Jedi, but I don't know if I passed the Council's tests."

Palpatine said, "That's interesting. The Council members are fools if they won't let you train. But don't worry, Anakin…I'm a politician. Perhaps I can find something for you to do. You could work for me…I need assistants. It was a pleasure meeting with you, and I look forward to talking to you later. Sadly, I must go and see what my informants have to say."

And he left me there. He is so nice! So that means that Palpatine will let me work for him in politics! He's the nicest grown-up I have ever met (besides my mother.) He doesn't look down on me for being 10 years old, and he can give me a job!

Now I won't have to starve to death because someone actually wants me!

What's wrong with being mad at people? They're being unfair. Don't I have a right to be mad? They're ruining my life long dream. My mother said it's okay to be angry when someone does something you don't like, as long as you don't act on that anger. How would you like it if someone said you couldn't be a handmaiden anymore? Would you like that?

I don't think the Jedi will change their mind. They're all against me. Mace Windu, the head of the Jedi Council even said that there are things about me that the Council doesn't like. Obi-Wan hates me. Qui-Gon's the only Jedi in the galaxy that likes me, but he can't do much against all the other Jedi. The Council's decision seemed pretty final, although they said that they would decide my future later. Whatever that means.

I hope Palpatine gets the Supreme Chancellor position, because he's really nice.

What could Qui-Gon do to get me trained? Obi-Wan is already his apprentice, and he's not allowed to take on another. I heard the Council tell him that. Another thing, none of the other Council members are in favor of my training. It looks like I'll NEVER get to be a Jedi now. It just isn't fair!

I wonder what my mother would say if she were here? I wish she could have come with us! I love her very much, and I don't like not being with her. Maybe…maybe if you kissed me it would make me feel better. You said you wished there was something you could do. No girl has ever kissed me before. Would you kiss me?

We're going back to Naboo now? I heard Qui-Gon mention that (and you said it too). I can't wait! Qui-Gon just told me I could come with you, so yes I will be coming! I want to help! What's the Queen's plan for defeating the stinking Trade Federation?

I overheard Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon talking about me…Obi-Wan was saying that I was dangerous, and that the entire Council thought so. I don't think that's right. Why do they think I'm dangerous? I have done nothing. They just judged me by my appearance. That's not fair.

The Gunags have a big army? What is this army going to do? How are we going to defeat the Trade Federation.

I miss you when you're not around me too. I like it when I am around you.

Qui-Gon told me to get in the ship now, so I guess I gotta go. I want to see your planet!

I gotta go now….I'll finish this once we get to Naboo.

I'm back….

We are now on our way to Naboo. I can't wait until we land…your planet must be beautiful, since you're from it.

I'm glad that I got to come with you to Naboo. It'll be so much fun, and we can show the dumb Trade Federation what we're made of, right?

But what if people treat you unfairly or are mean to you. Doesn't that give you a right to be angry. It also makes me mad when I see it happening to other people. That's the only time I get angry, honest. (Either when someone does something unfair to me, or to someone else). Ask my mother. I'm really not an angry person, and I really don't get angered easily.

Yoda isn't a person; he's a nasty, ugly, green troll! I HATE HIM.

Yes, I think it was nice of Senator Palpatine to help me too. He's such a nice person. He's one of my favorite grownups…along with my mom and Qui-Gon. I have to worry about my mom. She's all alone, and what if someone tries to beat her? There will be no one there to protect her. I don't know what she's going to do without me, because I was like her entire life.

What do you think the Gungans will say when we ask them for help? Are all the gungans like Jar-Jar? If so, I don't WANT to meet them. I think Jar-Jar is annoying sometimes. Jar-Jar is going to help the Queen talk to the Gungans. Be careful because he might mess it up.

Our ship will be landing soon, so I'll have to talk to you later.

I'm back again….

Padmé… or should I say Queen Amidala….um…I don't know what to call you anymore.

Umm…………………………I don't know what to say to you now. I mean you're the queen. How come you never told me?

I'm glad the Gungans are going to help us. What exactly are you planning to do. Qui-Gon wouldn't tell me anything, and I want to know what's going on. What are we going to do now?

Your planet is very nice. It has BIG plants like you said it is. I've never seen these kinds of plants. What are the REALLY big ones that are part wood called? They're the strangest things I've ever seen. They have all that green stuff at the top. Are they baby plants that grow out of the wood?

I didn't know you were THE QUEEN. If I would have known that, I wouldn't have thought that I would marry you. What an idiot I was.

Can I be your first male handmaiden if I don't become a Jedi? Maybe I could do it on the side. I want to protect you.

I'm tired. I miss my mom. I've never been away from her.

I've never seen so much water! Jar-Jar asked me if I knew how to swim. I told him no…I don't know how to swim. What is swimming? I've never heard of it. I assume that it has something to do with water because he used the word right when he was looking at the water.

Well Obi-Wan doesn't like me. He never talks to me and he has this annoyed look on his face, plus I over heard him talking to Qui-Gon, saying that I was dangerous. I could tell I was getting in the way, but I don't want to ruin their relationship. I think he is jealous of me.

I don't understand why you think that they will train me. You weren't even at the Jedi Council meeting.

But…some things are so unfair. I don't like unfair things. Do you? Doesn't the Naboo Invasion make you mad? I didn't know you were the queen, but still….you don't know what happened in the Council.

What has my mother been telling you recently?

I really like you….but I feel stupid about having a crush on you now. Why didn't you just tell me you were the Queen? Then I wouldn't have held on to my feelings, and they wouldn't have developed. That was mean of you!

Can you show me what a fish is? What is all the green stuff on the ground? It's so weird here.

Thanks for not telling Sabe I was up late.

Anakin Skywalker


	20. Note 20 Padme

Anakin,

I'm sorry I couldn't tell you I was the Queen. I wish I didn't have to lie to you but I had a good reason for it. When we first landed on Tatooine, I had to disguise myself as a handmaiden because I didn't trust Qui-Gon to handle the situation. I wanted to be involved in what was going on and that was the only way to do it. I'm sorry for lying to you, Ani, I really am. I wish it hadn't had to be like that but it was the only way.

I'm also very sorry that the Coucil isn't allowing you to be trained. I know it isn't fair but you have keep control of yourself. It's perfectly normal to react that way, just don't do anything stupid, ok? I wish there was something I could do to help you. But unfortunately, a Queen has no power in the Jedi Council.

If you didn't want to go to Coruscant to work for Palpatine (who was elected Chancellor by the way), you could stay on Naboo with me. You could live in the palace and go to school. We'd get to see each other a lot and you'd even be able to visit your mother. I don't think you could be a male handmaiden though because all of my handmaidens have to be a girl and they have to look like me so they could take my place if needed. It's ok though, there's plenty of things you could do at the palace and I would like having you there too.

Your mother is going well. She's worried about you, especially since she knows you can't be trained. I did tell her that you could stay with me though. Hopefully, just knowing it's an option will make her feel better. I know she doesn't want to come back and be a slave, especially now that you've been freed. Anything is better than that and I completely agree with her. What you want to do is your decision. Just make sure you tell me what you're going to do. It would be nice to stay in contact with you, even if it's just to tell me how you're doing.

I'm glad you like my planet. I think it's the most beautiful, peaceful planet in the galaxy, but that's only my opinion. I know...there's so much water and green grass and trees. It's beautiful. Hopefully, I'll have time to take you to my favorite spot at the meadow. Then I'd be able to show you what a fish was. I'll talk to you later, Anakin. The battle's about to start and we need to get you to a safe place.

Padme


	21. Note 21 Anakin

Note 21

Padme,

All right…I'll still call you that. I feel weird writing you now because you are THE QUEEN. I've never met such an important person before.

I'm really scared. That creature that was all black and red was the same one that was on Tatooine. He scared me this time too. He had the same RED laser sword, but this time it was double. I don't want him around. I don't like him. Qui-Gon thinks he one of those evil Jedi called Sith. I want to go with you, but Qui-Gon told me to stay in the cockpit. That's not fair. I want to help you.

But if you would have told me, then I wouldn't have said the thing about wanting to marry you. I'm sorry for saying that. You probably already have a boyfriend, and you probably didn't like a little 9 year old to say something like that. I promise it won't happen again.

You should have told Qui-Gon….because Qui-Gon was trying to protect the queen, and he didn't know it was you. What would have happened if we ran into some trouble and Qui-Gon had to choose between protecting you or your decoy…..he would have had to choose to protect your decoy. That wasn't safe on your part. Also, Qui-Gon's a Jedi, and Jedi protect people. Why couldn't you trust him?

Qui-Gon still says he's going to train me as a Jedi somehow. I hope he's right. I couldn't do anything "stupid" to the Jedi Council right now. They're not here. I guess I can't really worry about it. If I worry, nothing will change except I'll get angrier and frustrated.

I'm glad Palpatine was elected Supreme Chancellor! I contacted him, but he hasn't replied. He's so nice…but I want to be a Jedi, not a political aide…like I said before. That would be so boring. I'm glad he's in charge of the Senate. I'd rather work for you on Naboo than be on Coruscant. I'd like to work in your palace, and I could do anything you wanted. School…my mom taught me a lot, and I had a slave school on Tatooine. I learned a lot then, but I bet I could learn even more on Naboo. You mean I couldn't be a handmaiden  All right then. I still want to protect you and work for you….if I can't be a Jedi.

I hope what you told my mom makes her feel better too. Thanks. I want to stay in contact with you too.

There is a meadow? What does it look like? If it's your favorite spot, I want to see it too! Yes, I want to go there with you. After all this junk with the Trade Federation is over, you have to show me around your planet! And you'll be able to show me what a fish is there too? I can't wait. Can I have a fish? Please.

Oh….so that is what a tree is. I'd heard of trees….I just didn't know that that's what they looked like. You see, on Tatooine there aren't very many plants…but we do have some trees. I've never seen them before…..they're on the other side of the planet…….and there is probably that grass stuff there too. I guess it rains in that part of the planet ALL THE TIME. It NEVER has rained anywhere else on the planet. I guess there are a bunch of trees in that one section of the planet, but no one ever goes there because it rains too much…and there are some poisonous plants that can kill people if they're a certain distance away from the plants. If we didn't have those trees (and there are a lot of plants and trees in that little section), no human would be able to live on Tatooine because there wouldn't be any oxygen. I know what oxygen is…I'm not that ignorant. I just didn't know what trees looked like since I had never seen one.

Grass looks like it can be pointy on the edges too. Doesn't it cut your feet? Or is it soft and not pointy? I can't tell. All right…when the battle is over, can you show me one of your pretty fish? I really want to see one since I've never seen one.

I want to protect you.

Hey, do you mind if I ask you a personal question? Have you ever talked with your friends about what names you'd name your kids? I have. I think the name Morgan is nice. If I had a son, that's what I'd name him. And if I had a daughter….hmm….I don't know…..maybe I'd name her Padmé after you. I like your name. Do you have a lot of friends?

Hey those droids that are after you…they have shields. I wish I could do something to stop it…..wait……I'm in the cockpit of a ship…..ship's have weapons in them…..so maybe I CAN help you!!!! Hang on, I'm going to go get rid of the droids for you, okay? I have never fired a gun before, but I'm going to try it. I'm sure it won't be too hard.

Well, bye for now.

Anakin


	22. Note 22 Padme

Anakin,

I know you're still upset that I lied, but can you please try to understand that my people were in danger and not only was I willing to risk my life for them, but I didn't trust Qui-Gon to make decisions with me not there. I knew he wouldn't let the Queen come, so I went as a handmaiden instead. I know I should have told you and I didn't want to lie, but I couldn't. Do you understand? I don't want you to be mad at me because you're my friend. I don't have a lot of friends. There's just not enough time for it but somehow I became friends with you and I don't want to ruin that.

I don't know how Qui-Gon is still going to be able to train you but if it doesn't work out, I understand why you wouldn't want to be on Coruscant. I don't like going there because nothing ever seems to get accomplished when I do. I'd much rather be on Naboo. Anyways, I would be more than happy to have you here with us on Naboo. You could live in the palace if you wanted and I'm sure I could find some job for you there if you wanted but you wouldn't have to.

Meadows have a lot of grass, and no, grass doesn't cut your feet. It feels good to put your feet on the grass because it's so soft. I could sleep there, in the meadow and the grass for hours. It's the most calming place you'll ever go to, I promise. I hope I get to take you there but if you do stay on Naboo, I'm sure we'll get to go there all the time. But I don't think you can take a fish right from the lake and keep it as a pet, though. We have a law against that and I don't want to have to put you in jail now do I?

I never really thought about what I would name my children. I haven't thought much about having children or even getting married. I'd like to be in love someday and experience all of that but my life is so busy and hectic, there just isn't time for that. I don't know...I've always like the name Luke for a boy and for a girl...maybe Leia? Yeah, Leia, I like that. Luke and Leia. That sounds good, doesn't it?

Anakin, I know you wanted to help me and protect me but you really could've gotten hurt when you shot down those destroyers. Please, just stay in the cockpit like Qui-Gon said and don't do anything stupid, ok? I don't want anything bad to happen to you. I'd never be able to forgive myself.

Padme


	23. Note 23 Anakin

Note 23

Padme,

Yeah…but that thing had a red laser sword. Remember that one dream I had had a red laser sword in it. I'm scared of people with red laser swords (lightsabers…I'm used to calling them laser swords). I hope Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan can take care of that thing.

That's all right. I know I'm ignorant of a lot of things….since I was a slave and did not get the opportunity to experience that many different things. I wasn't even allowed to leave that part of Tatooine.

Okay…you have to show me the grass and the fish.

Yeah…..Morgan can be a guy's name too. There aren't very many guys with the name….but there are guys who do have them. Let me tell you why I like it so much, and why I would want to name my kid that……well there was this other slave that was named Morgan. He was about my age, and he was a really good friend of mine. The only problem was that his parents didn't obey their master. They revolted against him…and the Hutts killed Morgan and his family after they had beat him up really badly. All of the other slaves were forced to watch. It was horrible. They made each one of us get really close to members of his family while they were being tortured. I talked to Morgan while they were torturing him…and I made a promise to him that I would name my son in remembrance of him.

So whoever I'm going to marry has to accept the name Morgan…because I made a promise to him….and I don't break my promises.

Hey…you like the name Luke? Did I tell you that that was my middle name? Leia? Well I wouldn't laugh at anyone's choices for names….but I don't really like it. That's fine. Everyone has different tastes.

Danger? What danger? I've LIVED in danger my whole life. I can take care of myself.

Did you see me blow up those droids????? That was fun! I hope that you were able to make it to the throne room by now.

I…um….accidentally kind of got myself into a little trouble. I couldn't figure out how to stop the ship from moving forward after I had tried to find the trigger for the ship's weapons to shoot the droids. The ship was on automatic pilot, and I couldn't stop it. It took off and led me to the Droid Control ship where all the pilots are. Once I finally got to the ship, R2-D2 managed to get the ship off of automatic control……but I'm going to see if I can help the pilots destroy the ship.

Hey….I'm not disobeying anyone…Qui-Gon told me to stay in the cockpit, so that's exactly what I'm going to do.

I'm having a lot of fun!!!!!! This is the first time I've actually flown a ship before, but it wasn't hard to learn. Piloting is really easy, and it's just like pod racing!!!!!!!

My ship got hit, and caused my ship to spin in circles. I didn't like that….but I couldn't regain control…..

I managed to get my ship into this little opening in the Control Ship….which was good because I didn't crash and die. The only bad thing is that there are a lot of droids in here….bad guys……and my ship is overheated….I can't do anything right now. I'm sure I'll be okay. I only have to outsmart droids; that shouldn't be too hard. As soon as my ship cools down, I'll get out of here and see if I can get back in the battle.

I'm not mad at you anymore, okay?

I'd love to live in the palace!!!!!! You live there too, right?

Okay…I can't wait to lay on grass and to see the meadow. You said it's a great place. I believe you. You mean if I stay on Naboo with you, we could go to the meadow together all the time??!!!!!

But I really want a pet…I've always wanted a pet. Slaves couldn't have pets on Tatooine, and I really, really want a fish. Please? I want a pretty one. I can't imagine something living in water…and it would be so cool! People have fish as pets, right? Jar-Jar said so before we left for the battle.

You mean you never thought much about having children or getting married? I thought everyone thought of stuff like that. I hope you're not too busy for a family and love when you get older. Even if I can't marry you….you should marry someone! You deserve to be with someone someday, because you are really nice and I know you would make a great mom and wife.

What's going on with you?

Your friend (we are still friends….right?),

Anakin


	24. Note 24 Padme

Anakin,

Of course we're still friends. Why would you think that we weren't friends anymore? I was just worried that you were still mad at me for lying to you. You know I didn't want to do that. I'm glad you want to live in the palace and yes, I'll live there as long as I am the Queen. You'll like it there, it's big and easy to get lost in, but it's really beautiful and part of the fun of it is exploring all the different rooms. As soon as this battle is over, I can start making the arrangements for you, that is if you still want to stay on Naboo. You don't have to if you don't want to, Anakin. I want you to stay here because you want to not because you think I want you to.

I'm truly sorry about your friend, Morgan. I can't imagine what that must have been like for you to watch that happen to him. I want to try to help the slaves on Tatooine, especially your mom, but Palpatine told me it would be difficult because Tatooine technically isn't in the Republic's durisdiction. I'm gonig to try anyway, but I don't know that I'll succeed in that matter. It's very honorable that you said you would name your son after Morgan. I'm sure he would feel the same way too.

It's weird that Luke is your middle name. What a coincidence. Don't make fun of my name for a girl. I've always liked it and if I had a daughter, that's what I would want to name her.

Anakin, you're in outerspace?? How could you do that? Qui-Gon told you to stay in the cockpit, meaning 'don't go anywhere'. I don't care if you think you're not disobeying anyone, you're going to get yourself killed doing that. I don't want anything to happen to you so please come back right now. Don't do anything stupid, Anakin.

And no, you can't have a fish for a pet. I already told you you'll get in trouble!

Padme


	25. Note 25 Anakin

Note 25

Padme,

Guess what!!!! Well the engines finally cooled off enough for me to turn my ship back on…just in time too. The droids were approaching my ship. In order for me to clear the way so that I could maneuver, I started shooting at the droids. My fingers slipped and I accidentally hit another button which shot two really large balls of fire out of my ship….and I accidentally missed the droids…and hit this big thing in the room I was in. I decided that I needed to get out of there real fast….whatever it was that I hit caused a lot of fire….I got out of there safely.

As soon as I got out I noticed that the whole Trade Federation Control Ship was blowing up!!!!!! It was blowing up from the inside…..whatever it was that I hit in that room made the whole Control Ship blow up!!!!!!!! I'm the one that destroyed it!!!!!!!!! I saved Naboo!!!!!!

Well I'm heading back now. I don't think anyone knows that I blew that thing up…I think they might know the ship number….and they probably think their pilot friend that was supposed to be in here is the one that blew it up. Wait until they find out it was me!! I can't wait to see the look on everyone's faces when they find out that it was a 9 year old! I noticed that the pilot that was supposed to be in this ship got killed before Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon started fighting that freaky looking thing.

Hmm…..well every girl I've talked to doesn't like the name Morgan. My wife probably won't like it either. I suppose I could use it as a middle name……then technically I would still be naming my kid after him…it just wouldn't be his first name. What do you think about that? Do you think a girl would go along with it as a middle name? Hmmm….I don't know….I guess Leia is okay for girl names, but I still don't like it. I hope I don't have any girls. I mean it would be okay….but I like boys a lot better. I would be able to teach my boys how to fly, fight, and build things. I don't know what I would do with a girl. I do have your name as my only reserve for a girl name…..I suppose I could also name a girl Morgan…just in case I didn't have a boy. Would you rather have girls or boys or doesn't it matter to you? All my other friends say they would prefer one over the other.

Yep…Luke is my middle name. If you don't believe me, you can ask my mom. She's the one that named me.

Oh good!!!! You made it to the throne room!!!!! Did you force them to sign a treaty? Have you heard from your friend Sabe yet? Do you know if she's okay? And I wonder about Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan. I wonder if they killed that THING yet.

I just wanted to make sure that you still wanted to be friends with me….since you are the queen and everything.

Okay…as long as you are Queen I can live in the palace, but what if the new Queen didn't like me? I never get lost, and I like exploring. We could explore the entire palace together. That would be fun. If I can't be a Jedi, I want to live on Naboo with you!!!!

Is your battle over yet?

I didn't tell you what my mom told me about my dad, did I? She finally told me about him, and he's really mean and sold my mother and me into slavery when she was pregnant with me. If I get to be a Jedi someday….I'll make him pay. I hate him!!!!

And guess what…he dared to talk to her! Both Kitster and mom told me. I think he tried buying her back, but he couldn't. If he hurts her….I'll make him very sorry.

No, Qui-Gon just told me to stay in the cockpit. He never said I couldn't fly in the cockpit…I'm still here. He didn't tell me not to go anywhere. And I didn't get myself killed. I'm coming back to Naboo, and I'm not dead yet. I'm a great pilot, and I'm THE PERSON WHO DESTROYED THE CONTROL SHIP. ! ha ha!

But I REALLY want a pet fish. Can't I go somewhere to get one? If I get one, I'd name it "Fishy."

Your friend,

Anakin

Written 9/30/05


	26. Note 26 Padme

Anakin,

I can't believe you destroyed the Trade Federation Control ship! You're a hero, Anakin. You saved us all and I can't thank you enough for what you've done for not only my planet, but for the galaxy as well. I can't wait to see you and make sure that you're alright. Your mother is going crazy she's worrying about you so much.

It must have been frightening up there all alone. Were you scared? Did you know you were going to blow the ship up? Please tell me more as soon as you get back. I still can't believe you did this. I suppose it pays to be disobedient every once in a while.

Hmmm...about those names for children....I don't know Anakin, Morgan isn't a very good name for a girl, at least I think so anyway. I think it would be better as the middle name for your son, if you have one. As for a girl, I wouldn't really have expected you to be thinking what you would name a daughter. But I do think you're wrong about not knowing what to do with a girl. You would love her and she would be your little angel. I think you'll just have to take my word for it. You know, all this talk about naming children is sort of strange, Anakin. You're only nine years old, and I'm fourteen. Aren't we a little young to be thinking about having children? Not with each other, of course, but in general?

Anyways, I'm sorry, Anakin, but it's going to be really hard to get you a pet fish on Naboo. I already told you it's against the law. You don't want to get me in trouble, do you?

Anakin...there's something I have to tell you. The battle is over now, we've won, Anakin. But...we paid a very great price. Qui-Gon lost his life fighting the Sith. Obi-Wan managed to survive and even killed the Sith that killed Qui-Gon. You needed to know and I thought it might be easier if you heard it from me. I'm very sorry, Anakin. I know you considered him a friend.

I'll see you soon.

Padme


	27. Note 27 Anakin

Padme,

Well I'm back now. I loved to see the looks on everyone's faces when they found out that it was me!!! Did you see the shock on their faces? They were expecting that one pilot who got killed, and they found me!!!!

Did you hear everyone say what a great pilot I was? Maybe I can be a pilot for Naboo now. Everyone was firing questions at me. That was fun telling everyone how it was all an accident.

All right…thanks for giving me your opinion. I'll make my wife have Morgan as a middle name for my first boy. You know what I want? I want twin boys. Don't you think that would be fun to have twins? Maybe I'm just weird. I always think about the future because it's fun. I don't want any girls. I just want all boys.

Yeah…but MOST girls don't like that kind of stuff. I know some do…..but still….I'd rather have all boys.

Yep!!! I blew up the Trade Federation ship!!!! I love saying that! What did the Trade Federation leaders say when you told them that a 9 year old blew up their ship?

Obi-Wan didn't really want to talk to me, but he was able to tell me that much. Well, I don't know what's going to happen now. Obi-Wan said that there's supposed to be a funeral for Qui-Gon soon.

I'm never going to become a Jedi now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Qui-Gon was the only one that was supporting, and the only one that wanted me to be a Jedi. No one else does. With him gone…….I can't become one!

I don't know where Obi-Wan is right now….it's late and the funeral is supposed to be starting in a couple hours.

Obviously I'm done crying now…..but you and Obi-Wan are the only people I feel comfortable around.

I don't know….I am a Naboo hero……but I'm sure some people (like Yoda and Obi-Wan) still don't like me.

What did Obi-Wan think of me blowing up the Control Ship….and what about Yoda? I wonder what they thought of it!!!!

Can I stand by you and Obi-Wan during the funeral?

Can you show me a fish now….and grass?

I miss Qui-Gon!!!!!! He promised my mother that he would take care of me….now what????

My mom shouldn't worry about me so much. I'm fine.

Me scared? I've been in the middle of danger TONS of times before. I wasn't scared at all. It was actually fun. No, I didn't know I would blow the ship up. I accidentally hit a firing button while I was waiting for my ship to cool. I was trying to hit the droids, honestly.

But I REALLY want a pet fish. I thought that fishes could be pets. I would take care of it; I promise. Why is it illegal to have a pet fish? Are they endangered here? I guess I didn't realize they were an endangered species. I don't know why…I guess because all of the animals on Tatooine are found EVERYWHERE on the planet. I heard Obi-Wan say something about endangered species. He was showing me some pictures in a wildlife book he had. I guess he was trying to make me stop crying about Qui-Gon…and maybe because the Council doesn't like me and won't let me get trained.

I'm really glad that Obi-Wan was able to kill that ugly Sith. I hope that all the Sith die and never ever come back. I hate them!!

Your friend,

Anakin


	28. Note 28 Padme

Anakin,

I still have no idea how you managed to pull that off. And yes, I did see the look on everyone's faces...I think they were just as surprised as I was! And the fact that it was just an accident...it's a miracle you even made it back in one piece. I'm also supposed to tell you that your mother doesn't want you to go out into space again for a very, very long time (which I think is pretty fair). Anyways, everyone's still talking about how you saved the battle and the Republic. It's just amazing. Completely amazing.

Twin boys? I don't know. Boys will just fight with each other, but then again, so will girls, I suppose. I guess if you really want to have twins, a boy and girl would probably be what I would want. They'd be able to take care of each other and you'd have the best of both worlds, if that makes any sense. Your wife would get a little girl to dress up in cute little girl clothes and you would have a boy to teach how to pilot, how to fix things.

I know it seems like Obi-Wan may not like you, but I think it's not really about you. You have to remember that he just lost his Master. I'm sure Qui-Gon was like a father to him and now he's gone. I know you really liked Qui-Gon too, so try to think about it that way. Obi-Wan is grieving and I'm sure he's trying to figure out what he's going to do now too. In a way, he's really in the same position as you are. Both of you just lost someone very important and now neither one of you really knows what's going to happen from here.

I'm glad he seems to be trying to be friends with you. I think you both need that right now. I don't know Obi-Wan very well but I know he is well-respected within the Republic and in the Jedi Council as well. He could turn out to be someone you can trust, Anakin, you just have to give him the opportunity to earn your trust.

About that fish, well, I might be able to help you with that. At my Lake Retreat, there's plenty of ponds and you will definitely be able to see some fish there. If you wanted to keep one as a pet, well...I don't think anyone would miss one of those fish at the Lake Retreat. It's a really nice there and you could stay as long as you wanted to. I would really like to take you there, even though I'm not entirely sure when I'll be able to find some free time to get there. Maybe we could even have a picnic? I haven't had a picnic in so long...and it really sounds like fun. I hope we can get there soon. I think we've both earned a little vacation after everything that's happened.

I know you're scared right now but I promise, no matter what happens, I'm going to make sure you're alright. I wish I could say I knew what the Council is going to decide, but whatever happens, I'll make sure you're taken care of.

I have to go to the ceremony now...and yes, you can definitely stand next to Obi-Wan and me.

Padme


	29. Note 29 Anakin

Padme,

Hey!!!!! Guess what? Obi-Wan just told me that he talked to Yoda (the troll I didn't like) and Yoda told him that I could be Obi-Wan's apprentice! Isn't that great??????!!!!!

I get to become a Jedi now!!!!!!

I asked Obi-Wan why he suddenly changed his mind. You know what he said? He said that Qui-Gon made him promise that he would train me to become a Jedi! Obi-Wan agreed and said that he was not going to break the promise….and that he would have trained me even if he didn't have the Council's approval. Yoda finally agreed.

I guess Yoda still doesn't like me….but I get to become a Jedi Knight!!! I can't wait!

Yeah!!!!!! I want to stand by you in the parade too!!!!

Thanks for showing me the fish and the grass. Fish look strange, but they're a lot better looking than I thought they would look. They're actually pretty. I want one. Can I have one as a pet? I don't think I want to eat one…..they're too cute to eat.

I'm glad grass doesn't hurt you. I want to run around in it. It looks like so much fun!!

Who is that guy you were talking to? The one with the blond hair? Nevermind…Sabe told me. She said his name was Krilien. Krilien? Do you like him? You seem like you do. Do you think you'll marry him? I don't really like him. He's too perfect.

I feel bad that I feel excited in happy when we're going to Qui-Gon's funeral, but I can't help it. I get to be a Jedi!!!!!!

I hope Obi-Wan likes me better now. He let me stand between you and him at the funeral.

So what did you think of the funeral? I thought it was very meaningful. Do you think Qui-Gon would have liked his funeral?

What were Yoda and the other Jedi Council guy talking about? They were saying something about a master an apprentice.

All right!!!!! I want a pet fish!!! Thanks for the datacard….I picked some out. I've enclosed the numbers of the fish I want with this letter. Please get them to me before the parade.

All right….I guess I'll try to eat some of the kinds of fish that you eat.

Oh, I don't really know how I did it either. I guess it was the Jedi power stuff that Qui-Gon kept talking to me about. Now I get to really use my Jedi powers because I get to be a Jedi!!! Hey, since I get to be a Jedi, that means that I can order people around and they will be scared of me. Some day when I'm older, I'm going to go find my father and make him pay. I think I'll contact him and scare him a little.

My mom is NOT going to stop me from going into space again. I HAVE to go into space if I'm a Jedi. I have to go to other planets and stuff. Maybe she just doesn't have to know. Please don't tell her. She doesn't really know much about Jedi. She can think that I just stay on one planet all the time and help people. That would make her happy. Then, maybe she wouldn't worry so much about me. I don't like to make her worry or be sad.

You said that I saved the Republic. How'd I do that? What do you mean by that?

But boys are more fun than girls. I already told you….I DON'T WANT A GIRL; I only want boys. Do people get to decide if they get twins or not. I hope so. I don't think my wife would want a girl just to dress up. If that's why she wanted a girl, then she could just get a doll. Then she wouldn't have to worry about feeding it or changing it. I think it would be cool to have twins. Like I said, I would want them both to be boys. I have some friends who are twins, and they are really cool. I would like to have a twin, but that's impossible, so maybe I can have kids who are twins. I could teach them both how to pilot and how to fix things. My wife would like that too. She doesn't need any girls.

Obi-Wan got made a full Jedi. He gets to go on missions now and stuff. Also, I get to come with him because I get to be his apprentice. I can't wait to go back to Coruscant and be trained by him. I guess I can understand what you were saying about Obi-Wan missing Qui-Gon. I'd be really sad if my mom died. That must be how he feels, since he didn't really have anyone besides Qui-Gon. Maybe I can make Obi-Wan feel better by talking to him. He needs me to be his friend, and I need him as a friend…just as you said.

How do you think that I can earn Obi-Wan's trust? I still remember what he said about me and the dirty looks he gave me before. Do you think he'll ever REALLY like me. Do you think that he will ever consider me as his friend?

I'm really happy that you're letting me take some fish from the Lake Retreat area. I don't how long I'll be able to stay. I have to go with Obi-Wan right after we have the parade and awards ceremony. Oh yeah…I have to tell you something else.

Well….Obi-Wan told me I was only allowed to write to you one time after the parade, and then I'm not supposed to write to you or see anyone else besides the Jedi for a while. He said that I shouldn't bother you and stuff…and he's watching me carefully….so I don't think I can get away with sending you any letters after the last one after the parade. I'll have to say good-bye to you. Maybe Obi-Wan will let me see you sometime, but Obi-Wan and the Jedi Council said that because I haven't been raised a Jedi….I'm not allowed to have any contact with people that aren't Jedi or on Coruscant. I don't know how long this period will last. I just wanted to tell you that. This means I can't talk to my mother or Kitster either.

I would really like to have a picnic with you, Padme, but like I said, Obi-Wan and I have to leave right away. I don't think he likes me spending time with you anyway. He would probably say it would be harder for me not to contact you. I really, really want to talk to you and eat a picnic, but I don't think it will work out this time. Maybe in a few years Obi-Wan and the Jedi Council will let me see you again. Then we could have a picnic.

I guess I'll see you at the parade and awards ceremony. C-ya.

Your friend,

Anakin

Part 2

Well…..unfortunately I was interrupted and couldn't finish the letter until after the parade. This means that this is my very last letter to you. L

I'll keep your letters forever.

Let's see….there are a few things I want to say to you, but I don't know what to say. You've been a great friend to me, and I look up to you. I still think you're the most beautiful girl I've ever met. I'm really glad that your ship got damaged so that you could meet me, and so that I could become a Jedi.

I don't know if I'll ever see you again….but maybe I will. I hope that I can become a great Jedi Knight and that you will remember me always…and if you ever hear of my name, I hope that you remember me.

Bye forever.

Your friend,  
Anakin Skywalker….soon to be a Jedi Padawan


	30. Note 30 Padme

Ani,

That's great news; but I am so sad that I won't be able to write you anymore. Maybe I'll be allowed to visit you occassionly.

Qui-Gon's funeral was very…nice for the lack of a better word. I thought it was very appropriate and I think Qui-Gon would've liked it very much.

Okay, I'll try and get them to you. I hope you like them; they are fun to watch (especially when you are bored ^__^)

LOL, that's funny. I don't think Krilien's perfect; in fact I know he's not. I'm sorry that you didn't like him much. He's a close friend.

Wow, Sabe asked me the same thing. I don't know if I will marry him. Maybe I will, maybe I won't.

The parade was great; although being on my feet all day is not fun. Still, I enjoyed it very much and you looked like you were having fun too. You looked so cute in your Padawan outfit!

Well, Palpatine is a little freaky I guess, but he's always been someone I trust implicitly. I guess you just have to get to know him first. He's been a good mentor to me.

I guess this is good-bye. I'll never forget you, Ani; the necklace and the letters will see to that. You are the smartest, bravest young man I have ever met and I'm glad I could call you friend.

I'm not really sure what to say right now, except Good luc. Oh, I guess I should say may the Force be with you. And I'm sure it will, Ani, I'm sure it will.

Good-bye

Forever your friend,  
Padme


	31. Start of AOTC Note 31 Anakin

Note 31

Ten years after the Trade Federation of Naboo

Ten years later

To the Senator who was recently attacked, (Sorry, I wasn't told what planet you were from)

Hello. I hope you are doing well…you probably think this is a strange letter, because you don't know my writing. Let me first explain my purpose to you, and a little bit about myself.

First of all, I am a Jedi….but not quite….I'll explain that later. The Jedi Council sent me to you because of the attempted assassination. They felt that since you are the leader of the opposition to the army, and because someone tried to kill you that you needed to be protected by a Jedi. I'm not sure how long you'll need to be protected, but I won't put you in unnecessary danger.

Now to explain a little bit about myself…I am a Jedi Knight, but not quite. You see, I am a Jedi Padawan, and I'm not quite done with my training. I don't want you to get the wrong idea. My master will be with me, and he will be the one in charge. I just always like getting to know the people I'll be working with/protecting. My master would kill me if he knew I was contacting you…because it's not part of the mission. He always gets on me about doing things without the approval of the Council or not following the Code. It really gets me sometimes. See Padawans can't go on missions by themselves (unless given direct permission by the Council), but Jedi can, so I thought I should explain it. Like I said, I'm not doing this mission by myself.

I'm telling you all this so that you have a full understanding of me and our situation. I'm only 19 years old, but I my skills have far surpassed other Padawans my own age…so don't think I'm incompetent just because of my age. Palpatine always tells me that I'm the most gifted Jedi he has ever met, and he always makes me feel important. He says that I should be a Jedi right now, but the Council thinks otherwise. I have never been on a mission on my own. I know you're thinking this is weird….that a 19 year old has to protect you….you're probably somewhere in your 40's or 50's, but just try to tolerate it. Also, remember that my master will be the one in charge…..and he's 35 years old.

I think I've said all I needed to. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask. I don't know how long you will need to be protected, so we could be stuck together for a few months.

Please consider everything carefully.

I'm sending my most recent picture….it was taken last week……so that you kind of know what I look like. I'm also sending you a picture of my master (although he doesn't know it, and he'll kill me if he ever finds out.)

I guess that's it. I have to go feed my fish now.

Sincerely,

Jedi Padawan,

Anakin Skywalker


	32. Note 32 Padme

Author - lady_sapphire (at the Jedi Council forums)  
.?usr=1163508

Anakin,

It's so good to hear from you! You have no idea how worried I was about you...over the years, I tried to learn how you were doing whenever I could, but the information was hard to come by. I'm glad to hear that you're doing well and learning everything you wanted to learn as a Jedi...almost a Jedi Knight.

As you know, my life is apparently in great danger and I've already lost a good friend becaue of this situation. But I want you to know that I trust you and Obi-Wan with my life and have complete faith in your abilities to keep me safe. I also wanted to ask you...why do both you and Obi-Wan need to be in charge of my protection? I certainly don't need two Jedi protecting me, let alone one for that matter. If you're almost a Jedi Knight, surely you are completely capable of maintaining my protection on your own. This way, Obi-Wan would be able to continue working with the negotiations and not have to worry about me.

Besides, I think this would be a much better solution for everyone. I'm sure Obi-Wan has much more important things to worry about than me and I would feel much more comfortable with this situation if I knew I wasn't taking away an important asset to the negotiations with the Separatists (as well as see an old friend, which I'm very much looking forward to). I don't know if it's possible or not but I suppose I don't see why you couldn't be my protector. Would this be your first 'mission' without Obi-Wan? If it is, I can't imagine an easier assignment, considering I don't anticipate any further trouble, especially now that I've already spoken in the Senate.

That being said, I should probably tell you that I really don't see the need to involve the Jedi with my protection. My bodyguard has been doing an excellent job and will continue to do so. I'm sorry...I hope I didn't offend you or sound ungrateful for your help. It's just that...as I said before, I feel your talents and abilities are being wasted on me. I'm really not that important and there are definitely more pressing matters that should be taken care of before my welfare is taken under consideration. Please, take that as a complement as I don't mean to offend you.

Anyways, I can't even being to express how happy I am that I'll get to see you again. I was beginning to think I'd never see you again and know how you were doing. I'm looking forward to hearing everything about your training and all the adventures you must have gone on over these last ten years. There are some things I would like to tell you...there have been some very significant changes in my life since we last spoke, but of course, that's only if you want to speak with me in that way. I'll understand if you don't wish to socialize...it's been ten years and I won't be offended if you just want to do your job. I can only imagine how much you must have changed since I last saw you, especially if your picture is any indication.

I'm looking foward to seeing you, Anakin. And I know my protection is in very good hands.

Padme


	33. Note 33 Anakin

Note 33

Padmé,

Wow!!!! I…I don't know what to say. I'm so glad that it is you that Obi-Wan and I will be protecting and not just some politician. You have no idea how much I am looking forward to seeing you again in person!

Obi-Wan and I just got back from a border dispute, and the Council or whoever suggested that you needed Jedi protection must have remembered that Obi-Wan…(well of course they would have remembered…he was the one that killed Darth Maul)…was the Padawan that protected you before.

Smiles….remember, I told you that I wouldn't always be a little boy.

And about me not remembering you….you could not be more wrong. I've never forgotten you, and I never will. I promise you that. There hasn't been a day that's gone by that I haven't thought of you. How could I forget you? My meeting with you changed my entire life. If you and Qui-Gon hadn't landed on Tatooine, and you hadn't needed money for your ship, I would still be a slave on Tatooine. And…I better not say it…never mind.

I assume that you have met with Obi-Wan already, or at least that he already contacted you…Why didn't he tell me? He knew that I…no I guess I didn't tell him because I knew he wouldn't listen to me; he never does. He probably just assumed that I wouldn't care. I don't like it when he doesn't consult me.

At any rate, so you do remember me? That's a relief. You've…you've been worried about me? Why….I……have been training as a Jedi. There was nothing to worry about.

You asked me why both Obi-Wan and I have to protect you…..don't ask me…I mean, of course you can ask me anything, but that doesn't mean that I know the answer….it was the Council's decision to have both of us assigned to you. It really doesn't surprise me. I've NEVER been given an assignment on my own before, and…..it's because the Council doesn't trust me. Obi-Wan's always going on and on about how they don't trust me. I don't think it's because they don't think I could handle an assignment on my own, but I think it's their way of holding me back. They are afraid of what would happen – how good I would be at it, and they don't want me to surpass them. Plus…….I don't think they would ever let me protect you on my own. They would be afraid of a lot of things…they know things that….well, I shouldn't tell you…I'll just say that it has to do with the no attachment rule. They would never let me be alone with you because they would be afraid that I'd form an attachment with you again. There…I said it. I'm honestly surprised that they are even letting me on this mission with Obi-Wan, and they're not making me stay behind in the Jedi Temple.

Anyway, I'm sorry to hear that you lost a good friend when you arrived on Coruscant. Would you like to tell me about her? Or if you'd rather not talk to me about it, I understand. Just know that if you need me, I'm here to listen.

Believe me, I would like it if Obi-Wan were sent off to go work on the negotiations stuff, and I protected you alone. However, I cannot control what the Council decides, and I know that Obi-Wan isn't going to leave me alone with you, especially after some of his lectures to me over the years. He also would not dare leave me unless it was the Council who assigned him somewhere. It won't do any good to tell him to go work on the negotiations. That would probably make him want to watch over us all the more.

Padme, listen to me…..you need our protection. You would have been killed on the landing platform if you had not used a decoy. Until we learn who is behind the attack, we have to assume that they will try again. They must have learned about what really happened by now. They will be back. Obi-Wan doesn't want to track down the killer, but it is necessary. I'll do what I can to figure it out – without Obi-Wan knowing. There must be some way of finding a clue. Has anyone threatened you or have you made any recent enemies? Now that I'm here and have been given the assignment of protecting you, I refuse to leave your side again until I know you are safe. I'm in this now, and there is no way that I'm going to just let someone try to kill you again. They might be successful next time.

Don't worry; you haven't offended me. However, I don't think that you are admitting to yourself how serious this situation is. My talents and abilities would never be wasted on you. I will do what I can to protect you, and that is what I'd rather be doing than anything else in the galaxy right now. You're important to me, Padme. You always have been and you always will be. I'm glad…I was beginning to think that I'd never have a chance to see you again either. Of course I want to hear all about what has been happening in your life….including these significant changes that you spoke of. I want to know everything about you, Padme, and I want you to know that you can talk to me about anything that you want to.

My training has been going…well I've been doing very well, but I'm tired of training. I know I'm ready to face the trials, but Obi-Wan thinks that I'm too unpredictable. He doesn't trust my opinion…he sees me as a little Padawan that can do his dirty work for him. He never listens to me. I've been having bad dreams about my mother…and when I try to tell him that they're Jedi visions he ignores me and tells me that, "dreams will pass." He thinks he knows everything. He doesn't understand me, Padmé, and I'm tired of it. I hate being told what to do, say or think. I'm 19 years old and I have higher skills than most Jedi….and I think I even have more skills than Obi-Wan does. No one respects my opinions or anything that I say…because they only see me as a Padawan. The only person who REALLY listens to me is Palpatine. I don't get to talk with him that often, but only every once in a while. Palpatine sympathizes with me and he keeps encouraging me…he always knows the right thing to say. I respect him more than any other person I have ever met…well maybe except…no, I can't say it.

There are other points that Obi-Wan and I argue on. He doesn't understand me, like I said before. I try to follow the will of the Force all the time….and when I do things because I sense things, he yells at me. I'll follow the Force even to the point of breaking the Code or going against the Council…..like Qui-Gon used to do. Obi-Wan is the opposite and almost follows the Code and Council exactly. He thinks that's the only right way, and it bugs me.

Don't get me wrong…Obi-Wan's a great Jedi Master. He's as powerful as Master Windu and he's definitely one of the wisest Jedi, but I just wish he would LISTEN to me, or give me some kind of respect. I suppose that I am glad to be his Padawan.

Yes, I still have the fish you gave me. They're the exact same ones…I take good care of them, so no; they didn't die. I really have enjoyed them, and I treasure them…because when I look at them I remember the events on Naboo…and you.

It's too bad that the Senate chambers and the Jedi Temple are on opposite sides of Coruscant. Even if the Temple were right next to the Senate chamber, the Jedi would not have allowed me to see you without a good reason, especially during my early years of training. Like I told you in my message 10 years ago, they didn't want me being influenced by non-Jedi people until I had a few years of training. Of course I went on missions with Obi-Wan, but attachments are forbidden in the Jedi Code…..so I'm not allowed to become close friends with anyone outside of the Jedi Order. Obi-Wan knew that I admired you during the Naboo Invasion, and he told the Council….and they made sure that I had no contact with you…until now. You see, Jedi are normally taken and trained from birth…because Jedi are supposed to have a pure training (no outside influences, no attachments, no hate, no fear…that kind of thing), but I was 9 when Qui-Gon found me. The Council didn't want me to be trained because I already had attachments (my mother) and I did not have the pure kind of training, which is why they didn't want me to be trained. After the Naboo Invasion, the Council finally agreed to have me trained…but they said that I couldn't spend any time with people that were not Jedi, except on missions or anything that had to do with missions. That's how I got to know Palpatine…..

Well…um…I hope that you don't think I'm stupid. I know I said some things to you 10 years ago that I shouldn't have said, and I'm sorry.

Hey, I didn't tell you about the slave rescue did I? Well four years after the Naboo Invasion, I rescued my mother. I didn't tell anyone about it except for Palpatine…I didn't even tell Obi-Wan….I knew that he wouldn't have liked it, and neither would the Council (They had a strict order that I was not allowed to see my mother again.) I think Watto was touched by what I did. I didn't have enough money to pay the whole thing off, so my father paid the rest. My father's name was Summoner Skywalker, but that he had changed his name to Cliegg Lars. I don't remember for sure, but I think I told you about him when I found out about him and what he did to my mother and me!

In case I didn't tell you before, here is a recap -- during the time that my mother was pregnant with me, my father was having a hard time with the moisture farm. He had joined the organization called the Maurders (made up of Hutts, and other creatures/people, and led by this guy named Mr. Orange Idiot), and so you know what he did? He SOLD my mother to a Hutt when she was pregnant with me!!!!! (I think he was also into gambling) I HATED him for doing that…for putting my mother through all that slavery…and for what he did to me. It almost seemed as if he didn't even care about me. My mother said that she forgave him…but I can't forgive him. At any rate, we went over to the Skywalker (now called Lars) family moisture farm where I met my two brothers Owen and Rhun. I knew I could only stay a few hours….but during those hours I could think of nothing but getting my father back. Can you imagine a father selling his pregnant wife into slavery? He and I did NOT get along at all…and I got into a fight with Rhun too…so that's when I knew it was time to go. I didn't want to leave my mother, but I knew I had to. I haven't seen my mother since.

The nightmares are really scaring me. I don't know who's behind her pain and suffering….but if it's my father…..oh….he's going to be in big trouble. I'm going to kill him! I swear it! I know that Jedi are not supposed to feel like that…but I HATE my father.

Enough about that. I want to hear about you. How have you been? What have you been doing in these past ten years? Do you have any idea who is behind the assassination attempts?

I'm glad that I'll be seeing you soon. I can't believe that in 2 hours I will be able to see you again.

Two hours later, after the meeting:

Normally I don't allow people to call me Ani…because that was what people called me when I was a little kid…mostly my mother…and even then I only reserved it for my closest friends. However, I'll allow you to call me it…as long as you're not implying that I'm a little kid when you call me that. Please don't look at me as just a little boy…I'm 19 years old now. With the right intention…I'd tolerate it, even though I prefer the name Anakin. But then…I don't know…you are a special person…maybe I'd like it okay if you called me Ani.

Yes, well…how could I forget you? I cannot tell you the full reason right now, because I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable or strange, and it would be a stupid thing to say. Now that I've seen you in person again, I can just say that you're exactly how I remembered you were, and that I am now confident that I was right about something.

Well whoever is behind the attempts, we will find out, I promise you. I don't care what Obi-Wan says about it not being part of our mission. He needs to realize that sometimes it's better to imply more into the mission then what the Council assigns us. It would be stupid to protect you without knowing who was behind the attempts…..if we found out who was behind the attempts, we could STOP that attempts.

Well it's late now. I noticed that you have decided to go to bed, but that you switched off the security cameras. I don't know why you insisted on sleeping in a separate room from your security guard Typho, and your friend Dorme. It's as if you're asking for the assassin to make an attempt on your life….wait…that's what you're doing, isn't it? You're setting yourself up. That's dangerous, especially since you turned of the cameras. Make sure you program R2 to alert us if there is trouble.

I hope you have a good night. I'll see you in the morning.

Anakin

PS Do you have any boyfriend or anything?


	34. Note 34 Padme

Author - lady_sapphire (at the Jedi Council forums)  
.?usr=1163508

Anakin,

Well, first off, I think I should apologize for calling you Ani. I didn't even think that you wouldn't want that...I was just so used to calling you Ani, I didn't think twice about it. And you're right, you're not a little boy anymore. I'll start calling you Anakin.

And you should know, Anakin, that if you weren't able to forget me, I certainly couldn't forget about you either. How could I? You saved Naboo all those years ago and you're still remembered as a hero on my planet. Your bravery, especially at such a young age, couldn't be forgotten. But even if you hadn't done that, I could never forget the little boy who was so sweet, so welcoming, so helpful. You've never been far from my thoughts and although it seems like it's hard for you to believe, I was worried about you. It wasn't so much about your safety, I knew you would be safe at the Temple, it was more about you being taken away from your mother, being taken away from everything you knew, and suddenly being surrounded by strangers on a strange planet (let's be honest, Coruscant is a strange place). I was worried you and Obi-Wan wouldn't get along, that you would be lonely, hoping that you would make good friends, especially if I couldn't be there. I promised your mother the last time I spoke with her that I would look after you and as it turned out, it wasn't very easy for me to do that.

It sounds like you and Obi-Wan have your differences. I don't know him very well...it has been ten years since I've seen him as well and even before then, I didn't have much interaction with him. But from what I can tell based off of what you've told me, it seems like your issue is communication above anything else. Maybe if you sat down with him and told him everything you're feeling about the way you're training is going, how he makes you feel sometimes, your concerns for your mother, and were completely honest, you two might be able to find some common ground. I know that's just the diplomat in me speaking, but I've always found that talking things through is usually the best way to solve problems. I'm sure if you just talk to him, Anakin...he might not even realize he makes you feel that way.

About your training, I know you feel you're ready to move forward, but sometimes it's best to listen to those with more experience than you. After the Naboo Invasion, I was ready to leave and become a Senator as soon as my first term as Queen as over. But in speaking with Bail Organa, the Senator from Alderaan, he advised me to wait especially since Senators have to be certain age anyways. He advised me to try for another term as Queen and to get as much experience as I could before I became a Senator. At the time, I was upset and disappointed because I believed I could do more for the galaxy and my planet in the Senate. Instead, I worked with Bail to form a committee, which is now the Loyalist Committee and became the official head of it after Bail had to step down because of the attacks against his life. But now, in hindsight, I think that was really the best way because I was able to get more experience in politics and in dealing with politicians and I think I'm a better Senator now because of it. Sometimes, Anakin, you just have to be patient and listen to those who give you advice. I know it's hard and I know you think you're ready, but you might not be. And even if you are, you still need to respect those in a higher position than you and those who are more experienced than you. I'm sure Obi-Wan means well and when he thinks you're ready, he'll tell you.

I'm glad you were able to help your mother, even if it was difficult for you to see your father. I had no idea he was the one who sold you and your mother into slavery. I can't imagine...at least you were able to free her and at least your father did the right thing to make up the difference you couldn't pay. I had tried to free her after the Naboo Invasion was over but it didn't work. I'm so happy you were able to do what I couldn't.

Besides becoming a Senator, there's been another huge change in my life. Right after we last spoke ten years ago, I found out that I was adopted. As it turns out, I was actually born from true royalty. Both my birth parents contacted me and informed me that they had been King and Queen of Naboo but had been forced to send me and my birth sister (I have a sister!) away because of the political situation on Naboo at the time. Their lives were in danger and they didn't want anything to happen to my sister and I, so they gave us both away and went into hiding to protect themselves as well. What's even more unbelievable is that my birth father told me that the royal family was all born with something called the Royal Force. Before you get too excited, it's not the same as the Force you have. I still don't completely understand it but what I do understand is that it makes me more able to control my emotions even though I also feel my emotions much more strongly than a normal person. Once my father explained that, some things did manage to click into place. I had always felt different from the rest of my adopted family members, I just didn't know why. I suppose now I know why I was able to stay as calm as I was during the Invasion.

Both my birth parents, Ruwee and Jobal, have been very understanding. At first, I had no idea what to think or how to react. Then I couldn't believe my adopted parents had never told me I was adopted. I know they were just trying to protect me but it was very difficult to understand how they could keep something like that from me for so long. At it was also hard to accept my birth parents as my parents and let them into my life. They were both willing to take whatever I was willing to give them and it took me a while before I was able to really see them as my parents and not as the people who gave me away, even though I understood why they had to do it. All that aside, even in the beginning of all that, the one thing I never had trouble coming to terms with was having an older sister. Sola welcomed me with open arms and I can't tell you how amazing it is to have an older sister! I'd always wanted that...someone to talk to, ask advice, have fun with, just to have a sister in general has been fantastic.

On top of that, I'm also an aunt now! My two little nieces, Ryoo and Pooja are so much fun. At first, I wasn't sure how I would be with children since I'd never really interacted with babies before and surprisingly, it came pretty naturally. They're both so smart...you really have to be careful what you say around them because they don't miss anything! I can already tell that Ryoo might have a career in politics someday and she's already been asking me what I do in the Senate (I made sure not to tell her anything that would scare her) but now after everything that's happened, I might have to convince her otherwise.

And even though it was very difficult at first, I think I've finally come to terms with everything. I've even started calling my birth parents Mom and Dad, which I never thought I'd be able to do. Everyone lives on Naboo now and I've tried to visit with them as much as possible. A few years ago, when my life was first threatened, I went back to Naboo and lived with my parents there, which was nice for everyone. They really didn't want me to come back to Coruscant, even though I know they understand why I had to. I've also made sure not to tell them too many details about the attacks...I don't want to worry them anymore than necessary, especially since there's nothing they can really do to help me.

I'm sure you're probably wondering about my adopted family. They were very supportive and willing to answer any questions I had. But when I started to get closer to my birth parents, they started to keep their distance a little more and now I really don't hear from them too much. I still keep in regular contact with my adopted brother, Gwydion, and it's nice to talk to him, especially since we grew up together and no matter what, he's still my brother.

I know it's hard for you, Anakin, to accept your brothers as family but you might be missing out on something amazing if you don't let them in. I know as a Jedi it would be difficult for you to have regular contact with them but it wouldn't hurt you to reach out to them, especialy since things were left between you on such bad terms.

Those dreams you described about your mother seem very serious. It's awful...I can't imagine that and not knowing if she's alright. There has to be some way you can contact her to make sure she's alright. And even if you can't, I might be able to somehow, probably more easily than you could. Please let me know if I can help.

I wish I could be happy that you're able to confide in the Chancellor but I honestly can't. Maybe he's different outside of the Senate when politics aren't involved. I'm sorry...I just haven't been able to trust him after everything happened with the Trade Federation. Perhaps you just see a different side to him than I do on a regular basis. Either way, I would be careful around him if I were you...there's just something about him that doesn't feel right to me.

You still have those fish?? I can't believe they're still alive...you must have taken very good care of them if they're still alive.

Why would Obi-Wan not want us to be by ourselves? What does the attachment rule have anything to do with it? Is it because we were friends ten years ago? I can't understand why that would be a problem. There's nothing wrong with us being friends, especially since we're still friends, at least I hope we are.

I know you don't understand why I won't sleep in the same room as Captain Typho or Dorme but please don't fight me on this. Despite what you said before, I do understand how much danger I'm in. I really do. I should be dead right now and who knows what's going to happen the next time whoever's doing this tries to kill me. I'm not sure who could be behind this...to be completely honest, I've certainly made enough enemies in the Senate over the years that it could be any number of people.

It's just that...I'm not going to let this person control my life. I'm going to continue on with my life and my business as if nothing is wrong because if I don't, my attacker wins. I have to keep my life as normal as possible, even if it's just sleeping alone in my own room. I know it could be dangerous but as I said before, I won't let this person control my life.

If it makes you feel better, I'll make sure R2 is on alert.

I'm going to go to bed now but I just wanted to let you know...I'm really glad you're back in my life.

Padme


	35. Note 35 Anakin

Padmé,

Like I said before, if you want to call me Ani, go ahead. I gave you permission. I really do not care if you call me that. I will only allow you to call me that or my mother. If you do not want to call me that, that is fine by me too.

Obi-Wan is 35 and I'm 19. I'm sorry if I took your comment too negatively…it's just that I'm a little tense with everything that's been happening….my training with Obi-Wan, the attempt on your life, the protection assignment.

I'm not exactly sure what my brothers and father do…yes, they are moisture farmers, and they do harvest water, but they also grow plants in some cave somewhere, and they sell their plants to different customers throughout the galaxy. I didn't stay that long, so I don't know very much about it.

Your point about Owen's view is well taken. I do know that people have different points of view…and that's what's so hard sometimes. Take the Senate for example….you NEVER get anything done because of the different points of view. I don't think the system works. We need someone to make everyone agree, and then things would get done.

It's worse than frustrating! Obi-Wan's overly critical, and like I said before, he NEVER listens. You sound as if you still see us in separate age categories, as if I'm not grown up yet. I am grown up now! Obi-Wan still treats me like I'm the 9 year old that I was when he first started training me, and practically EVERYONE treats me like that. I HATE it!

Yes, it would be neat if you could see my fish, except I don't think Mr. Follow-The-Code-Exactly would allow it. It's not part of our mission; so Obi-Wan probably wouldn't let us go to the Jedi Temple so that you could see my room.

Well, no matter what, we will get to the bottom of this…we will find out who your killer is. Yes, I can sense everything going on in your room….and I…Obi-Wan's looking at me so I'll have to finish this later.

Well…I barely talked to Owen. At least he was nicer that Rhun. He seemed to be all right, but I don't think he wanted me to leave so soon. At least he was nice to me…if I got to know him well maybe we could get along pretty well, but the only thing is he didn't seem to like Jedi and our Force Sensitivity very well. He told me it didn't seem to be practical enough for him. My family owns a moisture farm, and they farm all the time. Force Sensitivity is hereditary, but not every child born to a Force Sensitive parent is Force Sensitive, and it happened that I was the only one that was Force Sensitive.

Wow, your people must have liked you well and thought that you did a really good job if they tried to amend the constitution so that you could serve another term. (I heard that they tried to do this). It seems like you have good politicians coming from your planet…I heard they did the same thing in the Senate for Palpatine,…the Senators extended his term, but I know they gave him extra terms. I'm glad that you took the Senator position. I'm sure you're doing a fine job.

Do you think Count Dooku is behind the attempts to kill you? Obi-Wan and I have been discussing it. Hmmm…..I don't know. Count Dooku was once a Jedi Knight, but he quit the Order 10 years ago….as a matter of fact, he quit at about the same time I became Obi-Wan's Padawan…right after the Naboo Invasion, which is a little strange. He was one of the oldest and most well respected Jedi. Obi-Wan has told me a little about Dooku. Did you know that Qui-Gon was Dooku's apprentice? I'm not sure if he would do something like that or not, but if you think that he might be behind the attempts, well then maybe he is.

Well whoever is behind the attempts, we will find out, I promise you. I don't care what Obi-Wan says about it not being part of our mission. He needs to realize that sometimes it's better to imply more into the mission then what the Council assigns us. It would be stupid to protect you without knowing who was behind the attempts…..if we found out who was behind the attempts, we could STOP that attempts.

I'm…..touched that you would think of me – worrying about me not being able to see my mother, whether or not I would make friends, and if I was lonely. I won't lie to you. Actually, I did struggle with all of that. That is part of the reason that I was so glad that Palpatine has been such a good friend. He helped me through those times. It took several years before any of the other Padawans would talk to me. I had a hard time making friends, and I felt like Obi-Wan resented having to train me. He didn't recognize the fact that I have real feelings. Finally, we did talk about it, and things got better for a while. Now things are starting to get worse between us again. It doesn't really work to talk to him – he just doesn't listen to me. He doesn't understand where I'm coming from. He doesn't understand how I could have feelings for my mother because he never knew his parents. He doesn't understand how I could have feelings for anyone at all….because Jedi just aren't supposed to have emotions. I can't help it – I do anyway. It does no good to try to tell him because he just yells at me for not being able to do what every other Jedi is able to do – live a life without emotions. I'm not able to live a life without experiencing emotion, but I can fake it. I have had to do that the last few years, and I think that I've tricked him.

Well, I'm glad things worked out for you in the Senate with Bail – but still – your example isn't the same thing. You're not with someone who has no idea how you even function and what your deepest thoughts are – because he does not understand these things, nor does Obi-Wan want to. He thinks that how he is should be how I am….and so…..it's just not going anywhere. I'm not saying that I haven't learned anything from him….and I guess he does think that I'm ready for the Trials. If he really thinks that I'm ready, why doesn't he try to put me through the Trials? He has a lot of talk, but nothing is being done.

Thanks. I just hope that my mother is safe now.

Thank you for telling me about your real family. So….you were adopted and now you know who your birth parents are? You are real royalty. Wow…..I guess that…..nevermind. Do your parents expect you to find someone else who is royalty to marry? I don't understand how that whole thing works….do your parents have an arranged marriage for you?

So you have a sister – Sola? If she has kids, then I would guess that she is married, right? Is her husband someone who is royalty from another planet, or is he a normal person….and do you parents like him? And how did he propose to her? I'm really glad that you have a sister and that you've gotten to know her.

In all my years of Jedi training, I never heard of this Royal Force thing that you're talking about. I can see what you're saying -- it must be very different than our Jedi Force. I know nothing about it, but if it has anything to do with emotions, like what you said…then the Jedi would be against it. No wonder they don't want anyone to learn about it. What does it do?

I wish that I could meet your family. Your nieces sound neat….the younglings at the Jedi Temple are a lot of fun to be around. I've had to baby-sit some of them before, and so I got a chance to play with them. Your parents are going to have to be told about the attacks. Do they know about the landing platform or what just happened with the centipedes? You don't have to tell them much, but I think they should know. They have a right to know because they are your parents. Since I'm in charge of your protection, I am suggesting that you tell them. You don't have to mention me at all – if it helps them feel at ease. They might get worried if they learn that a Jedi is protecting their daughter.

You never mentioned your adopted brother Gwydion to me before. I'd like to know more about him and maybe meet him someday. After all, he is still your brother even if you are not biologically related.

Maybe some day I will talk to my brothers again – just not right now – not with Obi-Wan and the Council wanting to put me through the trials. I don't want to do anything that would make them against me. I'd like to contact my mother, but I think that's off limits right now – the Council is so worried about attachments…and I can fake one, but if I were to have contact with two people that I care about, I don't know if I could be able to maintain the cover on my first one. I don't know if I'll be able to do that anyway. I'll probably give myself away sometime soon…..but I can't help it. You better not contact my mother. If you do, the Council would know that I put you up to it. Until I can make sense out of these dreams – I don't know if they are just nightmares or if they are some sort of Jedi vision. I think they might be a Jedi vision, but there's nothing I can do about it now. I have to go with you to Naboo for your protection.

What do you mean that you can't trust Chancellor Palpatine? Obi-Wan and some of the other Jedi are giving me a hard time because of my friendship with him. They even slandered him as some sort of sick joke just to test me. It really made me angry. They don't like him because he's a politician. I should note that Obi-Wan feels the same about you as he does about Palpatine. The Chancellor was there with you when you had problems with the Trade Federation. I know he did everything in his power to help you and your people. He's the type of person who likes to help and serve the people of the Republic. That's why he doesn't like Count Dooku. Count Dooku is selfish. But all that aside, Chancellor Palpatine is my best friend right now. I've told him everything that has happened in my life, and he has always been there to listen to me. He is very understanding, and he never yells at me when I tell him about mistakes I've made. He's the most encouraging person I have ever met. I meet with him whenever I can when I'm on Coruscant. He's just a nice guy who has a big job. It must be hard to be the Supreme Chancellor of the Senate. Maybe it's just that he's tired and under a lot of stress when you talk to him. You told me that you think there's something not right about him. On this point, I don't think you could be more wrong.

You wrote:

"Why would Obi-Wan not want us to be by ourselves? What does the attachment rule have anything to do with it? Is it because we were friends ten years ago? I can't understand why that would be a problem. There's nothing wrong with us being friends, especially since we're still friends, at least I hope we are."

My response:

It's….complicated. No, there would be nothing wrong with us being friends…I don't think Obi-Wan or the Jedi Council would mind that. But certain people in the Jedi Council are convinced that……that I would break the Jedi Code and then worse stuff would happen. They don't trust me; some of them are convinced that I'm going to be a Sith someday. It makes no sense, but they think that if there is any possibility that I could break the Jedi Code it will definitely lead to me turning evil. There's more to it than that, but it would be best if that is all I say for now. I'll just say this, though – I think that they are worried that if we get to become friends that we might become more than friends if we are alone together. As I said before, Jedi aren't allowed to have emotions of any kind, and if I developed any sort of feelings for you beyond just being a good friend, then that would be an attachment. They are trying to rid me of all attachments, though they will never be able to. Sigh……I might be in danger of saying too much here….but you asked. The problem is that I already have an attachment for you, and they know it. When someone becomes a friend of mine, then they are not just a friend. I care about their well-being – it's hard to explain. I don't expect you to be able to understand. I admired you and cared for you ten years ago, and I've never been able to get rid of the "attachment." Obi-Wan and the Council know this. I think they are afraid of this attachment being built up more.

All right, I'm back now……

Wow……almost as soon as Obi-Wan and I started talking, we both sensed that there was danger in your room, and we ran in. I hope we didn't wake you too much, but it was important that you knew that someone made another attempt on your life. Those Kouhuns looked pretty nasty. Aren't they a form of giant centipede? I read about them once and found out that just one sting from their stinger is enough to kill a full grown human. You bet that in an instant I had my lightsaber out and I killed those two centipedes with one blow. Then Obi-Wan noticed the droid thing at the window that had delivered the centipedes, so he actually jumped through the window! Did you see that?

As soon as I saw Typho and Dorme rush into your room, I went outside to find a speeder. It didn't take me long to find one…..but it took a little while to find one that actually worked. Anyway, I jumped in and went to find Obi-Wan. I saw him…and then some Bounty Hunter started shooting at him, and he fell. I flew the speeder to a spot directly under Obi-Wan, and he fell in. After that we went on this wild chase. Obi-Wan was about to kill me…he doesn't like flying that much, and then he started turning green and he threw up. That didn't stop me though…..I didn't even slow down because of him. I LOVE flying, especially flying fast. The assassin kept trying to lose me, but it couldn't….and Obi-Wan thought I was crazy. He kept yelling at me, and then we went right through the section of the planet that had power couplings. It takes a really skilled pilot to be able to maintain control after going through a power coupling, but I was able to do it. At one point…by using the Force I KNEW that the assassin would be at a certain place at a certain time, so I turned the speeder and went in the opposite direction that the other ship was going in. Obi-Wan REALLY yelled at me then. He wouldn't let me explain, so I just stopped the ship at that spot and I jumped. I landed on the assassins ship and I held on tight. The assassin tried to shoot me, and tried to speed up really fast or slow down suddenly, but I managed to hold on. I lost my lightsaber, but Obi-Wan saw me and caught it (probably with the Force.) During the struggle for the assassin to get rid of me, a gun accidentally went off and hit the ship's engine. The speeder crashed to the ground, but I jumped off of it in the last second. I hit the ground hard, but only got a few bruises. My landing hurt, but I started running after the assassin the second I got on my feet. I saw the assassin go into this bar type place (we landed in a REALLY bad section of Coruscant). I was just about to go inside when Obi-Wan caught up with me and gave me my lightsaber back, and then we went inside.

That place was terrible! I swear…the worst people in the galaxy were all gathered together in that bar. All the people there were low lives and druggies, and the place was dirty. There was Death Stick smoke all over the place, and oh….I did NOT like being in there. Obi-Wan told me to go look for the assassin while he got a drink. That made me mad. The assassin must have recognized us because it went right for Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan sensed it and cut off the assassin's arm and then Obi-Wan and I dragged the assassin out of there. I was GLAD to be out of that place because it was starting to make me sick, and I did NOT like those people inside of there. We laid the killer on the ground and we questioned her. I finally got angry and yelled at the creature…and it started talking. It said he was hired by a Bounty Hunter….but then Obi-Wan and I heard this noise, and the next thing we knew the assassin was dead. We looked around and noticed some person with strange armor and a jet pack leave quickly. After Obi-Wan and I looked at the body, we noticed a strange dart that neither one of us had ever seen.

Obi-Wan and I then went to the Jedi Temple to report our findings. Mace Windu (head of the Jedi Council) told Obi-Wan that he was to find out where the dart came from and to identify who had hired that assassin. Obi-Wan then pointed out that you still needed protecting….and you'll never guess this….but Mace Windu told me that I was to handle that! I could not believe it! The Council actually gave me an assignment on my own, and it was the assignment of protecting you! I then said that getting you to leave Coruscant would be difficult since you were the leader of the Loyalists. Mace Windu told me to go to Palpatine for help. I'm to take you to Naboo, and we are to travel as fugitives.

I did as the Council asked and I went to Palpatine. I explained the entire situation to him, and he listened to me, just as he always has. He was pleased that the Council finally gave me an assignment on my own. He's always told me that it would happen eventually. He told me that he would give you an executive order to leave…so I assume he has, am I right? Well towards the end of our conversation he told me that I was the most gifted Jedi he has ever met (as he has often told me), and that he was confident that I would become the most powerful Jedi ever….even more powerful than Mace Windu or Yoda. That man always knows the right things to say…he's always been pushing me to achieve my greatest.

Now that I have this assignment on my own, there are a few things that I feel I must clear up with you. I will try to leave you as much privacy as the job of protecting you will allow. Obviously I'm not going to follow you to the bathroom or showers. I'll stand guard at the bathroom door…because I have to do that. I also might sometimes sleep on the floor in your room….if I think there's reason that you might be in especially high danger. But if you go on any dates with anyone, I'm going to have to go with you to make sure that the person you're going with isn't going to kill you or something. I know it would be awkward, but I have no choice. You're especially going to be in danger with dates…because someone might try to kill you if they think they can be alone with you. Again, it's for your protection. I hate doing this, but I have no choice.

One more note of understanding….I'm not a psycho. I won't hurt you in any way, and I certainly won't touch you in any way. You'll have to trust me on this. I know you're probably going to feel uncomfortable with me being so near you all the time, but you're going to have to try to trust me. I won't rape you or anything stupid like that. I'm against sex before marriage, and I would never hurt a girl like that. I would never hurt a girl period. I just want you to know that I'm not going to hurt you or anything. I'm just here to protect you.

Okay, so do you have a boyfriend, are you engaged, or do you have a husband? I need to know so that I know who you trust and who you don't trust. I'll also need to know so that I can research them. I don't want to have to deal with them….but if you do have a guy….I need to know. I can guess that you will probably have a boyfriend sometime in my protection services….. and I don't see how any guy your age would not want to take you out on a date….so if you DO have a date sometime….remember that I have to come along. I really don't want to get into your private life, but as I said in my last message, I have little choice. I'm going to try my VERY best not to annoy you or cause you too much discomfort. If you and a guy start making out, I don't know what I'm going to do….because technically I'd HAVE to be there to make sure he doesn't murder you. But I do know you a little, and I do know that you have good judgment, so if you let me know ahead of time, I can kind of leave the room so that you have a little more privacy. I'd stand outside the door, but I don't want to ruin your fun.

Another thing; you should tell all your friends and those close to you that you are being protected by a Jedi Knight…but only your close friends. This is so you don't worry them if they go looking for you and can't find you because I've taken you with me on a mission.

Well what did you think of our little meeting? You haven't changed THAT much since I last saw you. If you hadn't told me in the last message, I would have recognized you. You probably wouldn't have been able to recognize me though….since I was only 9….and now I'm 19…and I've changed a LOT from when I was 9…..and you haven't changed THAT much since you were 14. Yes, you've changed some, but I still could have recognized you. So what do you think of me now that we've met?

As for me…just so you know…..I haven't had any girlfriends or anything. Since I started the Jedi Training when I was 9…..I lost almost 10 years of the training that most Jedi get…so they had to intensify my training to make up for those years, plus at the same time learn what I was supposed to be learning at that time. It wasn't too bad. I just had very intense training…but I managed to catch on. I'm better than any one else my age now…so I guess I'm doing pretty well. The training came easy for me. However, due to the amount of it that I had to learn, I never had time to really get to know a person of the opposite sex, nor would I have been allowed. I have wanted to have a girlfriend as far back as I can remember, but I never tried to get to know anyone because I knew that Obi-Wan would take me before the Council…and I might even get expelled…not that I would let that stop me from having a relationship. It was mostly because of my training…..my training took up most of my time, and I didn't feel it was right to have a girlfriend when I couldn't devote the time that she deserved to her. I feel that the girl deserved more than what I could give her. I've had a ton of crushes, but I never approached any of them because I knew I would never be able to give them my time while still in training. I feel that the best relationships are the ones founded on friendship. I want to be my girlfriend's best friend…and I want to like the girl for who she is on the inside, and not because of her body. I don't think enough people really KNOW each other in relationships. I need to find a girl that would accept all that, and would pretty much feel the same way I do. I am also, as I have already said, against sex before marriage….but I also don't want to see the girl naked, or half naked, or anything like that. I don't want the girl seeing any part of me that is usually covered up with clothing. I'm just not the lusty kind of person. I would like to find a girl that could accept that. I don't want you to get the idea that I don't like romance. I do…but it has to be done tastefully. I would like to put my arm around a girl, to kiss her on the lips, to hold her hand, and to hug her….and that's as far as I want to go… ….until marriage. I also would like to go on walks with her. I have TALKED to girls to try to get to know them, but I've never gone out with anyone. None of the girls I have ever talked to fit. Maybe I'm too picky. Oh well, I just CAN'T go against my standards, and I won't. Yeah, I know you're probably thinking I'm weird and that I'll never find anyone. Eventually I will….I'll just have to look real carefully.

And you hit something…I'm actually not allowed to have feelings like that for a girl. Attachment is forbidden in the Jedi Order. I never fully understood that rule because love in its purest form is the essence of the Jedi Code. We are supposed to have compassion for others, yet we're not allowed to love anyone romantically. I believe that compassion is agape love…..which should be the kind of love in romantic relationships…..so you might say that we are encouraged to love. Jedi are not allowed to get married, and if they do, they are expelled from the Jedi Order. I don't think that's fair at all. A person cannot help falling in love….and I believe that there should be no rule against love. It's just not fair. That's one rule that I am very willing to go against…

At any rate, we will be leaving VERY soon, so pack your things; I don't know how long we'll be gone.

I also wanted to let you know that I think you're very brave and strong….about not letting your attacker control your life.

Sincerely,

Anakin


	36. Note 36 Padme

Author - lady_sapphire (at the Jedi Council forums)  
.?usr=1163508

Anakin,

It's nice of you to offer to let me call you Ani, but I think I really should call you Anakin. Besides, I get the feeling you would prefer that anyways and it will help me start to realize that you aren't a little ten year old boy anymore.

I understand what your conflict with Obi-Wan is, I really do. You're not going to like this, but sometimes I feel the way you do when I'm speaking with Chancellor Palpatine. It always seems like he's never truly listening to what I have to say. It's as if he's just telling me what I want to hear and then turning around and doing something completely different than he said he would. It's beyond frustrating. You asked me before why I didn't trust him and it's difficult to pinpoint what exactly triggered it but it's been slowing building ever since the Trade Federation attacks on Naboo. I still find it very hard to believe that there was nothing he could do during the trials...the courts sided with the Trade Federation every single time. He's from Naboo for gods' sakes! That was his home planet being attacked and he did nothing to ensure it would never be attacked again by the Trade Federation. The only reason I can think of for his failure to act is because he had some hidden agenda. As I'm sure you can probably tell, this is still a very sore subject for me. But...I'm sorry, I didn't mean to rant...aynways, I do understand what it feels like to not have your ideas heard.

While you certainly make a valid point about the Senate and us not getting anything done, what else would you suggest? Would it better for us to let everyone fend for themselves? I suppose there's something to be said for using force to get things done but you still can't force someone to believe something or to not believe it. You can't force ideas on someone and I think that's the beauty of democracy. Everyone has the right to say what they believe and try to sway others to their point of view and everyone also has the right to dissent, to a certain degree. It's that freedom that keeps us from killing each other every day. Without that, there would be complete chaos, blood in the streets, and everyone would constantly be in danger. That's why I've been fighting so hard against the Military Creation Act. It's the potential for harm that I'm afraid of and what the power having a galactic army could do. I don't see any good from having an army like the one that's been proposed but I'm guessing you probably feel differently than I do.

That being said, I appreciate your acknowledgement of my work in the Senate. It definitely hasn't been easy but I do love my job. Just to part of something that matters, that could make a difference in at least one person's life, is enough to get me out of bed in the morning. And I have to say that I really respect the path you've chosen as well. To have overcome everything that you did to get where you are now (even if you think you should be further) is really extraordinary, Anakin. Even the Chancellor has told me how skilled you are...and even though I've had my conflicts with having the Jedi around me in the past, I'm glad you were the one chosen to protect me. In spite of everything, I feel safe you and I trust you to keep me from harm.

I'm sorry it was difficult for you at the Temple. I was hoping it wouldn't be. But it sounds like you did start to feel more comfortable there eventually. I don't know why but I just had this vision of you having the time of your life there, making friends left and right, and forgetting all about me. I'm sorry it wasn't like that for you. It's too bad your relationship with Obi-Wan has gone the way it has. I know you were dealing with having to leave your mother and your home behind but you should remember too that Obi-Wan was also having to deal with losing his Master and then suddenly being responsible for a ten year old boy he hardly knew. I'm not trying to make excuses for him; I'm just trying to help you.

I really have no idea who could be behind my attacks. I guess Count Dooku could be a possibility even though I've never had any interaction with him at all. Another strong possilbity is Nute Gunray, the former head of the Trade Federation. He probably hates me more than anyone else in the galaxy for the way things turned out for him. If I had to guess, I would probably say him just for the fact that he would want revenge against me for more personal reasons than political. I basically destroyed his career. I suppose that's a pretty good reason to want someone dead.

I understand what you meant when you said you can't live a life without emotions. My whole life seems to have been driven by emotions, albeit varying ones. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this whole Royal Force thing but it's completely powered by emotions. I feel things much more strongly than the average person, particularly empathy I've found, but I'm also able to maintain control over what I feel, which is extremely helpful in stressful situations. By being able to stay calm, I can stay focused, level-headed, and think things through before I act. I think it has a lot to do with why I've been able to be successful in politics. I know I've been called unemotional in the media before but that couldn't be further from the truth. I feel very strongly...I'm just better at controling it than most.

Given my own history with adoptive and birth families, I can understand why you wouldn't necessary want to get to know your brothers. After all, what effort did they make to find you? I guess, on the other hand, they might have thought you didn't want to be found. Maybe in a few years or so, after you've taken the trials and are settled in as a Jedi Master, you'll want to reach out to them. I know when my birth parents first contacted me, I was furious with them for giving me up and for my adoptive parents for lying to me for so many years. But I will never regret getting to know Sola. Having a sibling is a great gift and in your case, you have several.

I know you mentioned you'd like to meet my family and now that we're going to Naboo, I guess you will eventually. I took your advice and told them everything, even though I spared them some of the scarier details. Before I wasn't really telling them how much danger I was in because I didn't want to worry them but now I see I probably just made them even more worried by not telling them. I did tell them you were my protector; I know they've heard of you (you're still known as a hero on Naboo, you know) and I'm sure they would be honored to meet you. My sister, her children, my adopted brother Gwydion, and my best friend Sabe are also on Naboo right now and I would really like to see them as well if it's safe for them. The last thing I want to do is put them in any unnecessary danger but I would really like to see my family and I would really like you to meet them.

Thank you again for stopping the bounty hunter last night. I don't even want to think about what would have happened if you'd gotten there a second later. That was very brave of you to chase after the bounty hunter the way you did. It's too bad you couldn't have gotten the information you needed out of him before he was killed...maybe our lives wouldn't be so complicated right now. But I trust Obi-Wan will track down whoever hired the bounty hunter and then everything can just go back to normal.

Since you're asking for the benefit of my protection, no, I do not have a boyfriend. And no, I do not have an arranged marriage set up. I can marry whoever I want. Trust me, you don't have to worry about tagging along on any dates with me. I haven't had time for a boyfriend since...well, since I was fourteen I think. But seriously though, Anakin, I don't see what my personal life has to do with you and I don't appreciate your suggestion that someone I would choose to date could potentially want to kill me.

That being said, I really wish you would explain what all this talk about breaking the code is about. I just don't understand. How could you break the code with me? I understand you having an attachment to me since we were friends long ago but I don't see how that would affect you now and with this mission. Besides, it sounds like breaking the code would be alright with you. Why would you want to do that? You've always wanted to be a Jedi. Why would you risk that dream? And all your details about what you're looking for in a girl concerns me. I know that Jedi can't marry. They can't have girlfriends. They can't fall in love. Rules are rules, Anakin. You can't just pick and choose which ones you want to follow. You have to follow all of them or none of them. And I still don't see what this has to do with me. We're friends, aren't we? How does our friendship potentially break the code? I really wish you would be honest with me about this. I can tell you're hiding something from me and I really wish you wouldn't.

Well...I'm sorry if I've seemed rude or testy...but I think the stress of all these attacks is finally starting to take its toll on me. I guess everyone reaches their breaking point eventually. I'll be ready to leave soon. I know Queen Jamilla will want to see me as soon as we arrive to discuss my security. Also, I have a feeling she will suggest we stay at the Lake Retreat since it's in the country and not very easy to get to. Do you remember the Lake Retreat? Maybe we'll finally get to go on that picnic.

I'm sorry I didn't get to see your fish.

Padme


	37. Note 37 Anakin

Note 37

Padmé,

Suit yourself. I already told you that I don't care if you call me "Ani." Call me whatever you want. Anakin will be just fine.

That's exactly why I think there should be one person in charge of everyone……someone wise….to tell everyone else what to do. Don't you think that would be a good idea instead of some people looking for personal gain and some people looking to help the people or planet?

Yes...I know that when someone says a dictatorship, then bad things automatically come to mind, but I believe that a good dictatorship could work. If the system works well, and everyone is treated fairly, then why would it be so wrong? If it works better than the system we have now…things would go a lot smoother. If the right person were in charge there would be no problems. If someone…like Palpatine were in charge, you know that the Republic would be in good hands. You know how great a leader Palpatine is…..and you know Palpatine is an excellent leader and that he actually does care for citizens. He cares about me…a Jedi Padawan. If the Republic had people like him as leaders, things would never go wrong for the Republic. Palpatine's the kind of person that would keep every citizen, every system in mind and carefully decide what was best for each system. You can't tell me that Palpatine couldn't do a good job.

Well Palpatine tries to do what is right.

Yes, Palpatine is a good leader. I'm glad that he got elected Supreme Chancellor 10 years ago. LOL, I was scared of him then. Can you believe that? I can't believe I was that silly as a little kid.

All right, so we do not agree about Palpatine. Fine. I cannot speak for him. I think you are misinterpreting his reactions. He is very smart, and he has a lot on his mind. Sometimes I don't think he likes things that I say, but then he gives me assurances that he does value me. I can talk to him for you, if you would like. Just let me know. He sometimes doesn't look like he is paying attention, but he has so much to deal with, especially with the Separatists. You have to understand that, Padme. He also had no control over what happened with the Trade Federation in the Courts. He is only the Supreme Chancellor. He doesn't have the power to make the Court's decisions…unless the Senate gives him that power. I wouldn't care if he did have that kind of power. You are expecting too much of him and blaming him for everything that has happened in this galaxy. Sigh….Palpatine have hidden agendas? What are you talking about, Padme. You're sounding just like Obi-Wan now. You know, Obi-Wan thinks those things about you, too.

Yeah, I know about the social contract theory stuff you were talking about. I'm not against having a government; I'm just saying that I don't think the system that we have right now works.

No, you're not boring me; you never could bore me. I think it's normal to go on and on about things that you're passionate about. I do the same thing.

LOL adventures? All the time!!!! When you get Obi-Wan and me together, you never know what to expect. You want to know about some of my earlier missions? Hmm…..let's see……there are so many…I'll try to pick out the good ones, okay? Well I already told you about the slave rescue, which wasn't technically a mission. There was one mission that I went on when I was about 15 or so where the Jedi Council sent us to some planet outside of the Republic. They sent us there because the residents of that planet were causing problems for nearby Republic worlds, and Obi-Wan and I were sent to stop the conflict. Well when we got to the planet we found that soldiers were being equipped with deadly weapons, and the warriors attacked in little groups. Obi-Wan and I would fight off and destroy an entire section of warriors, and then we'd move on to the next group. The entire time these battles were going on we were trying to find the central factory where the weapons were being manufactured. I'm the one that found the factory, and I'm the one that destroyed it! That ended the conflict quickly.

Yes, I love helping people. There are some times that our missions don't go exactly right. One time Obi-Wan and I were assigned to a system in which the Jedi felt that there were unfair laws. As soon as we arrived we started the negotiation process…only it didn't go so well. We tried to keep it so that it wasn't a heated debate……we tried to establish common ground and, but the other side just wouldn't listen. They started screaming at us, and then they had these assigns tried to kill us, so we went into aggressive negotiations. LOL, that's negotiations with a lightsaber.

(blushes) Thanks for the compliments and encouragement, Padme. It means a lot to me. I just hope I don't make a fool out of myself. I'm glad to be the one protecting you.

I thought Corde was the handmaiden that died….sigh…I'm confused. I get your handmaidens all mixed up. Sorry about that. Anyway, I didn't even know that centipedes were poisonous until Obi-Wan told me that a couple of days ago. That's kind of ironic, isn't it?

I know…I wish that we could have learned who the assassin worked for. I think Obi-Wan's going to try to trace that dart, which should give us a clue as to where the assassin's assassin came from. That person or creature with the jet pack must have followed Obi-Wan, me, and the assassin…and he must have saw what had happened. I don't like that one bit…it's almost as if that were planned. Why would the person with the poison darts only shoot at the assassin and not either Obi-Wan or me?

Yes, I realize that whoever shot the assassin was trying to silence your assassin, but that wasn't what I was talking about. I meant that if the person who shot the assassin was so interested in keeping the information from others hands…..then why didn't he try to shoot Obi-Wan and me too. That would have both silenced the assassin and Obi-Wan and I.

What seems clear is that whoever was hired to kill you used a certain kind of rare poison dart. Obi-Wan told me that he had trouble in the Jedi Archives identifying it. That is saying something. It is not going to be easy for him to track down this assassin, but I know that he will. If it is the Trade Federation or Dooku, then the dart might be able to be traced to them. I guess you could be right about it being connected to the Trade Federation. They have access to a lot of trade goods from all across the galaxy.

Okay, so you usually don't date. Have you ever had a boyfriend? I assume you have….but if you did have a boyfriend, why did you break up? Would you ever be able to have a boyfriend or get married? I know your political life is important to you and I was just wondering. Umm….I didn't mean to insult you, Padme. I was just saying that it is a possibility that a guy could pose as a wonderful guy, and be plotting all the time to kill you. It has happened before to other people. Guys can be deceptive sometimes.

If I have any feelings for you, even friendship feelings towards you, then it would still be an attachment, and thus would STILL be breaking the Code…because I would still be having a feeling of attachment to you. The Council and Obi-Wan do not like the idea of my having any sort of feelings for you at all, on any level. I have admiration for you because you are my friend…..and…..well, Padme. The Council knows, and so does Obi-Wan. I don't know how to explain it to you any clearer. The fact that I have this kind of friendship with you and the feelings behind it is the source of the problem that the Council has with me and you.

As I told you before, I don't follow the Code exactly. If I feel something that goes against the Code is right, I follow that. The fact that I'm not allowed to have attachments is not going to stop me from developing feelings and wanting a relationship with someone. Yes, I have thought about getting married ever since I was little…as soon as I was old enough to know what a girl was, and in the past 10 years I have thought about it everyday. I WILL get married, I promise you. I don't CARE if I'm not allowed to.

Sigh….I refuse to be a slave to the Code. There is a difference between living by the letter of the law and living by the spirit (or intention) of the law. I understand why there is this no attachment rule, but the Jedi Code was made by the Jedi – it is not God's law. If it came from God, that would be one thing. The Jedi Council is an institution that was created by the Jedi to govern Jedi affairs. It is the same sort of thing with governmental laws. Generally, I would follow the Republic laws, but again, those laws were just defined by the citizens of the Republic. Sometimes a law or rule is wrong, and when it is, I will go against it. I will not follow something blindly just because it is a law. A law that forbids emotion and love is wrong. We all have to use discernment when it comes to laws like the Jedi Code. One of my main issues with other Jedi is that they follow the Jedi Code blindly, as if it is a law that came from God. Furthermore, they are following the letter of it instead of the spirit of it. This makes the majority of them slaves to it. That is why the Jedi Order is declining. I have read history books of it, and it is no where near as powerful as it once was. Not everything is as black and white as you think it is, Padme. Not all laws are the same, nor are they all just. If I were to follow all laws in this galaxy down to the letter, then I would be nothing but a slave to it. I know what slavery is like. I don't want to live my life that way!

Breaking the Jedi Code is not going to get me kicked out of the Jedi Order unless I do something really bad.

Of all the people in the galaxy, Padme, I thought that at least YOU would understand. You sound exactly like Obi-Wan, Yoda, Mace, and the rest of the Jedi. Sigh……WHY IS IT ANY OF YOUR CONCERN IF I FALL IN LOVE OR NOT? No rule is going to stop me from falling in love or having a relationship. I can't help falling in love or having emotions. That is just how it is. I'm sorry, Padme, I can't tell you….yes…I am hiding something from you. You just wouldn't understand….and besides, you've made it clear that it is impossible. Just leave me alone right now.

If you understood what I meant when I said that I could not live a life without emotions, then why…..why….why did you go off on me about how I should not have emotions or be experiencing them? I can't help it, Padme. I just cannot be like the rest of the Jedi. Hmmm….so this Royal Force thing is powered by emotions, but that still does not explain its purpose. I can see why the Council does not talk about it.

I'm really glad you told your parents a little more of what is going on. I…..hope that we get to see your parents and family. I would like to meet them as well. You forgot to tell me how your sister's husband proposed to your sister or how he handled the engagement. I suppose he's from some really upper class family on Naboo. And what would someone go about the whole marriage thing with you? I would like to see all of your family and friends as well. I don't see any problem with that.

Well it looks like we made it to the transport safely. I don't like it that I didn't get to fly you to Naboo, but I understand the safety precautions were necessary. I've been hiding my lightsaber underneath my outfit…and so far it doesn't look like anyone has even noticed my Padawan braid or my Padawan haircut, and I don't think anyone has recognized you yet. Do you see anything suspicious? I'll tell you one thing….I'm REALLY tired, so I'm going to try to sleep. I haven't had a full night's sleep in over a month…so maybe I'll be able to sleep here. I hope you don't mind. Wake me up if you see anything unusual. Also, can we stay in the non-smoking section on the transport?

What's your plan once we land on Naboo? It sounds like we will being going to the Naboo palace to meet with the Queen, but do you have any more specific plans? What about seeing your family and friends? Yeah, I remember that lake retreat. I'd like to have that picnic.

Have I shown you my lightsaber yet? It's blue, and I have my initials on the bottom of the handle, and most importantly I built it. Would you like to look at it once we're on Naboo?

How many friends do you have now? I would like to meet your friends. Any friend of yours must be very nice because they have you as a friend.

I guess I'll see you in a few hours.

Anakin


	38. Note 38 Padme

Author - lady_sapphire (at the Jedi Council forums)  
.?usr=1163508  
Anakin,

I'm still having a hard time believing how different our political views are. Since the Jedi are mostly known for wanting peace and order, I would have thought you would feel similarly. And I can see the logic in your argument about having a dictatorship. On the surface, yes, it seems like it could work, probably more easily than our current system. But what you're describing also has another name: absolute power. Nothing good can ever come of that. It would completely destroy any individual rights within the galaxy, putting everyone at the mercy of just one person. That's too much power for anyone to have, especially given that there's no way of knowing what intentions this dictator says (even if they are good, like you assume). At least, with a Republic, we have a system of checks and balances to keep everything under control and to help make sure no one aspect of the government has more power than another.

So...basically, you're saying that everything I've been working for the last nine years has been wasted time because the Senate (which I'm also a part of) never gets anything done. If you don't trust the Senate, does that also mean you don't trust me, like Obi-Wan? Do you not trust my judgment in political matters? Anakin...I don't think you've really thought this through...

Maybe we should just agree to disagree about Palpatine. If I were to really sit down and tell you everything that Palpatine has done over the years to make me uneasy, well, it would just take too much time and I have a feeling it wouldn't do much good anyways. Just promise me something...please don't get too close to him. Don't tell him too much personal information. Don't confide in him too much . You don't want him to know anything

about you he could potentially use against you later. I know we don't see eye to eye on this, but please, just try.

Wow...it sounds like you and Obi-Wan make quite a team. I can't imagine even thinking about doing some of the things you've done and some of the battles you've fought. And here I thought I was pretty capable with combat...maybe you'll need to teach me a few more things just in case. Aggressive negotiations, huh? Is that a technical term? Haha...

Oh...did I say Dorme was the one who was killed? I hope that never gets back to her. But yes, Corde was the one who was killed. I guess that just proves I'm a lot more stressed out than I thought I was. Maybe, if anything, this trip to Naboo will be good for me to just take a break from everything. My parents and sister have been telling me for years that I need to take a vacation but I just haven't been able to find the time to do it. I know this is more of a forced vacation than anything, but that's one way to look at it, right?

I wish you had been able to find out who had hired the assassin too. I think both our lives would be a lot less complicated right now if you had. But anyways...I'm trying very hard not to think too much about whoever is trying to kill me and when or if they'll ever try again. I'm not trying to be ignorant, if that's what you think, it's just that I know if I sit and worry too much about this, I'm going to drive myself insane. I would prefer to put my trust in you to protect me and Obi-Wan to find out who is behind the attacks and try to lead as normal a live as possible.

Since you seem to be so concerned with my personal life, yes, I can have a boyfriend and I can marry whoever I want. I've never really had a boyfriend before. Sure, there have been boys that I liked when I was younger but it never went further than that, especially after I became Queen. And after I became a Senator, I just didn't have any time to even think about having a boyfriend, let alone taking the time to meet anyone. I know you're just trying to protect me, Anakin...but I think you're taking things a little too far. I don't see why you would need to sleep on my floor, especially if you can sense everything that's going on in my room like you did last night. I understand that you take your mission very seriously and while I truly appreciate that, you still need to respect my privacy and my personal space.

Alright, so friendship still counts as an attachment. I understand that. But what I'm still not understanding is why this attachment with me makes the Council and Obi-Wan so uneasy. And since they feel that way, why did they allow you to be my protector, then? I'm not questioning you, Anakin, I'm just trying to makes sense of this.

I do understand what you meant when you said you couldn't live your life without emotions. I really do. Emotions are the main things that drive my entire life. But I'm also able to have some self-control and understand when it's alright to let my emotions rule me and when I need to keep them in check. I think you need to be careful with your emotions, Anakin. It's human to feel and to feel strongly, but you can't let them run your whole life.

That being said, I do understand what you were saying about love and the Code. It just doesn't seem fair for them to be able to say you can't fall in love or get married. In fact, I think being committed to one person, having a solid and stable relationship with that person, could be a very good thing. It could ground you and make you more at peace with yourself and within the galaxy. I don't see why marriage for the Jedi would be a bad thing. After all, even though I believe we can control most of our emotions, I think that love is the one thing we can't control. You're right about this one, Anakin. It just doesn't seem fair. In fact, I think keeping people from falling in love and from being with the person they love could just cause a lot more problems.

So yes, I do care if you fall in love or not because I want you to be happy.

And if being around me puts you in danger of breaking the Code or having an attachment, then maybe you should keep your distance.

Captain Typho just received word that we're supposed to meet with Queen Jamilla within an hour of arrival. My brother, Gwydion, asked if he could meet us at the landing platform and walk us to the palace. I think he, just like the rest of my family, just wants to make sure I'm in one piece. I haven't seen him in years...would it be alright if he met us at the platform?

As for the rest of my family, I'm pretty sure my parents are expecting us to stay with them at their home. I don't know about you, but I don't think this is a good idea, especially since it could potentially put them in unnecessary danger. The only problem is that I don't think they're going to take no for an answer so I'm going to ask Queen Jamilla to 'order' me to stay at the Lake Retreat for my own safety. They won't be ablet to argue with the Queen and I'll sleep better knowing they're out of harms way, for the most part. I would still like to see all of them, though, for at least a few days. My mom told me she's already prepared the spare bedroom for you.

I probably should tell you...I think my family was a little apprehensive when I told them you were my protector. It's nothing against you personally; I think they were just a little nervous about having a padawan protecting me. I told them not to worry, that you were very skilled and that I trusted you so hopefully, they will trust you too. I hope you're not offended...I guess they're just being overprotective of me. I just wanted to let you know in case any of my family members decides to interrogate you when you meet them. My sister, her husband, and my nieces are going to be staying with my parents too, so there's going to be quite the full house. And...now that I think of it, I'm not really sure how Arawn proposed to Sola. I don't think I ever asked her because they were already married when I found out about her and my birth parents.

Yes, I don't think anyone's recognized us yet. That's very good thing. I hope you can get some sleep. You look dead on your feet. If anything though, you should be able to sleep well at the Lake Retreat. If you can't get a good night sleep there, then you can't anywhere.

That's very impressive that you build your own lightsaber. How did you build it? What color is it...I know some Jedis have different color lightsabers. Does the color mean anything or is it just one that you picked for yourself? I hope you don't mind me asking but...could I hold it? I've never held one before and I've always wanted to.

Unfortunately, I don't have too many friends, at least not ones that I'm very close to. It's hard to know who I can trust on Coruscant, especially in the Senate. But I'm still close with Sabe, one of my former handmaidens. You'll get to meet her sometime while we're on Naboo because she's going to staying not too far from the Lake Retreat. I'm sure she'd like to meet you as well.

Get some sleep, Anakin.

Padme


	39. Note 39 Anakin

Note 39

Padmé,

I suppose you're right about it being hard for any one person to rule the galaxy, but I still like the idea. Of course I want peace and order for the Republic. There's nothing about what I said earlier that should have caused you to think that I thought otherwise. What makes you think that I want disorder and chaos? I don't! I do not like the idea of war either. Again, Padme, absolute power isn't necessarily a bad thing. There are people who could wield it without abusing it. Why do you automatically assume that a dictatorship would mean war and disorder? Maybe you're just prejudice against dictatorships.

How would a person having absolute power destroy individual rights within the galaxy? Of course the wrong individual could get into power, but so could a person leading ANY form of government. Even a democracy can be corrupted. You know, it might actually be easier for someone to corrupt a democracy than a dictatorship. Why? Because in a democracy the citizens can be lulled into a false sense of security and rights. All someone would have to do would be to act a certain way, and then deceive people. Then that person could cease all the power. At least with a dictatorship, people would already know the person had absolute power. They could fight against it.

What if the people could kick the person out of office – if they were bad? Any dictator worthy of ruling the galaxy would have to allow people to vote him/her out of office. The Republic could kind of run how it is now, except without the Senate. The Courts would still be intact, and there would be some people who would have the power to kick the dictator out if he/she was abusing their power. Having a dictator wouldn't be as bad as you think, Padme. Who says you can't have a system of checks and balances within a dictatorship?

Sigh….don't be so difficult. I NEVER accused your work as being useless. I never said it, so don't you dare try to put words in my mouth! The Senate can get things done, but you have to admit that sometimes it is too slow. However I NEVER said I didn't trust the Senate. Don't go equating my disappointment with our current government with…..sigh….you are being impossible! First you accused me of not trusting the Senate, then you equated that "distrust" of the Senate with a distrust of you. STOP IT RIGHT NOW!! I don't want to hear any more. If you have to know, yes I trust you. Yes, I trust your judgment. Do I trust your judgment in political matters? I don't know. I don't know everything you think about political issues. The Jedi don't really get concerned with politics.

You have no right to ask me not to get close to someone. Palpatine and I are friends, and that's that. He and I have been friends since the first time he talked to me. I don't see why it bothers you so much that I'm close to him anyway. Are you afraid that if the two of you disagree, I'm going to follow Palpatine and ignore your political ideas? You have Palpatine all wrong. He would never use anything I say against me later. He already knows a lot about me. There are some subjects, though, that I can promise to never bring up with him -- like I'm not going to tell him about my thoughts of breaking the Jedi Code. He'd think badly of me, and I don't want to lose his respect. Something's telling me not to bring it up with him.

Yeah….Obi-Wan and I do make quite a team, as you put it. Obi-Wan told me that they finally started the trials on me. (smiles) Well, I suppose there is a thing or two I could teach you about combat. Umm….where do you want to start? LOL….is aggressive negotiations a technical term? Well….not exactly. Obi-Wan and I kind of made it up. Glad you like it, though.

Yeah….you could say that this is a sort of forced vacation. I know it feels like a vacation to me.

Well your point about the guy with the jet (I'm almost a hundred percent sure it was a guy just by the way he moved in the few seconds that I got to look at him. I can usually tell those things pretty quickly) is well taken, but it still seemed as if there was something more behind his actions. I'm not sure exactly what, but like I said before….it was almost as if we were meant to discover that dart for whatever reason. The guy with the jet also looked like a bounty hunter…and usually when bounty hunters work together they stick together during their jobs. The female assassin said she was working for a bounty hunter before she was silenced. Why would a bounty hunter have another bounty hunter go after their own job? Something just isn't right about the whole thing. If the bounty hunter were so afraid of Jedi why would he have used that dart on that assassin when he could have used a more common weapon? Obi-Wan said he'd never seen anything like that dart before. Surely that dart can be tracked, and Obi-Wan will look for the bounty hunter. I think the bounty hunter did that on purpose, but I have no idea why. I agree with you; we should both live our lives as normally as possible until Obi-Wan learns more. I'll let you know what I hear anything from him. Just so you know, it might be dangerous for Obi-Wan to try to contact us while we're on Naboo. Someone might trace it. Because of that, communication between him and me will be very limited. As I said before, I'll do everything that I can to protect you.

Good. I'm glad to hear that you can have a boyfriend and can marry whoever you want. I'm also pleased to hear that you never had a boyfriend before. That makes us even, and it means that neither of us have any baggage from relationships. It's better that way. Um…..okay….I'm sorry about the comment I made about maybe needing to sleep on the floor in your room. I was just…..thinking that it might be something we'd have to consider….but only in extreme circumstances. You're right…I can sense everything going on….but still…..I was awake when the assassins tried to kill you. What if I'm asleep and it happens? It really won't be a concern unless the wrong individual finds out you're on Naboo. I just want you to be safe. I….I can respect your privacy and personal space. Just let me know if something bothers you, all right?

Well if your sister thinks your romantic life is pathetic, I wonder what she would think of mine.

I have no idea why my having an attachment with you makes Obi-Wan and the Council so uneasy. Well…..actually maybe I do know why. They know how intensely I experience emotion…or rather, they know that I do experience emotion, and they are afraid of it. Also, Obi-Wan sent me a threat in his last message to me. Somehow he knows……and I guess I was a little too open with him about my thoughts. I'm going to have to be a little more careful around him. I said some things to him that I thought I could trust him with. I honestly don't know why they assigned me to protect you. Maybe they just wanted to test me. They've been doing that a lot lately. I know that this probably sounds even more confusing to you. I'm sorry about that…..I just don't know if you'd understand. I'm trying to fight it, and if I let you know what I'm struggling with, I know that the fight will be over. Just hold out a little while longer. If I can fight it off, then you can just forget this whole thing. I'm just a little confused right now…and I need to sort some things out for myself.

Yeah….well….Obi-Wan told me that if I got married to anyone that I'd be expelled from the Jedi Order on the spot. That's different from what Qui-Gon and Yoda said. It seems like the Council has made a decision about me, personally. It's okay for other Jedi to get married, with the Council's approval. But they have decided that I can't. It's just not fair! So you finally agree with me about the love and the Jedi. Thank you!!! At least we do agree on that.

It's kind of impossible for me to keep my distance from you….I'm the one who is in charge of protecting you. I have to be around you, and to not be around you would be disobeying the Jedi Council. Don't worry about the Council or what they say. It doesn't really concern you. I'm the one they're going to be watching carefully.

All right, so what did you think of my lightsaber? Do you like the color? I love that shade of blue. It's my very favorite color. I already told you about the initials and the color, but I thought I'd just add that it was my favorite color. I don't mind hearing about your favorite colors. That information may prove useful in the future…so what is your favorite color?

I can't really be giving away the secrets of how to construct a lightsaber, not even to you. Now that you have actually seen my lightsaber, you know that it is blue. No, the color of a lightsaber doesn't mean a whole lot….well….besides the fact that the more advanced Jedi traditionally have green lighsabers. Blue is more common. However, there can be variations in the shade of the color. It all depends on the crystal used inside the lightsaber. Mace Windu has a purple one. Of course you can hold my lightsaber. Be sure to let me know what you think of it.

I'd love to meet your other friends. I'm sure Obi-Wan is doing the best he can in finding out where the assassin came from, and you'll be back on Coruscant soon. I do have to admit, though, I'm glad that Obi-Wan isn't here….and that it's just me and you. It gives us time alone…..time for me to get to know you better.

What are your interests? (besides politics). I'd tell you my interests, except I'm feeling a little sick. It's my stomach. I'll be all right.

I like to really talk to….to really get to know someone. I believe that's how any relationship should start…friend or otherwise. I also like to make sure that my friends understand what I'm saying and that they don't get bored with me.

You might think that I am serious…jus because I'm a Jedi Padawan, but not all Jedi are serious ALL the time. We do have a sense of humor, at least most of us do.

Don't worry about that comment, all right? You're forgiven for saying it. We all say things that we shouldn't say…we all make mistakes. I know I have made lots of mistakes.

I was glad to go back to Naboo again. That place is so beautiful….nothing like Tatooine or Coruscant. I was glad to meet the new elected queen, but I was a little hurt when you said I was "only a Padawan." I know you must be very upset with all these attempts on your life….and….well….never mind. That was stupid of me to think. It was good to see your family. After we spend some time at your house, we'll see Sabe, right? I really am looking forward to seeing her again. It was nice that your friends Daria and Krilien stopped by too. I wonder what they thought of my lightsaber…and what they thought of me. I hope that I didn't say something out of place or anything. I've never really been in the informal company of upper class people. You said Krilien is interested in the Jedi. Do you know if he's Force Sensitive?

Krillien seems like a really nice guy. Are he and Daria married? It's clear that they care about each other a great deal. They also consider you a dear friend….and I'm glad that you have such kind people as your friends. I'm glad that Krillien admired my lightsaber; it's something that I'm very proud of. Yes, please ask Krillien if he is force sensitive or not; I really would like to know. I don't think he'd be allowed to be trained if he were force sensitive, but between you and me….I could teach him some Jedi stuff…if he wanted it.

Well now that we're at your own house…..I have a couple of things to say to you. Your family seems nice, but I get the feeling that I'm really not welcome there….that they don't really consider me as an equal. Is that true? Did I do okay at dinner? I mean, I didn't know what to say to them. Your sister looks just like you. You never told me much about her….or the other members of your family. I tried to talk to your parents, but they made it clear to me that they didn't really want to talk. Part of it might be from the commonness of my last name. I know that Skywalker is the most common last name in the Republic, at least for humans. Your nieces are cute. Did you ever tell me how old they were? If so, I've forgotten.

Anyway, I think your house is beautiful. I liked your family gardens…and the pond was just amazing….how come you never told me anything about your house?

I also liked meeting your brother. It worked out well that he met us on the landing platform and escorted us to the palace. I haven't seen him around lately, though. Padme, you should know that your family is always welcome wherever we go on Naboo.

Thanks for the warning about your parents. They did interrogate me a little….and your sister…..she seems to think that I'm your boyfriend. That was slightly embarrassing for both of us, I think. I haven't been offended by anything they said. Wait…Arawn is the name of Sola's husband? Interesting. There is an Arawn who contacted me several years ago. I doubt it was him. There have to be more than one person in this galaxy who share that first name. Even though your parents don't seem very interested…I would like to get to know them better.

I have to tell you something else….and this might give us an excuse to go to the Lake Retreat early….but I don't know how long I will be able to stay in your house. Maybe if we could find out what is causing it, then we could hold off leaving for a while – but something in your house seems to be bothering me. I'm allergic to something. I didn't **really** notice it until after dinner, and it went away when I went outside. That means that it is something in your house that might not have been inside when we had dinner. Do you guys have any weird pets or anything? I know I'm not allergic to normal pets like dogs or cats. Maybe it's not a pet…maybe it's something else. I don't know….all I know is that it's getting worse the longer I stay in your house. I'm having some trouble breathing. I'm going to go outside again…..I'll see you in a bit.

My stomach still hurts, too…and that has nothing to do with whatever is bothering me in your house.

Anakin


	40. Note 40 Padme

Jaid Skywalker

.net/u/88042/Jaid_Skywalker

And

Author - My Lady Vader

.net/u/2115252/My_Lady_Vader

Anakin,

I didn't mean to make you think that that's what I thought you wanted, it's just that I thought the Jedi thought differently. I guess everyone is entitled to their own opinions. I still think that absolute power is not a good thing. Yes, I'm sure there are people who could not abuse it, but think about it Anakin, absolute power. It would make anyone, including me, I think, try to do what they want, and not what the people need. I still think it's something to stay away from. As I said before, having a dictatorship would put everyone at the mercy of one person, and if that one person makes a law that they do not agree with, then they are likely to rebel. Wouldn't you?

Maybe not at first, but eventually a person with absolute power would take all the rights away from the people, first to go would be the ability to vote that person out of power. Yes, the wrong person could lead any form of government, but they have less power over the people. In a democracy, the people have a choice. With a dictatorship, they're told what to believe. Yes, they could fight against it, but then it would be a divided galaxy, Anakin. That's not a good thing.

That's the thing, having absolute power would make the person not want to give it up. They would make it to where they can't be voted out. I'm not sure if I want to think about that...with out the senate, who would repersent the people?

I am NOT being difficult! I was merely asking if you thought my work, as I work in the Senate, was useless. Yes, the Senate is slow on deciding, but we also have to think of a whole galaxy full of beings and decide whats good for them, Anakin. And not every senator agrees on everything. In fact, they rarely agree on anything. From my opinion, they Jedi are lucky to stay away.

Anakin, all I'm asking is that you be careful. Please, that's all I'm asking. When you think of him, you see him as a friend, but have you tried looking at him through a stranger's eyes? It's worth a try. What harm could come from it?

It seems rather affective, I could use it on my parents.

I feel restless. I need to be doing something! I feel as though I'm letting all the Naboo down while I hide away from someone.

I have no idea either. Maybe he thought if he hired another bounty hunter, then it would be harder to trace the assassinations to him. Maybe we'll never know. Thank you, Anakin. And be sure to thank Obi Wan for me next time you contact him.

Surprised? Why would you be surprised? I've been so busy with being Queen, then a senator, I've not had time. Better? I don't know....That's alright Anakin. Your just trying to do your job. And I promise that I will contact you if I feel uneasy. If I don't, you may cut off my right hand.

I don't even want to think of what she'd say to you about your romantic life.

Why would they be afraid of it? I'm sure you could trust him, Anakin, he's your friend. Do you think he told the council about the things you told him? Or did he regurgitate Jedi teachings at you? I'm not sure if I do understand, but I'll be here if you need to talk with me. Being confused just makes us fight harder to know whats right.

The Jedi that are married, aren't they trying to perserve their breed? If you were a alien who's breed was dying out, the council would let you marry. Don't you think so? Maybe your reading things into it that aren't there. Yes we do. They are a bit to strict on their love laws.

Well, make sure to give me some personal space while your protecting me...Have I mentioned that I hate the idea of protection and hiding?

I liked your lightsaber. It was beautiful. I love blue as well, but red has always been my favorite color.

When you get more skilled, will you change the color? Can you have colors besides green, purple and blue?

Good. I can't wait for them to meet you! I hope so. Again, I feel so lazy not doing anything. Maybe we should go for a picnic sometime, to get to know each other better.

Well, I love swimming, and planting. Flowers, mostly. But politics make up most of my life. Oh, I'm sorry your not feeling well.

I'm glad to hear that, but it's hard to think of Master Windu or Master Yoda telling jokes, or even laughing at them.

Thank you. I really wish everyone was so forgiving.

I didn't mean anything by it, Anakin. I was nervous, and tired. I get cranky when I'm tired. Yes, Sabe can't wait to see you again. She'll hardly beilive your not that little boy on Tatooine any more.

No, they're not married yet. I really hope they will soon, but they seems to like to take things rather slow.

I'll be sure to ask him. I'm not sure if he would want to train, but it's worth asking.

My parents don't think anyone is their equal. Having royal blood makes them stiff necked and proud. But don't worry about it, Anakin. They'll grow to like you...I hope. Yes, you did fine at dinner. However, I would appreciate if you would refrain from mentioning the 'danger' I'm in. My mother might decide to make me 'retire' from being senator, and I don't want that to happen. I'm sure they were just shy, and there is nothing with the last name Skywalker! Thank you. They liked you as well. Pooja is four, and Ryoo is six.

I don't stay there much, so I don't think if it often. It's never crossed my mind, I guess.

I know. And they know it, too.

Keep trying with them. My parents will eventually open up, they always do.

Well, my parents got a new pet, Angel they call it. I'm not too sure what it is, but I don't like it. That might be why your getting sick.

I hope you feel better soon!

Padme.


	41. Note 41 Anakin

Note 41

Padme,

Padme, you're not letting Naboo down by hiding. Until we know who's trying to kill you, you are in danger. If you went out of hiding now, you could be killed. That wouldn't do Naboo or the Republic any good. I know you don't like the idea of protection and hiding, so we'll just have to make the best of it.

I noticed some embroidery work when we were in your room. Was that your work…I'm going to make the assumption that it was. You like to do embroidery? That's really awesome! That's a very unique talent…..and I don't think I've ever met a girl your age who does it. I would like to see some of the work you've done. Do you have any that I can see?

I also noticed you had some Holo vids in your room. I like to watch things on Holo vids too. What kinds of things do you like to watch? Maybe we could watch one together or something….just to relax. Would you like that? I don't have any with me, but since we're at your house right now…do you have any here? Ah, vid games are fun too! I love them….especially the flying games…..but none of them are like real flying. I also like the adventure kind of games where you have to solve puzzles and find clues and objects and give them to characters in the game so that you can finish your quest. Do you know what kind of game I mean? I don't like the fighting games with a lot of blood and things in them. Those gross me out, and I don't think they serve any purpose.

I also couldn't help but notice some of the drawings in your room. You like to draw? I'll admit that I really stink at it. I've tried to do arty things, but whenever I try to do something, the outcome is always really bad. I really admire people who have an art talent. I would also like to see some of your drawings.

Thank you for showing me all your work. It's so beautiful! You should show it to people more often…and maybe you could make some to sell. I think the public would pay high prices for what you can do. I don't think your drawings are bad at all…in fact I think they're rather breathtaking. Now I'm no art expert, but I liked what I saw. Your work impresses me. I especially liked your drawing of the mountains and the water. Is that place on Naboo?

Do you read? I like to read a lot. What kinds of books do you like?

You know something else? I really like anything to do with the outdoors too. I like to go to different planets and study the plant life and try to figure out what kind of plants or flowers they are….well I do that when I'm not on missions. One time when Obi-Wan and I didn't have to go on another mission for a month, I stayed outside for a week and just lived outside on some green planet….I forget the name of that planet now. I like gardening too, and I love flowers. I wish I had a garden…but as a Jedi Padawan I don't have any land to grow it on….Coruscant is all city and I wouldn't have anyone to care for my plants while I'm off on missions. Now that was just my responses to the things you said you liked to do. I'm glad that you like planting and flowers too…..

Now……I like to do a lot of things. I'm sure you already know these next two things, but I'll mention them to you anyway….I LOVE to fly. I can't really explain why, but I just love it. I guess it's because I'm good at it. I also like to build things and fix things. I still do that in my spare time. I also like to figure out puzzles and to try new things. I love traveling….and seeing the different planets. I would love to go to every single planet. I am working on that….I have a sheet in which I have every name of every planet listed…and I've been crossing off the names.

I'm different from most guys because I don't really like sports…well except racing. I'm not very good at them, and I don't really have an athletic build. I also don't see the point of them…so I'm not into sports or anything.

Well that's all I can think of for now. If I think of anything else I'll just tell you in another letter.

Oh yeah….I'm sure. I'm feeling a lot better now. I think what it was was something to do with my mother. Whenever someone really close to me is in pain, whether they're Force Sensitive or not, I can feel their pain. I don't know if that's normal for a Jedi or not, but I do physically feel their pain. My mother's been in a lot of pain recently, and I can feel it. Sometimes I get physically sick from it, and then it's hard to tell whether it's me that's sick or if it's the person in pain. I only feel the pain of those that are CLOSEST to me….like Obi-Wan, my mother….and if you were to get in pain, I'd probably feel your pain too. I also found that in order for me to feel their pain, they have to be in A LOT of pain. I'm worried about my mother, Padmé. I think I'm feeling my mother's pain. As for medical assistance, as long as it's my mother that is in pain, there is nothing that anyone can do about it. I also try to avoid medical assistance if at all possible…I'm just one of those people that likes to handle their stuff by themselves. I don't like being sick, and as long as I can take care of it, I'll do it. I don't like to have other people know when I'm sick, and I don't like to take medications for anything unless it's absolutely necessary. I don't get medical assistance unless it's necessary either. I've always been like that, and sometimes it's gotten me into trouble. Once…a little before you and Qui-Gon met me…I got REALLY sick and I didn't tell my mother, and my mother was about to kill me because I had to go to the medical center. Anyway, I'm fine right now, and if I do get REALLY sick, I'll tell you. I only let other people know I'm sick if I'm REALLY sick. (Like if I'm going to throw up or something like that…I'll tell you….or if the pain gets REALLY bad, I'll tell you.) Right now I can manage the pain, and I'm all right; I can take it.

Oh, I'm glad that at least someone else feels the same way about relationships…the talking part. There is something I did not tell you before when you asked about any relationships I might have had. What I am about to tell you is something that I have never told anyone before…and you'll probably think I'm strange because of it, but it is something VERY important to me. I have never allowed myself to get emotionally attached to anyone before…not because of the Code, but because of something else. I want to remain completely pure for my future wife. I don't want to have had any former relationships…not even a date…not even a kiss, unless it is with my future wife. I don't want to give any part of my emotions away to anyone else. That way I can give my whole self to my future wife, and not carry any past relationships with me. That means I do not want to kiss anyone, or give any of my emotions away to ANYONE else. I don't want to do something that would hurt my future wife…the moment I start thinking a girl is beautiful, I stop myself. I think, "What would my future wife think if she saw me looking at another girl." So, to be honest…….I haven't really had crushes on anyone before. I have always stuck by that, and always will. The ONLY person I will give anything of myself to is my future wife.

When I look around and see all these couples making out, it hurts sometimes, but I know that I am saving myself for my wife, and that I will have true love…and not that cheap stuff that I see around all over the place. (By cheap stuff I mean the people that give themselves to a person they hardly know….kissing and saying things to them that should be reserved for the person meant for them. And after the cheap relationship is over, the couple breaks a part, losing a part of themselves, and being so hurt.) I know that the true kind of love that I am after does exist. I read about it before…about real couples who have found it. Because of all this, I do not use the word "love" lightly.

Anyway, you'll definitely have to introduce me to Mark when we get back to Coruscant. So Mark has a crush on a girl named Nina? I can usually handle my anger pretty well. A person has to REALLY hurt me in order for me to be angry….and my father is one person who I did get very ANGRY with. I'm sure that he and I could be good friends. If anyone hurts my mother, or anyone I truly care about, I get extremely angry.

I already told you what my very favorite color is. I like the color light blue…like the blue in the water here. I also like the green in the grass of a well-kept lawn. Those are my two favorite colors.

Padmé, I don't think anything you could ever say could ever offend me.

Well maybe…maybe if he could come to Naboo, to your house, I could test him. I have a midi-cholorian counting machine thing here, so I could check for him. I use it in case there is some top secret thing for only Jedi to get into…and because there are so many Jedi in the galaxy, they might not recognize me, so I might have to test my own blood to prove that I am a Jedi. (The machine I have doesn't give you the amount of midi-cholorian; it just says whether a person has enough to be force sensitive or not.) I'm not allowed to know how much midi-cholorian I have (in other words how force sensitive I am) until the Council allows it. That's the way it is with all Padawans.

Yeah…well I wish your parents would at least acknowledge me as a person. Sigh…it's so tough trying to sort all this out in my mind. I want to like your parents, and I want them to like me.

Well, I think it will be hard to get to know your mother. Your father seemed to take to me a little easier. He and I talked……um….yeah….so…..it was good to talk with him. Sorry about mentioning how much danger you were in. I just thought that they had a right to know the truth. They are your parents, after all.

I was only wondering if you could tell me about your family members…I don't know….anything that you find interesting. I do like your home very much. I would like to know more about them.

I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree on the absolute power thing. There is no rule that says absolute power makes that person a bad ruler. The right person in power wouldn't make a rule that everyone would disagree with. You're wrong….if a person had absolute power, that doesn't necessarily mean that they won't give it up. The Senate wouldn't necessarily have to be gotten rid of. The dictator could still have them meet so that he/she would know what the people wanted. Oh….I don't know……but it could work.

Uh….I met the Chancellor when I was a stranger to him. Do you remember the first time I was on Coruscant…just after Qui-Gon let me come with you guys? You know who it was who comforted me in the hallway? That's right…it was Palpatine. He was nice then, and my opinion of him has not changed!

I'll be sure to thank Obi-Wan for you the next time I speak with him. There is one thing I know I couldn't trust him about…he's made it very clear. If I tell him…he'd see that I got expelled from the Jedi Order. He threatened me in his last message. I started telling him too much. I….I don't know whether or not he's told the Council. Knowing him, he probably has. They haven't done anything about it, though. Thanks for the offer, but I can't really talk to you about it either…at least not right now. I might later…we'll see how it goes. I'm honestly trying to fight it alone. It's something I need to figure out for myself.

I'm surprised that you haven't been in a relationship with anyone because you're so beautiful, and I can't imagine that the guys around you haven't noticed.

I don't really know about the Jedi that are married. There aren't very many of them…I never actually met them. Qui-Gon just told me about them…I don't really remember what he said. All I know is that the Council would never let me marry. I don't even think they would let me if I were an endangered species. Sorry…..there's no mistaking what Obi-Wan told me on the subject.

Another Jedi told me once – I can't remember who it was – it was probably Qui-Gon, Yoda, or Mace Windu…anyway someone told me that there used to be other color gems that were available to build lightsabers from…but back before the Republic was founded, the Sith destroyed the planet that had most of the other color crystals on it. LOL. Good thing you're not a Jedi then. Red is the color of the Sith…we Jedi don't use it. As you can probably guess, only Sith have red lightsabers.

I don't plan on ever changing my lightsaber color. I built this thing myself.

I think a picnic would be nice. Where do you think the best place for one would be? LOL…swimming…..I still haven't learned how to swim. Can you believe it? I'm willing to learn, though. Do you think you could manage to teach me?

Ah…so your parents do have a pet! Well, whatever this Angel is…I think I'm allergic to it, and it really needs to stay away from me.

Also, we should be leaving for that place that you thought it would be safe to go to here. What is it…some kind of summer home or camp or what? You should be packing soon…I am already packed. I really enjoyed seeing your home, but we need to be moving onto that safe house now. I don't want to draw too much attention to you, just in case someone is looking for you and learned that you landed on Naboo. We should leave tomorrow morning. Is that okay with you? Besides that….my allergies are still bothering me.

I'll talk to you soon.

Anakin Skywalker


	42. Note 42 Padme

Author - Jaid Skywalker

.net/u/88042/Jaid_Skywalker

And

Author - My Lady Vader

.net/u/2115252/My_Lady_Vader

Note 42

Ani,

I guess you're right. As soon as this threat is over with I plan to work even harder then I have in the past.

Really? Every time I mention embroidery, I get weird looks. I'd love to show you what I can do! My drawings are very amateurish, but I've been told they are good. Holo vids...um, I like a variety. I like stuff that is funny or that has a lot of action/adventure and drama in it. Romances are all right, but I like the older ones. Some of the new ones are a little to racy for my tastes. I pretty much like any movie that has good acting and a good plot. War movies (at least, the realistic ones) I can't watch and I can't watch horror. They affect me a lot. We can play some vid games! I think we've got some racing ones...lol, here I am, former Queen, 23 year old Senator and I'm talking about playing vid games.

Yes, I did do it. Mother wanted me to learn, so I did. I guess it's okay when it is finished, but I really hate doing it. My hands are busy, but my mind really does nothing; I don't like it when my mind does nothing. I have some hidden away in a drawer, but I'd be glad to show them to you.

You're welcome. I'm glad you liked them. Mother always wants me to 'improve.' Drawing is the only thing I can do that relaxes my brain. It seems as if I just let my hand do the thinking. I really do enjoy it.

Oh, it's not that good!! Better then yours, maybe, but not that good. :) Yes it is; it's near the lake retreat where we'll be staying. It's much more pretty in real life as you'll see.

Books. Um, I like fanasty, mystery and historical fiction. I also read about the latest politics. But when I was younger, I would read novels. I don't remember how many I've read. What about you?

The outdoors seems to tug at my soul somehow...I don't know.

Gardening is fun. Maybe you can help me do a little of it here. And puzzles are fun too. My mom has a collection of them...she might let us piece a few of them together.

Wow! Thats amazing. You'll have to show my your list sometime and tell me about the systems! I've never really cared for flying. At least not since Corde died...

I'm not a fan of sports either; my father is though.

That's odd. I hope she is okay. I really liked your mother; made me wish she was mine at times. Or at least that my mother was like her. Maybe I can send someone there to see how she is...Oh...can you contact your mother and see what is happening? I hope that it is not serious...or can you tell? Tell me if I can help.

Oh, sorry. I guess I just didn't think of it at the time. I mean, we were discussing so many other things and the subject didn't come up. You'll have to excuse my parents; they are a little snobbish.

What would you like to know about them all? I mean, besides the usual. And about our home. I hope you like it here. Well, I'm going to ask Mother about those puzzles. Meet me in the living room later?

I think that is very mature and sweet of you. Your wife will be a lucky woman; especially since you have so much consideration already for her and you don't even know who she will be yet!

Mark will like you, I'm sure. He's really rather friendly, but he is a bit shy at first.

I'm sure he would like that. It is too late for him to join the Jedi, I'm sure, but still, it would be nice for him to know. I'll ask him.

You really think so? Wow, thanks. I'm always a bit shy showing people my work, since I'm pretty much solely known as a politician. I'm glad you liked them.

Yes, it is. We could visit there; it's not far from the safe house and it is so beautiful. There is also a lake we can visit and I can show you were my cousins and I used to swim during the summer.

Yes, I do like to watch holo vids. I mainly watch them with Sola when we're together, but I will watch anything with a happy ending. I'm a sucker for happy endings. That would be fun. I've never tried a vid game before. But they sound fun! Yes, blood and gore aren't my thing.

I don't like potty humor either, but I do like some wacky sort of stuff. Oh, I think it was called "The Will to Love"...or was that a different one? Sorry, I'm not feeling too well this morning and my head feels thick. I'm cheating and looking through my fav vids right now...okay, I found it. It was "Saber's Kiss." I'm glad you liked it. "The Will to Love" is awfully funny and has a cute ending if you want to watch that. It's about this guy who's family is making him marry this awful girl. Then the girl he really does love shows up and rescues him and they end up getting married. That's a bad summary, but it was cute.

I know! I don't mind some psychological dramas, but most horror is just bloody and gross.

lol, glad to know I'm not so bad. I just get nervous and uptight, especially around those tight corners! I must have hit that one place a hundred times, lol.

Yeah, that type of fantasy isn't so great. I love that sort of stuff though. It's great fun.

I've never seen such devotion before, Anakin. To care for one person you've not even met is amazing. It touches my heart, truly.

Don't mind my parents, Ani. They're like that with every friend I make, except for Sabe and Krillen and that's because they both are from noble families. They are nice people, just a little too concerned with status.

Yes, he does. He is very gentlemanly to her, giving her flowers at times. It's very funny. Oh? What did he do? No, I shouldn't of asked. Never mind, it's none of my business.

I'm glad. I'd hate to offend anyone.

I asked him about it, and he said that he was fine with not knowing. He said that he doesn't want to leave Coruscant to check for something that doesn't really matter, but I know that's not true. Maybe when we go back to Coruscant you can test him.

When will the council let you find out your midi-cholorian count? And why won't they let padawans know?

It wasn't the palace that is there today. It's a model of the one that was first built; when Naboo still depended on blood lines to have an hier to the throne.

Yes, I wish they would. All that Coruscanti royal blood makes them proud; I don't enjoy proud people. Not that kind of pride any way.

That's alright...yes, they do have a right to know, but they overreact so much. You know how it is I'm sure.

Well, I've been so busy at times that I don't know them as well as I should. It's kind of sad.

I'm really sorry, Ani. I wish I could help.

That's fine with me; I'm ready to go. It's actually a summer home owned by my parents, but they haven't used it since I was little. It is very beautiful.

I don't know...It would be very hard to pass up. I only hope that if that does happen, the right person will get the job. I still don't like the idea of absolute power.

Thank you. I wouldn't tell my mentor everything either...the only one I could do that with would be Sabe. We should visit them before we get to the lake retreat.

Palpatine helped me often when I was queen; and I enjoy talking with him. It's just something about him makes me afraid...I don't know what it is. Maybe I'm just being silly.

I wonder why? What does red represent, besides sith? Do you know why they chose it?

I'd love to teach you! Sabe and I used to go swimming when I was queen. We can practice in the lake.

I've met Angle...I don't think her name fits her. She hates me...the feeling is mutual however.

That's fine with me. I'll get packed. Don't forget to visit Sabe...she would kill me if we forgot.

I'll see you in the morning,

Padme


	43. Note 43 Anakin

Note 43

Padmé,

Now I need to tell you something…this isn't the best time to say it….and I've calmed down enough so that I could write you this…but…Padme…please hear me out. That's all I ask is that you just read this. I…I…care for you a lot…and….well…I love you so dearly. I've tried to hide it, and I've tried to push my feelings away because I know that do not feel the same way towards me, but I just can't push my feelings aside. You don't have to do anything about it…I just felt that you deserved to know how I felt about you. I hope it doesn't change our friendship. I have more to say to you.

I know, I know. I'm 20 and you're 25…and you're a Senator, and I'm a Jedi/Padawan who was formerly a slave. I know that your parents don't see me as an equal, and I know they would disapprove of the relationship. I'm not sure your feelings on this matter, but I assumed that you felt the same way, so that's why I didn't ask you about your feelings on that matter.

I know I am beneath you…and I know that you just see me as a little boy…..as evident by your messages, and I know all this…..but I also know that I love you…and I know that I would never let anything happen to you. Don't worry….I know that these feelings are one-sided, and I'm not going to try to kiss you or anything. I will keep this at a professional level. I am your protector, and I will carry out my duties just as I have done before.

I just wanted to tell you that I had certain feelings for you. I like you a lot…so now you know. It's in your hands now. Do with this information whatever you want…just please don't laugh at me.

I…I need to tell you something else. I've been trying my very best not to say a thing about this, but I must. I've said to you before, but not for a long time, so just listen. Don't stop reading until you've seen the entire message. Let me quote you in your last message, "I think that is very mature and sweet of you. Your wife will be a lucky woman; especially since you have so much consideration already for her and you don't even know who she will be yet!" That's wrong Padmé…I know who my wife will be. Ever since the first time I saw you 10 years ago, I knew that I would marry you. There hasn't been a day that has gone by that I haven't thought of you. I was afraid that when I would see you again, that feeling might not be there…but when Obi-Wan and I saw you…when I saw you for the first time in 10 years, I KNEW I was right. It's the Force telling me.

I know we haven't been together that long, but I do love you very, very much. I have enjoyed the time we've spent together, and you are the nicest and most intelligent female I have ever met. I know I love you…and I hope that I can prove it to you in some way. I cannot stand being away from you…and I don't think I'll be able to live without you. Let me know if you're suffering as much as I am. I want to marry you, Padmé…will you marry me?

I had no place saying that. I'm sorry…I just wanted to tell you so that you would know how I feel towards you. I shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry.

Why did I have to make a fool of myself again? I did that 10 years ago and I'm doing that again!!!! I'm so sorry.

I hope you realize how much I love you now, and can tell that I do have consideration for you. As I said, I didn't allow myself to go out with anyone, or to even develop crushes on anyone….because I wanted to be pure for you. I have never kissed, hugged, or showed any kind of affection to any female in my entire life.

Okay…I think I've said too much now. I hope you don't hate me now.

So when do I get to meet this friend of yours? This Mark person?

Oh…okay…I don't know…I was just trying to think of something to ask you. I can't wait to meet ALL your friends.

Yeah, I can arrange that. Just have him come over here sometime, and I can check to see whether he's Force Sensitive or not. I think all Force Sensitive individuals should at least know they are Force Sensitive. Have you asked him if he would like me to check for him?

Yes, I really do think your art work is amazing! I meant every word of it. I'm not just saying that because I'm in love with you either. You do have a great talent, and I'm sure any normal person would agree with me.

This summer house is so beautiful. You were a lucky girl growing up on this planet. My childhood experience was to walk around all day seeing nothing but sand. There was the occasional sandstorm, but Tatooine is nothing compared to your planet. You used to swim in those lakes? I don't know how to swim. Being from a desert planet, I never learned. It must be nice. I'd give anything to live on such a beautiful planet. It's so green here too. You have meadows full of wild flowers. I really like that.

I also enjoyed our picnic we had. Do you do that often? Grass is so soft…on Tatooine all we have is sand. I don't like sand. It gets all over the place…it's not like here.

What were those animals that were in the meadow with us? I had fun standing on them trying to ride on their backs. Of course I fell off, but it was still fun. What went through your head when I pretended to be hurt? It was pretty funny to see your reaction.

I love being outside. It's so nice here…we can relax, and I don't have to worry about Obi-Wan getting on me for having fun. Do you have any trails we can go on around here…like as a nature walk or something?

I don't know about you, but I can't remember the last time when I had this much fun…but I think it's because I get to be around you all day, and we're becoming really close friends.

Padmé, you weren't feeling well yesterday morning? What's wrong? If you need to lie down or something, go ahead. I don't want you getting sick. Is it the flu or something? It's been going around. You seemed to be fine this afternoon, though.

Sure, we can watch 'The Will to Love" here. It's sounds good. Did you bring it with you? Yeah, it was "Saber's Kiss," that I was talking about. It is really good! And I agree with you – happy endings are definitely a plus.

Oh yeah…I remember the part of the game you were talking about…you DID hit that corner multiple times, but I wasn't counting.

I'm sorry that your parents are obsessed with status. Sigh…I wish everyone would accept everyone else for their differences. I doubt it will ever happen though.

I see…so Naboo used to depend on blood lines for their heirs? What blood line? Or is the family extinct?

I'm really glad the trip over to this beautiful summer house went well. It doesn't look like anyone has tracked us here, which is good. I'm really enjoying myself. Of course I am keeping my mission in the back of my mind…but there appears to be no danger here. What do you think? I think this place is too beautiful for danger anyway. I worry about Obi-Wan, about my mother, and I know you want to be back on Coruscant for that vote….but I'm trying to push away all of that and just enjoy my time here with you. This will probably be the only chance I'll ever have to spend time alone with you…unless you marry me. I know Obi-Wan wouldn't allow me to see you without a reason. So if we are to get married, we have to get to know each other now, and have everything settled between us.

How far are you and Sola in age? My brother, Owen is 4 years older than me, and Rhun is 5 years older. Being a slave on Tatooine did not give me much of an opportunity to see the galaxy…and as a Jedi Padawan, I've been living away from most everyday people. It's too bad that Gwydion wasn't there when we visited your family. Where was he? Do you have any idea?

So the summer house is owned by your parents? That means you can go there whenever you want? If I were you, I'd be LIVING there. How can that house go unused for such a long period of time? Or do they rent it out?

I like certain funny holo vids, but the humor has to be in good taste. I can't stand potty humor (you know what I mean by that, right?) Action and adventure is always good. I liked the one that we watched together. What was the name of that again? It had just the right amount of humor, action/adventure, drama, and romance in it. I hope you enjoyed watching it with me. I know I had a good time. I only like romance vids that reflect my opinion of the subject…so the characters have to follow my standards. I love those kinds of vids…just don't tell anyone. I don't want anyone else to know that I am a romance fan…especially the other Jedi. Did you know the Council has banned Jedi from watching any romance vid out there? I used to sneak them (and sometimes still do) and watch them in my room.

You know something? I HATE horror movies too; they just bother me. I had lots of fun playing the racing vid games. I did beat you, but it was all in fun. You're not that bad at them. Of course…I did get 8789798 points, and you only got 356 points.

What do you mean? You're not 23! I know you're not. I just turned 20 yesterday! (Yeah, I know…I didn't tell you it was my birthday). You can't be 23, because that would mean you were only 3 years older than me. When I was 9, you were 14…so unless you skipped aging a couple years, you've got to be 25. Oops, was I not supposed to say anything about your age? I know some women don't like to give out their real age and pretend that they are younger than they are. Padmé, I don't know why you're already ashamed of your age. You're still young…unless it was to narrow our age gap, and I don't know why you'd want to do that…

I like fantasy too…just as long as it's not the evil kind of fantasy. What I mean by evil kind of fantasy is the fantasy that involves black arts. (You know what I mean by that, don't you.) You like mystery? I do too…and I love historical fiction. I also like the same kinds of books that I like of movies.

I agree…gardening is fun. I was glad that I was able to spend the whole day with you today. I had fun looking at all of your flowers and plants. I have never seen so many in one place before. Your back yard is the most beautiful that I have ever seen. I also enjoyed our fine conversation, and our jokes. I don't think your parents liked it though. I think they thought I was being too friendly with you, but I don't care. I enjoy spending time with you, and if they don't like it…that's too bad.

That puzzle was fun! It was 3-D…and am I wrong, but is it a puzzle of the Naboo palace? It was challenging, but I love challenges.

I have no way of contacting my mother on Tatooine. Tatooine is not part of the Republic, remember? The connections on my ship are not compatible with the connections they have on Tatooine, plus I don't even know where my mother is on Tatooine, so it would be impossible. I cannot tell what kind of situation my mother is in. All I know is that she is in extreme pain. There's nothing you could do to help. I want to go back to Tatooine to find her, but I was told to stay here. I don't know what I'm going to do. I like spending time with you and protecting you, and that is my official job right now. I will give everything to this mission…and I don't want to mess up my first mission on my own…or endanger your life.

Your friend Sabe just had to have us over as soon as she could, didn't she. LOL. It was nice to see her again.

I'm back now. Well, we made it to this Lake retreat house in one piece. I just finished unpacking…

There is one little thing I noticed when I was packing. I'm missing something, and I think I left it at Sabe's when we spent the night there. It's not a big deal, and I'll be okay without it (I should be), but I left my inhaler there. At least that's the only place I can think of that I left it. Ah, I'll be fine. Don't worry about it…forget I mentioned it.

I don't know when the Council will let me see my midi-cholorian count. I suppose it will be sometime after I pass my trials. They don't want Padawans to know because they think it would be too tempting for us…and that it might cause us to have feelings that go against the Jedi Code – like pride or jealousy.

I'm not sure why the Sith chose the color red, but they did. For them it is a symbol of revenge and hate, I think. I really don't know much about Sith.

Good; I look forward to our swimming lessons then.

Sincerely,

Anakin


	44. Note 44 Padme

Author - Jaid Skywalker

.net/u/88042/Jaid_Skywalker

And

Author - My Lady Vader

.net/u/2115252/My_Lady_Vader

Note 44

Ani,

After seeing your message, I'm not exactly sure what to say, except that admittedly, I am surprised and am quite honored that you have these feelings for me. I do want you to know that I care for you deeply; probably more than you know and probably deeper than I should.

The only reason I treated you the way I did was because I thought my feelings were one-sided and I knew that you wanted to be completely pure for your future wife. I wanted to honor that.

I'm not sure about a relationship. I am a Senator and my work would not give me much time for a family. You are a Jedi and the Council would probably not approve; doubly so because they do not have much fondness for politicians I am told. Marriage would be complicated...but...I don't know. I need to think.

Oh Ani, I could never laugh at you; not for something like this. It's too personal.

One think I like about you Anakin, is the fact that you you speak your mind. Never feel about speaking your mind, Ani. Don't worry, You've not made a fool of yourself.

Thank you for this gift of purity, Ani. It means so much to me. And I could never hate you, Ani. Always know that.

We'll meet Mark whenever we go back to Coruscant, though if we go to Corellia, he might be in the embassy there. I hope so; it's been ages since I heard his goofy laugh. I miss him; he was a like a brother in a way.

Yes, I did ask. He wants to try it as soon as possible. He and Daria are going to try to visit us in a day or so.

I'm flattered Ani. Thank you. I know you would not lie to me, so your praise makes it all the more valuable to me.

Never learned to swim? I'll have to teach you a little bit.

Yes, it is very beautiful here; I've always loved it. I think I did take a bit for granted until I was living in Coruscant. That's when I really started to appreciate it.

Those animals are called Shaaks, I beleive and it was very mean of you to do that. I really thought you were hurt! You're lucky I didn't yell at you later.

There's lot's of trails we can take. Do you like rock climbing? I do; maybe we can try that.

I do feel much better, thank you.

Yes, I did bring it. lol, it's not the action/adventure/drama/romance that "Saber's Kiss" was, but it's very cute. The main character guy, Jaras, always reminds me of Mark; very nice, kinda goofy and always slightly clueless, lol. I'm really glad you enjoyed Saber's Kiss. What was your favorite part? Admittedly, I liked the way the saber fights were cheorographed; they did an excellent job with that. And I liked the main character, Mira. She reminds me of Daria (you'll understand when you meet her).

Well, actually, I would be the crown princess of Naboo if we didn't democratically elect our leaders. For a while though, only royals could be elected but times have changed.

Yes, I agree we should talk if we are going to get engaged.

Did I say 23? Oh gosh, I'm sorry Ani. I don't know where my brain has gone lately. Yes I am 25 and I have no idea why I said I was 23. Sorry, there are times my brain takes a vacation and then I'm left with acting stupid. ^__^

Oh, Happy Birthday!

Are you sure Ani? I mean, do you get attacks or something? If you need it, we could probably get some for you.

I'll see you in about an hour for dinner.

Padme.

P.S.

I've taken a walk in the garden and I've been thinking about this message and about you. The truth is that I love you too Ani. I'm not sure when I started; I guess it just sort of crept up on me, but I stifled it because...well, I gave you my reasons.

If it is possible in any way; I will marry you.


	45. Note 45 Anakin

Note 45

Padmé,

I need to tell you something. I don't know if you were aware of this or not, but last night I had another nightmare. I've been having them for about a month; only this one was more intense than any of the past ones. And the dreams feel so real. I'm almost convinced that it's a Jedi vision, but Obi-Wan has never listened to me! Padmé, I feel that if I don't go, she'll die. Someone's hurting her…and they don't intend on stopping it. If it's my father…oh…is he going to get it! I HAVE to get to Tatooine. I know, I know…that I'm supposed to protect you…but she's my mother, and I don't want her to die. I want to do everything I can for her. I treasure our time together, and my assignment, but I feel that I must risk your safety for my mother's. I think you will be safe here on Naboo. Just stay in the house. I don't think anyone is onto our trail, or they would have revealed themselves already. I could not ask you to come with me. I don't know what's going on with my mother, but it could be extremely dangerous there. I wouldn't want to risk that. It's very early in the morning now. I'll be leaving in half an hour. I wanted to tell you before I left, just so you wouldn't panic. I will be back as soon as I can.

I'm sorry that I have to do this. I know this is probably the only time we'll ever have alone with each other, but this thing is out of my hand.

You care for me? How deep, Padmé? Do you love me? Would you marry me…is it that deep?

So you do have feelings for me! You thought your feelings were one-sided? How could you miss my affection for you? I…I was afraid I was making it obvious. So you had no idea that I wanted you to be my future wife? I'm glad that you were able to honor my wish to be completely pure for my future wife…but I don't know how that could have blinded you from seeing my love for you.

But you're not sure about a relationship? Even if you do have feelings for me? Yes, I know you are a Senator, and that that must take a lot of time, but I'm sure you could still have time for a family. Hey, I'm a Jedi Padawan…I know I'm not going to be around you 24/7 if we had a relationship, but I would try to see you as much as possible, and when I did see you, I would give you all my time. A lot of people are busy with jobs, yet still manage to have a relationship. It think it's possible…I want one....I need one with you, Padmé. You don't understand how much it hurts me not to be in a relationship with you. It's like a physical feeling I get from the Force, which torments me when I'm not around you.

You're right, the Jedi Council would not approve of a relationship (in fact they would expel me from the Order if they found out), but no one would have to know. We could keep it a secret. During my breaks from missions, I could come see you on Naboo or Coruscant…and we could spend our time together, talking, and just being there with each other. It would be harder at first, since I'm still a Padawan, and have to go on missions with him, but once I finish the trials and become a full Jedi Knight, when I'm not on missions, I would spend all my time with you. Jedi Knights do make some money, not as much as Senators, I'm sure, but we could work together to support ourselves. Please give this a try?

No, the Jedi Council, in fact the entire Jedi Order does not seem to have much fondness for politicians. I do not understand why not. Supreme Chancellor does not appear corrupt. In fact he is far from it…in my estimation. Maybe he's an exception…but you're not corrupt. If the Jedi Order judged you because you were a politician, they'd be shallow…and…and…thinking about it just makes me mad. How could anyone judge you without getting to know you? It just isn't right.

Okay, you said, "marriage would be complicated…but…I don't know. I need to think." If you need time, I can give it to you. Perhaps while I am away you will be able to come to some kind of decision.

Oh, so you love me? You really love ME? Then are we going to do anything about this. We've both expressed our feelings for each other. If we both love each other, then can't we make a relationship work…or better yet a marriage? Love will be able to handle anything.

Padmé, you said, "If it is possible in any way, I will marry you." Well I'm telling you it is VERY possible. I will find a way for us to marry each other. Do you know of any ministers who would marry us and keep a secret? And if you do, do you know when they could arrange a private ceremony? I will do anything to be with you for my entire rest of my life.

I'm glad you appreciate my gift of purity. It's what you truly deserve.

We can go to Corellia and Coruscant once Obi-Wan has found out who your attacker is. We shouldn't think of going anywhere else…at least you shouldn't think of it…the only reason I'm going to Tatooine is because of my mother. I will return to you as quickly as possible. You have my word on that. I've already started packing.

I'm sorry that I will not be able to meet your friends when they come. Please give them my apologies, I would have loved to meet them.

No, I never learned to swim. Tatooine does not have any standing water on it…except close to the poles, but I was raised as a slave and never was able to go that far from Watto's shop (because of that device that would have blown me up.) And once I became a Padawan I was almost 10 years old. I had never learned to swim before then, so I was afraid of the water. I still am. But, if you were to teach me, it wouldn't be so bad. When I come back from Tatooine, you can teach me, okay?

Okay, so those animals are called shaaks? They're cute animals. I want one for a pet! Just kidding, but they would make cute pets. Me get hurt? Come on, how could you think that? LOL, okay, so I've gotten hurt before (I broke my leg once). I just wanted to see your reaction.

Do I like rock climbing? What if I were to tell you I've never been rock climbing before? There aren't exactly rocks on either Tatooine or Coruscant…and during our times off, Obi-Wan would have considered it something foolish. I'd like to try it. That will have to wait until I'm back too. Obi-Wan deprived me of doing fun things.

I'm glad you feel better.

My favorite part of Saber's Kiss. Let me think here…I enjoyed the part where the bad guy died…and paid for everything bad that he had ever done. The saber fights were good…but not like real life. If those actors fought against real Jedi, they wouldn't stand a chance.

Oh, so you're from a real royal bloodline? Wow. I guess I should have known, that. You look like a princess…or at least some kind of royalty, and you act like it too. (In a good way.)

Oh, so you said, "I agree we should talk if we are going to get engaged." You were brave enough to bring that word up? That's a step in the right direction, although I'll feel a lot better when I hear you say that you'll marry me for sure.

Don't worry about the age thing. I knew you were 5 years older than me! I just was trying to see why you said you were 23, when you're not. So it was a simple mistake then? I see.

Yeah…well my birthday went all right.

Well…I think I'll be all right. I do have asthma, but it's not very bad at all, but I do get attacks sometimes. Not very often, though. Obi-Wan didn't even know I had asthma for the first few months when I was training under him. I eventually told him, but he didn't believe me…and he still doesn't. I have to hide it from him, or he will yell at me because he thinks I'm faking it. It's really not a big deal. I think I'll be fine. I probably should have my inhaler, but since I left it at Sabe's…I don't have it. I don't think it's going to be a problem that I don't have it. I don't even know what we can do about it anyway, because we can't go back to her house.

However……I just did some thinking....Well, since my plans have changed, and I'm leaving Naboo for the moment, I probably should stop back at Sabe's before I leave to get my inhaler. Just to be on the safe side, although I'm probably not going to need it. But then again, you never know.

I'm sorry I have to leave you. Promise me you'll stay safe here while I'm gone.

With Love,

Anakin Skywalker


	46. Note 46 Padme

Author - Jaid Skywalker

.net/u/88042/Jaid_Skywalker

And

Author - My Lady Vader

.net/u/2115252/My_Lady_Vader

Note 46

Ani,

How terrible! I understand you must go. But I will be going with you. That way you would still be doing your assignment and I'd like to help your mother. She was such a sweet woman. But I suppose you'll be gone by now.

Well, maybe you were being obvious, but I wouldn't be able to tell. I'm not very good at things like that; I have never been able to tell if a guy found me attractive or was flirting or something like that. It's some sort of weird mental blindness I have.

Yes, I really do love you. So much, it almost frightens me. I've never had feelings like this before. That's why I'm trying to go slow, because I'm really not sure of what to do.

You've made some good points and even though it would be hard, I'm willing to try it. No scratch that, I want to try it. I want to make this work between us.

I don't know many ministers, and the ones I do know would probably insist on telling my parents. But if we did get married, I would like for my close friends to be there. Mark, Daria, and Sabe and Krilien and a few others. I know they wouldn't tell anyone.

Yes, I'll teach you how to swim and how to rock climb. You'll love it!

Well…don't do it again. I nearly had a heart attack! Lol, not really, but if you do something like that again, I'll have to hurt you (lol, just joking, I couldn't hurt you intentionally).

No, I guess not. They were still interesting for someone like me to watch tho (considering that I've only seen Jedi fight once and not against each other). My favorite part was when the hero's friends arrived to "save" them; that one dark-haired one reminds me of one of my friends; always has to crack a joke at the wrong time.

Well, you asked and I have had a great deal of time to think about it. I will marry you. I want to spend my life with you Ani. I know that for sure now.

I will try, but I wish I was going with you. I'm sure I could help in some way!

Be careful and I hope that your mother is alive and not too damaged. If your visions are correct, I guess that she is injured in some way. Be safe and remember, I love you.

Your Padmé.


	47. Note 47 Anakin

Note 47

Padmé,

I did not expect you to go with me…you know we're walking into possible danger, right. But I did let you come along. I don't like being away from you…and…and I'm glad you decided to come, even if it could be dangerous. Thank you for coming along. When I got your letter, I hadn't left yet. You caught me at just the right time!

Well as you know we landed by the Lars homestead. Do you remember me telling you that I freed my mother, and that she went back to live with the rest of my family? My brothers and my father? And that my father had changed his last name from Skywalker to Lars after he sold my mother. (That's why my last name is Skywalker and his last name is Lars.)

Well as you know from our dinner conversation, my mother is in danger. My dad doesn't think she's alive, but I KNOW she is. I can feel it through the Force. I've got to save her. Owen let me borrow his speeder so that I could go look for her.

What do you think of my brothers? I still don't like Rhun very well. I don't think he understands me. And my father…oh boy…I REALLY don't like him very well. It's too bad he lost his leg searching for my mother, but he gave up on looking for her! Not only that, but he sold my mother when she was pregnant with me! I'm still mad at him and…and…hate him for that!

Because those Sandpeople captured my mother, I'm going to go find her and save her. You must understand, though, that you can't come with me. It would be too dangerous. Who knows what they're doing to my mother! I could not bear to see you hurt too. You're going to have to stay here. These are good people, and you'll be safe.

You have to tell me what happens back at the house.

It seems as if my brother dating the Beru lady. What do you think of her?

And my brother Rhun is away right now….

I'm glad that we got to see each other's families. They're quite different, I know. My family is below yours socially, but they're still good people. I know you know that, though.

Padmé, do you know how much it pained me to hear about those sandpeople kidnapping my mother? That's why I didn't say much during dinner. I hope no one thought I was rude. After all, I have never really talked with my family much…only one other time, and that was when I was 11 years old and rescued my family.

LOL, I think that's the way it is with everyone, Padmé. It seems like no one can tell if another person likes them. It's kind of neat, because then the people have to talk about it and discuss it with the other person. It's more romantic that way. Maybe that's the way it's intended to be…the way God wanted it to be.

You know that I have never felt like this about anyone before either. But I love you too. I have no doubt that it is love. It would be nice to take the relationship slowly, but we don't have a choice. I'll only be able to be around you until Obi-Wan finds out about your assassin, and then the Council will force me to be on other missions. I don't want to lose you Padmé…to not be able to spend anymore time with you. That would kill me. Besides, I know you're the wife intended for me, so there really isn't any reason to take it slowly. I want to make a commitment to you, Padmé…a commitment of marriage.

I do not have a ring right now, but while I was off at Sabe's getting my inhaler back, I just happened to stop by a shop close by. Before I left, I took a few minutes to look at your dress size…and then bought something for you. I'll explain it further on in this letter. Anyway, I came back and picked you up so we could leave for Tatooine. I hope that in my absence you had enough time to pack.

Because I have no ring, and I do not have enough money on me right now to buy one. So what I've done is gotten you something that you can wear now…..that will be a secret to just those who we tell about the marriage….but to everyone else it would not mean anything. I bought you this pretty blue dress. Yesterday I went through your clothes to see what size you wore…so it should fit.

Now about the dress…I was struggling with what I could get you that wouldn't be noticeable to the Jedi Council…but that would mean something to you. I had seen the dress a couple days before, and I thought that it was very pretty. Don't think I'm crazy, but last night I had this dream…I think it was a Jedi vision or something…but I saw the dress and I just knew that I had to get it for you. When I saw it again, I got this feeling…and I know that it's going to bring something very special to us…to our relationship. I'm not exactly sure what that something is, but I do know that it will change both of our lives for the better. Please accept this gift, and guard the dress well. It is very special. Like I said, I'm not sure what it will bring….only that it will change our lives forever. Don't ever let anything happen to it…because it is my gift to you.

Well when I bought the dress, the person I bought it from said that it was made of a special fabric that's only been made since last week.

The only thing left to do is find a minister. There must be one somewhere…but I think we're going to have to eventually tell your parents. They deserve to know, since you are their daughter. I'm eventually going to have to tell Obi-Wan. I'll wait as long as I can. They can't make me divorce you if we're already married by the time they find out. I don't think they'd really expel me from the Jedi Order either…just for marrying someone. That would be wrong. Besides, I'm one of the most powerful Jedi…I KNOW I am. Palpatine has even noticed, and he's not even Force Sensitive! Even though I don't know what my midi-cholorian count is, I know it must be pretty high…because Qui-Gon wanted me to train, and the Council eventually let me train…AND Obi-Wan let me become his Padawan AND I am far more advanced in my training than the other Padawans my own age, who have trained from infancy.

Anyway, if you know no other ministers, except ones that would tell your parents, we'll have to go for it. I want to be properly married to you, as you deserve to be. And yes, you can invite some of your friends to the wedding. I want my mother to come.

By the way, do you like my lightsaber? I don't think I've ever let you look at it closely, have I? Well I have my initials on the bottom of it, so that I can never get it mixed up with anyone else's. Do you like the color? I think it's a pretty shade of blue. It's the same color as Obi-Wan's. He could be using Qui-Gon's green one, but he didn't feel right doing that, so he built himself another blue one to match his old one.

I can't wait for you to show me how to swim and rock climb. I think I will love it, especially with you as my instructor We just have to wait until we get back to Naboo first.

All right, all right, Padmé. I promise I won't do that again. Sorry for scaring you like that.

From my Jedi visions, and from what my father and brothers have said, my mother is most likely VERY injured right now.

I must go and rescue her. Be strong for me, Padmé. I will return soon with my mother.

Love,

Anakin Skywalker


	48. Note 48 Padme

Author - Jaid Skywalker

.net/u/88042/Jaid_Skywalker

And

Author - My Lady Vader

.net/u/2115252/My_Lady_Vader

Note 48

Ani,

I do know that, but if I am going to be your wife someday, then I need to face things with you. Besides, I would be terribly lonely without you there with me.

I see. I was wondering about that.

Your father seems like such a gentle man; it's hard for me to imagine him doing that. But I do believe you. Your brother has been polite to me. Owen seems to be very pleasant.

I understand. I would probably be in your way as well, and that would put us both in danger. Helping Beru is keeping me busy, but I still am thinking of you. Be careful, Ani.

Beru is such a sweet young woman. I feel a bit sorry for her though; and it seems like so much to give up to come live in this deserted place. But she loves Owen and I can tell.

They really are. I have enjoyed their company a lot.

I know it did. I could tell from your posture and your face. I wanted to do something to help you, but I didn't know what to do. I think they all understood.

lol, I guess you are right.

Okay, I understand. I'm willing to marry you; you know that. But there is so much planning to do! I wish I could talk to Channa, but she's in Corellia with her husband.

Oh, Ani...I hardly know what to say. I will cherish this dress all my life, you can be sure of that.

Okay. But how about this? I mentioned my friend Channa just a minute ago. She and her husband are part of the Corellian embassy and I know they traveled back to Corellia for a few months. Mark and Nia will all ready be there (they both work at the embassy as well), and my other friends can come easily. I can contact Channa from your ship and knowing her, she'll have everything planned and ready when we arrive. Then, we can go back to Naboo and tell my parents. Does that sound good to you?

Yes, I do. I always felt for Obi-Wan after Qui-Gon died. I know you were attached to him as well, but he was Obi-Wan's master since Obi-Wan was twelve. Your saber is really neat though. Oh by the way, did you like "Will to Love"? I wasn't sure, because you seemed a little distracted, but I guess it was because you were thinking about leaving Naboo and going to get your mother.

lol, I'm sure you will be a fine student! You'll probably outshine me pretty quick; I have to admit I'm not as athletic as I used to be.

Hurry back Ani. I love you. Be safe dearest.

Your Padme.


	49. Note 49 Anakin

Note 49

Padmé,

Well…so far on my search for my mother…I have not been able to locate her yet. I'm not going to stop until I do, though. On my way out into the section of the planet where I know most people do not live, I ran into a group of Jawas. I asked them where the nearest Sandperson camp was. They told me. (My father had told me before I left which direction the Sandpeople had gone to, and Owen let me borrow his speeder.). It's a long way down, Padmé…but I'm going to jump. Using the Force, I'll be all right. I don't know what I'll find, but I will NOT turn my back on my mother.

I am glad that you take situations seriously between us. Facing things together is definitely something we will have to do together someday. I only hope that I can be as good about it as you have been.

My father might act like a nice man now, but I cannot believe that his actions are genuine. Anyone that sells their wife and unborn child could never be kind or gentle. I will never forgive him for doing what he did…never. That might sound cold to you, but you did not have to endure slavery as I did. I'm glad that my brother has been polite to you too. If anyone in my family tries to harm you, tell me immediately. I will not have them do that! I don't know if my family knows that we are in love or not. Have you heard any indication that they know? You said that Owen seems very pleasant to you. Good. If you have to talk to anyone, I'd rather you talk to him. He's the one I trust the most.

No, Padmé, it's not that you would be in my way…it's just that I could never blame myself if something were to happen to you. That's why I didn't want you to go with me when I looked for my mother. You're helping Beru a lot? What do you think of her? She hasn't made that much of an impression on me yet, but I have spent very little time in that moisture farm. By the way, what do you think of the moisture farm? I had never been in one before this. I think it's rather interesting. Did you notice the painted ceiling in the eating room? And did you see their garage? I happened to have a brief look around…and I would love to spend a few hours in that garage to see what it's like, look at all the machines… And how many bedrooms do they have in this house? If I'm not mistaken, I think there are 3. (Probably one for Owen, one for Rhun , one for my parents). The last time I was there, when I freed my mother, I did not get a chance to actually see the house…only meet everyone outside.

And my father…have you talked much to him?

Good…I'm glad you have enjoyed my family's company a lot. I'm sure they all like you…they have no reason not to. I just don't know how they'll feel about me…their relative that they hardly know, getting married. I know I put both you and them in an awkward position, but I couldn't help it.

You will marry me then? WONDERFUL. Now all we have to decide on is when…it has to be soon…so that the ceremony can take place before the Jedi Council sends me on another mission. I want to spend as much time together with you as I can. We don't have to have a big wedding…in fact we shouldn't. Maybe the ceremony would be more meaningful if you weren't worried about decorations and fancy stuff. Your concentration would be more centered on our commitment, our relationship…

I'm glad that you are pleased with the dress, and that you will cherish it the rest of your life. May it forever be a reminder of our love for each other.

Yes, you did mention your friend Channa earlier in the letter. Maybe you could tell me more about your friends than you already have said. I don't believe you have mentioned them all to me yet. Your friend is a member of the Corellian embassy? Well I guess you certainly know a lot of people in high places. Your other friends Mark and Nia also work at the embassy. Oh….. Well if you want to invite your most inner circle of friends to the wedding, that would be fine…but no more than you think would be absolutely necessary. We don't want the Jedi Council to find out about this wedding…or anyone that might inform them. Padmé…we have to be very careful about how many trips we make. You must remember that an assassin is still after you. We are safer if we remain in a few places rather than go all over the galaxy. Do you think you could contact your friends and parents by a different way…such as sending them messages or something? I need to see how everything is with my mother. If she is fine when I find her, then we will not need to stay on Tatooine much longer, and we could return to Naboo shortly….

Thanks for the compliments on my lightsaber. And yes, I did enjoy "Will to Love." Sorry if I seem distracted right now, but I am trying to rescue my mother from a very dangerous place.

Okay, Padmé…I look forward to the swimming lessons, instructed by you. You must excuse me. I have neared the camp now.

All right…I'm back now at the homestead. I brought my mother back…I'm not sure if you saw her yet, but if you didn't I don't want you to see her. She's in bad shape, Padmé. She was barely alive when I found her. Somehow she managed to keep herself alive…though she was beaten very badly. If I had not come when I did, I don't think she would have been alive by the next hour. I already took my mother to the Tatooine medical facility. It's so horrible…Padmé.

After I jumped down to the level of the houses, I tried to reach out to my mother through the Force. I felt her presence coming from one of the little dirt huts where two bone dogs were fighting. I used my lightsaber to cut the wall so that I could get inside. After I kicked back the part of the wall, I just saw her tied up against some sticks, standing or leaning upright. She had blood all over her, and cuts and bruises…and I could tell she was near death. I…I don't want to talk about it much, but I was able to talk to her a little bit, and she recognized me…and said that she loved me before she fainted. I knew she didn't have much time left, and took her home, and then to the medical facility. I couldn't take her directly there because I would have had to cut across too much land without getting her any medical attention whatsoever. Beru tried as best she could to stop some of the bleeding and put some medicine on some of her wounds…and give her something to drink. After that, I took her to the medical facility.

If you're looking for me, I'm in the garage. I…I just don't know what to say. I'm trying to fix one of the machines in here. The shifter broke. Life seems so much simpler when you're fixing things. I'm good at fixing things. I always was. I feel terrible…and….IT'S ALL OBI-WAN'S FAULT. HE'S JEALOUS. HE'S HOLDING ME BACK. If he hadn't prevented me from coming to Tatooine sooner, I could have spared my mother from the beatings. When I took her to the medical facility, the doctors there all shook their heads, saying that there was no hope. I told them that they HAD to try…so eventually they did. I'm afraid that she's going to die, Padmé. And…and…something else…I…no…I HATE those Sandpeople!

You must excuse me…but I am in no mood to write any more. Please, though, you must understand that I do love you….I love you very much.

With love,

Anakin Skywalker


End file.
